People who say they don't believe you.

[Danny4445]

I've no idea why people do this or what they are hoping to achieve from it. I just find it really rude and belligerent.

I've got people in my life who don't believe anything I say. They say it over the most stupid things and I'm not known as a liar.

Eg Do you shower every day?
Yes, I tend to shower every day
Even if you're not going out?
Yes
I don't believe you!

WTAF? How does this person know I don't? Who do they think they are to say they don't believe me? It's ridiculous. What are they getting from this? I'd never say that to someone, even if I didn't believe them.

What am I meant to do when someone says they don't believe me?

Shrug your shoulders and move on.

It's not like it is a contest you have to win. So what if they don't believe you. You know you are right, so you should try and let your own self validation be good enough for you.

It happens a lot though. I don't understand why people do it. I'm wondering if it's a power thing. My family do this all the time. I'm so pissed off with it.

As in your shower example above, I think some people also struggle accepting that others might do things differently, and rather than just accept something different. It's just easier to try and shame the other person and call them names. It comes from a very myopic view, coupled with their need to be "right" and failing to consider than different doesn't mean wrong.

Agree. People struggle to believe people are different to them or choose to do things differently. If someone doesnt believe you, view it as their version of their narrow mindedness.

Ps. Erm ...unless you possibly have a body odour issue and they are trying to subtly hint to you to wash more?

Do it back to them, every time they say something, they'll soon stop!

Probably cos they don’t, so they find it hard to believe that someone else would.

Omg Not being believed is the MOST INFURIATING thing. And it's always over something really strange and not very important. Its taken me 40 years to learn to roll my eyes and not spend hours ruminating on it.

It is absolutely infuriating and frustrating because the more you argue against it the more humiliating it is. You're stuck between a rock and a hard place!

And no, I don't smell I think my very direct family would have told me if I did.

@Danny4445

It is absolutely infuriating and frustrating because the more you argue against it the more humiliating it is. You're stuck between a rock and a hard place!

And no, I don't smell I think my very direct family would have told me if I did.

So don't argue. No longer stuck.

If you are comfortable that your answer was truthful, then aside from arguing to simply prove you are right, why even argue? What does it matter that the other person thinks you are right or not?

Moving on then, they have shown you how they view you, and what they think and feel, so now you have to decide if that is the kind of person you want to have in your life.

Not stuck at all, unless you want to be.

They are pressing your buttons.

Drop the rope.

I know people who do this. It's so fucking weird. Who do they think they are?!

"Eg Do you shower every day?
Yes, I tend to shower every day
Even if you're not going out?
Yes
I don't believe you!"
THEN WHY ASK A QUESTION IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO ACCEPT THE ANSWER YOU ABSOLUTE KNOB?

That would be my response. That, and responding to everything they said to me with 'I don't believe you!' for ooh, at least a fortnight.

Cut these twats off OP ... they're hideously rude ... honestly who do they think they are 😳

you really don't need people like that in your life 🌺

Are you sure it’s not just an expression/turn of phrase? It is in Ireland....like saying ‘no way, that’s mad!’.

Is it another way of saying ‘wow! Seriously? Well, I never!’

I have found that pausing and then saying 'Ah, right' while gazing at people blankly is quite effective against this sort of asshatery (and is very funny as they often have no idea what to do in response)

@wibblewombat

They are pressing your buttons.

Drop the rope.

This.

I'd honestly just respond "fine" and drop it. There's nothing to be gained from prolonging that kind of exchange.

I think people are bored and stuck for meaningful conversation at the moment.

My exH
‘Do you know where X is’
No
‘You must do’
Well I don’t
‘Of course, you don’t’

Except about absolutely everything. I used to scramble around trying to justify myself. Took me a long time to realise that saying ‘ah well’ stops the conversation.

I agree with some of the other posters that it’s not that they don’t believe you it’s more a turn of phrase like “well I never”

It's not a turn of phrase, it's them telling me that they don't believe me.

Do you shower?
Yes.
I don't believe you.
Why not?
Because I don't, no one does that.
Lots of people shower every day.
No they don't.

And so on.

I'm not sure it's a people thing. I think it's a thing some very unusual people do who you know. I've never come across this. It's really fucking weird. Is it friends or family who do this?

You know odd people, people who are clearly quite dirty

Take no notice, and then...write some crazy threads in Mumsnet, the more outrageous the better....

Everyone will believe you, and you’ll make the front pages of a newspaper

It is fucking weird. I don't do this to other people because it's rude.

I'd never tell someone that I didn't believe something something they said they did in private.