Im ready for walking out on my DH. We have been together for 30 years, since I was 19. We have two beautiful children who are my world and we are both extremely proud of them. Our marraige was good and to the outside world we probably look perfect but I am so, so unhappy and miserable 😞
My DH does nothing to help me and I mean NOTHING! He never has but Ive put up with is cos thats what you do but I cant take it any longer. He has promised to change many times over the years but of course it has never happened.
I have a demanding full time job and do all the cooking, cleaning, washing DIY (although so much needs done to the house I cant keep up), dog walking, you name it, its down to me. Any jobs at home he has started hes not finished. He gets up 10 mins before we need to leave for work...im up 2 hours prior to that to get kids sorted and when we come home at night I dont sit down til about 8.30. We have no social life, we dont see friends, we do nothing together. We dont make any plans for the future. Theres no intimacy and have not had sex since December and before that I couldnt tell you last time. If we have a few drinks at weekend he sits in a different room. He lies in late at weekends which for me are spent with more housework one day and the next housework and shopping for my elderly parents. Nothing gets done while Im out and I come home to a bigger mess to sort out.
Once I was an outgoing bubbly person and now i find myself full of anger and resentment and the life being slowly sucked out of me. Ive been struggling to make even small talk recently. I told him last week I was very unhappy and he said nothing. No questions asked. Next day he sent me a text to say he will change but not one thing has improved. Although i think he may have thrown a pizza in the oven for the kids one night.
Ive put up with it for sake of the kids but i know think it is more damaging. They are asking me if im ok more often although i try to be ok around them but they must feel the tense atmosphere.
He is a nice guy a great dad and I care for him but no longer love him and dont think I can put up with another 20/30 years of this. Am I being selfish for putting myself first for once and wanting to be happy?
Please help...my head is bursting with this 😞