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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

OLD, bit of a strange reaction?

48 replies

Doingthiswrong · 06/03/2022 02:40

I'm hugely embarrassed! I dont message first often but saw a reasonably nice looking guy with a nice enough profile.
He'd mentioned a particular interest on his profile so I mentioned it in my message, I figured he probably gets a lot of "hi, how are you" type messages, personally I find them dull, always take more notice if someone actually writes a few lines. I promise it was a completely normal non freaky opening message.

His reply "wtf, are you pissed?"

Not sure why an innocent message would provoke that kind of response! No, I wasn't, everything was spelt right, nothing strange about it.
Wondering if he has some kind of huge chip on his shoulder and was annoyed I didn't fawn over his devastating good looks or wrote a completely fake profile not remembering what he'd said in it.
I know it isn't a huge deal but wtf?

Anyone else had a strange reaction to a message? I'm seriously thinking of just deleting my profile. I've had offers of a sugar daddy, shags, lets get you into bed nudge nudge wink wink.
The best one: "Oh, you're off to bed? Wish I was there with you" a few messages in. Oh dear, in my eyes you've just gone from enjoy chatting with you to absolute sleaze in seconds. I'm no prude but c'mon!!

OP posts:
Itsmewithanewname · 06/03/2022 03:05

What an awful response, you did nothing wrong and he sounds like a prize dick! Ignore him and don't let it hurt you, some people are just not worth it.

It's so hard to make a connection on the small amount of information available.. I've been going through sites tonight, a few conversations but no spark at all. I met my now ex boyfriend with my first bumble match three years ago but he broke up with me a few weeks ago. Getting back onto it has been painful but I'm trying to laugh it off 😂😂 persevere!

Lady0racle · 06/03/2022 06:28

He’s a weirdo. It’s not you so don’t feel embarrassed. Block and move on.

Somuddled · 06/03/2022 07:04

The only time that reaction would make sense of if you actually know the person and you messaging him on a dating app would be inappropriate. For example, if he is actually a cousin, half brother, ex of your best friend, current boss etc. Are you absolutely sure you don't know this person?

NutellaEllaElla · 06/03/2022 07:32

Ah well, that's the good thing about online dating, you don't have to reply to him.

PortalooSunset · 06/03/2022 07:35

Maybe someone altered his profile without his knowledge so he had nfi what you were referring to. Or maybe he's just a dick.

DropYourSword · 06/03/2022 07:36

I really curious at to what you wrote!
But he sounds like an idiot. No need for that response.

Laptopsandmouses · 06/03/2022 07:37

What did you actually write?

MrsGHarrison87 · 06/03/2022 07:38

What exactly did you say in the message? I think it's worth persevering though. I must have had thousands of messages over the 2 years I did OLD and most of them creepy or weird before I met my husband on there.

ShirleyPhallus · 06/03/2022 07:38

What did you write?

Marmelace · 06/03/2022 07:39

Lucky escape for you there

PliqueAjour · 06/03/2022 07:43

You could paraphrase Winston Churchill and say "No, not pissed, but if I were at least I'll be sober in the morning, while you will always be a rude wanker".

hesbeen2021 · 06/03/2022 07:43

Really depends what you wrote as so many have commented

girlmom21 · 06/03/2022 07:46

Yeah it completely depends what you actually wrote, to be fair.

BOOTS52 · 06/03/2022 07:47

He sounds like an absolute dickhead so least you found out now and would just block and ignore that rude idiot. Some people have no sense of humour and he sounds like a boring old fart. Never done online dating as could not be bothered but am guessing it takes time to click with someone and has to be a few that are ok on there as so many have met their long term partners. Maybe ask those who say met their partners/husbands what site they were on as that could help. Hope things get better and don't let that idiot put you off.

PennyDeFuckwit · 06/03/2022 07:49

"Interesting to see that you're into cycling, I am too. Do you enjoy lycra?"

TheProvincialLady · 06/03/2022 07:53

Reply ‘sorry yes definitely had the beer goggles on! Won’t be troubling you again’

Luredbyapomegranate · 06/03/2022 08:09

Dunno. Maybe replying to someone else. Or pissed himself. Or nuts.

Forget about it and move on.

AddictedToOlives · 06/03/2022 08:12

@TheProvincialLady

Reply ‘sorry yes definitely had the beer goggles on! Won’t be troubling you again’
Yes! Love this
TrooBloo · 06/03/2022 08:26

@TheProvincialLady

Reply ‘sorry yes definitely had the beer goggles on! Won’t be troubling you again’
Haha yes!!
CrumpetStrumpet · 06/03/2022 08:32

You have to tell us what you wrote opGrin

Either way though, he's a dick. OLD is littered with them. Just don't reply. You've done nothing wrong.

Anonymousaga · 06/03/2022 09:51

I set up a profile on a site last week, spoke to a couple of blokes and thought, nope, not for me this then deleted my account. Can't be doing with all the fake profiles and nudge nudge wink winks. I want to meet someone walking the dog 😅

Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 06/03/2022 09:58

Need to know the message you sent surely?

Theunamedcat · 06/03/2022 10:04

I'm a Terry pratchett fan chap online claimed to be also I sent a message that pratchett fans would instantly recognise only to get a polite message back saying I assume you sent this to the wrong person sorry I don't chat to people who have so many inboxes they get mixed up good luck with your search.....I replied you should remove Terry pratchett from your things I like to read because clearly you haven't

OhMygodddd · 06/03/2022 10:06

Maybe, depends what you wrote. What was it and I’ll tell you if you sounded pissed

AHungryCaterpillar · 06/03/2022 11:39

Yeh we’re gonna need to know what you actually wrote...

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