When i found womens underwear in my DH's glove box i thought he was having an affair, but i have found out that is much worse than that.

[howdoihandlethis]

Ok i am a long timer i know about grapes tablecloths and JFlounce.
i have had to name change for this as i don't want to be indentified.
My DH has been acting oddly and has been very distant with me for a few months, i suspected that he was having an affair and have being snooping around. on looking in his car glove box i found several pairs of ladies undies and a couple of bras.
tonight i have confronted him with the evidence and he very tearfully told me that he isn't having an affair but that he likes to wear ladies undies, how do i handle this, i am in shock, he has gone out and i don't know if i want him to come back.

He maybe didn't want you to have ones as nice as him?

Come on... when I buy gifts I don't buy something nicer than I have

Glad you think it is funny.

all sorts of questions running throu my head

Of course they were "nice"

There is a transvestite shop in London where you aren't allowed to say you want to dress up slutty, because they will tell you "We don't have tarts in here, only ladies"

How do you know that MP?

questions like "what size is he?" and "will they fit me"?

so how come he buys me crap yet he buys himself nice stuff

well he is a bit bigger than me around the waist, but the bras are my size.

maybe he thinks you like the slutty look??

have you told him what you like?

because he is a lady

What is the problem? The fetish? The gayness? Or the low quality of the polyester drawers he buys you?

you can do swapseys with the bras then

what, even the cup size? He has moobies too then?

oh shit, lady up the road was telling me the other day at the school gates that she had had some washing stolen from her clothes line, oh shit.

you are RUBBISH at this

was she the same size as you as well?

so he
LOVES DRESSING UP INLADIES UNDIES
IS UNSURE ABOUT HIS SEXUAL PREFERNCES
STEALS LADIES DRAWERS

This is one confused man

You clearly need more practice on being a believeable troll.

Now sit in the corner and write your lines!

lol, it's trie MP, she is RUBBISH at this. but a nice try to lighten the mood.

Yup, he shags other women and then stuffs their underwear in his glove compartment!

Or, he gets changed in his car in full view of passing motorists.

you dont have to be understanding straight away but would you not rather that than sleeping with another woman i know what i would prefer its something you can both know behind closed doors you just need to make sure he doesn't want to take it further as in sex change

but even if you cant handle the thought right now he hasn't been unfaithful he has been untruthful but for a reason he dont want to lose you and rightly so your already stating you sont know if you want him to come back

this man clearly loves you to have done this in secret as he's not wanted to lose you tell him its ok to do this in moderation behind closed doors many couples do weird and wonderful things together to highten sexual arouseness he is still your caring loving husband try to be there for him and if you really cant be honest straight away good luck

lol @ MP

She's right

Come out, come out, whoever you are....

Can't help with the OP

(Just as an aside though, can someone please explain to a complete innocent, why would a man having an affair have undies in his glove box? Is it a trophy thing? Doesn't the woman get dressed again after the deed? Sorry, perhaps I should start a new thread but I have never understood that.)

this is not beyond the relms of possibility. I have a friend whose husband told her after 8 years of marriage that he thought he was a transvestite, started dressing up, and then progressed within weeks to deciding that he was actually a transexual. The marriage actually didn't end until he (she?) decided that she wanted to start seeing other men. My friend was totally destroyed by it and three years on is still finding it hard to rebuild her life.

If you are for real, I would sit down and have a serious discussion with your dh. If he is genuinely having doubts about his sexuality then he is going through a very difficult time right now and needs support not ridicule. It might be worth both of you going for some counselling to help come to terms with this.

Also it's important to ensure that you are safe. If he's been visiting gay clubs then you need to be sure he hasn't been intimate with anyone and to be sure that he's ok healthwise iyswim.