Have I been used?

[Willdoitlateron]

My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me earlier this year, didn't get any warning it was coming. I was devastated and it took months to even start feeling slightly normal again. 4 months later I get a text from him and we end up meeting up. For the last 4 months we've been texting most days, meeting up and sleeping together. He text me earlier today to ask what I was up to tonight, I said nothing and invited him over. He replied and said yes he would but he needed to say something first. Cue a text from him saying that it's fine what's been happening the past few months but what if one of us starts dating someone else, and we can't carry on doing this forever.

Wtf? Has he literally been using me all this time?

“Surely you must see that you would feel much better if you stopped seeing him? Why continue to torture yourself...

Do yourself a favor and read:
WOMEN WHO LOVE TOO MUCH and
THE SIX PILLARS OF SELF ESTEEM”

This!

You need to stop being passive in this relationship. Spend some time thinking about what you want, what you believe you deserve, and how to convince yourself that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.

You seem to be allowing him to use your home as drop in centre!

So basically, he was training you to be compliant and not rock the boat in any way, because if you did, then he'd be off like a shot.

That really isn't a healthy relationship, and I suspect that if he is the sort of person to have dished out that sort of treatment in the past, it is highly likely he will do it again. And again. It is a flaw in his personality, not something you can fix.

Is that what you want out of a relationship?

This.

He's a user.

If you don't treat yourself with respect, why would you expect others to?.

Block him and do the www.freedomprogramme.co.uk and have an honest look at what you accept from men.

Good luck.

@Willdoitlateron i think everything you need to hear has been said I would just re-read it through in any moments of weakness as you know you deserve better deep down that’s why you came here

I reckon he has met someone else and is now using you until this new relationship is established or goes nowhere, if the latter he will continue using you until he meets someone else etc etc

@Andypandy799 We're in our mid 30s.

@Willdoitlateron are you going to talk to him about it tonight?

I'd suggest not seeing him tonight. Or ever.

Stay in with a good book (Women who love too much comes to mind...), or do the Freedom Programme.

@Jinglejangle22 I actually told him I can't do tonight so he's not coming over.

Will you see him another night though?

Yeah she will. Here endeth the thread.

@Willdoitlateron

He's using you which is awful of him and he may already be seeing someone else in the hope that when he said "we can't carry on like this what if one of us meets someone" you'll end it so he doesn't have too,

Get rid