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Original poster

9 year age gap?

29 replies

WhiskyExchange · 13/03/2019 19:08

Am I being stupid to consider it?

I’m a mature student, have been partnered with another student for a project. We get on really well, I enjoy his company and he’s said he enjoys mine. We’re going out tomorrow night for a drink (on a date).

He’s 24, I’m 32.

He’s quite mature so I thought he was a few years older and I look young for my age so he thought I was younger.

Now it’s the night before I’m really starting to second guess myself about the age gap. Am I kidding myself it could ever work? Should I cancel?!

OP posts:
WarIsPeace · 13/03/2019 19:10

It's only a date, you don't need to overthink it and worry about getting married yet

Have fun Grin

Sirzy · 13/03/2019 19:10

It’s very early days. Go, have fun, see what happens.

33goingon64 · 13/03/2019 19:12

Don't see the problem. Enjoy!

Original poster
WhiskyExchange · 13/03/2019 19:13

Thanks, I know it might be nothing anyway.... but if it was.

I think I feel weird about being the older woman so to speak. Older men with younger women seems more acceptable somehow.

OP posts:
augustboymummy17 · 13/03/2019 19:13

I'm 25 my partner is 33 we got together when I was 21 we now have 2 children age is just a number go for it :)

iklboo · 13/03/2019 19:18

DH is 8 years younger than me. We met when I was 30, got together properly two years later.

ffiffi8 · 13/03/2019 19:21

I met my fiancé at uni when he was 21 and me 31, we now have a house and baby on the way ... We were friends for a while first and just fell in love 😊 9 & 1/2 years between us 😊 incidentally my mother and stepfather met at same ages... 20 years later still going very strong 😊

Original poster
WhiskyExchange · 13/03/2019 19:23

Thank you all. It’s good to hear of success stories from similar ages. I’ll try to stop worrying and just enjoy it for what it is - I think first date nerves are getting to me!

OP posts:
ffiffi8 · 13/03/2019 19:28

Honestly it all depends on the people involved, I'm quite young for my age and he's quite old for his... both on looks and personality.

Enjoy it for what it's is Smile

Dillyson · 13/03/2019 19:30

My DH is 10 yrs younger than me. We've been married for 20 years and together for 22.
Age is just a number.

Easterbunnyiscomingsoon · 13/03/2019 19:31

I was 41, dh was nearly 31. No issues at all.

GlitterPixie · 13/03/2019 19:35

I’m 6 years older than DH it’s not an issue at all

Bezalelle · 13/03/2019 19:53

I'm 9 years older than my DP and it doesn't cause any issues!

DuchessOfPhysics · 13/03/2019 20:22

It also depends what you're looking for.

WhoKnewBeefStew · 13/03/2019 20:27

There is a 9 year age gap between me and my dh and it’s not an issue. But we both have dc before we met. The only time I’d see it being an issue, is if he had dc, and didn’t want any more, and you didn’t, and did want them.

But as it’s a first date then go for it.

CrispbuttyNo1 · 13/03/2019 20:31

I'm 50, my DP of five years is 36. We have an amazing relationship. Never had a really bad argument and have just bought a house together.

Original poster
WhiskyExchange · 13/03/2019 20:35

Thanks everyone for all the replies.

Neither of us have any children. I would like children. His best friend has just had his first child and he talks about having his own too, I guess the only issue could be timing if he wanted to wait a while first.

OP posts:
CrispbuttyNo1 · 13/03/2019 21:00

You are still young. Plenty of time.

newnameyawn · 13/03/2019 21:04

Nothing to worry about OP. My DH is nearly 13 years younger than me and we met when I was 35 and he was 23. He was mature for his age! Good luck and enjoy Smile

PissOffPeppa · 13/03/2019 21:06

9 years is nothing! As long as you’re compatible and are after the same things in life, I’m sure you’ll be just fine.

sleepalldays · 13/03/2019 21:06

I'm a 20 year old (woman) & my boyfriend is 35. We've been going strong for 2 years! Go for it :)

sazzle27 · 13/03/2019 21:14

I'm 26 and my DP is 39.. don't notice the age difference until writing it, or someone asks.. he looks you ger and I'm mature..

The best example of a couple I knew was one where she was 18 years older then her husband. So so happy, well suited and loved life!

Age is just a number - if youre happy then go for it!

whatamidoingwithmylife · 13/03/2019 21:40

After always going for older men, I ended up with someone 5yrs younger. He's far more mature than anyone I've been out with before and that's what matters, not the actual age.

If he's mature and what you're looking for, go for it :)

The only issue we've had so far is that he's at a different place regarding marriage and kids. This could end up being a big problem but I'll have to wait and see.

Original poster
WhiskyExchange · 13/03/2019 21:44

Thanks everyone, good to hear lots of positive stories. Will see how it goes tomorrow!

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 14/03/2019 01:26

It's really down to how you feel about it.

I find that some older female partners can feel insecure as the years go by. It might not be as noticeable to begin with.

If it's about having fun... go for, but the chances of a 24 year old student wanting to settle down and have a family anytime soon aren't that high. Not impossible though