I'm so tired, just so tired of it all. I love my baby I love him so much, but I don't know how much longer I can put up with all the bull shit and mind fuck.
To the world my dress sense says I'm intelligent and confident, underneath those are a trail of marks which say different. One on my arm, another to match the other arm, trail on my thigh, bums a new place, missed the face this time but got the head, hair will cover that.
I'm a slag, a bitch, a cunt, fat, idiot,my mother is a bitch, no wonder I'm the same. I just opened my legs.
I think I'm going insane I doubt and question my own ability. I want my baby to have what I never. I'm so tired of being made to feel like shit, being treated like shit, have all my confidence chipped away little by little. Every few days argument then fight, fresh new bruises before the old ones are even healed. Sick of having to wear long sleeves and not being able to take cardi off.
I'm tired, I'm just so tired. It doesn't even hurt any more. My heart just aches. I'm sorry for not being good enough. I'm sorry for not being a good mother im sorry