Anon Facebook

[DianaP86]

:(

I've had a Facebook message from an anon account with screenshots of a conversation between my DF and another woman.
Conversation is sexual and points to them having a sexual relationship previously while we have been together.

I haven't said anything to my DF as of yet. I don't know what to do.

Background, been together 11 years. 5 YO DS.

Sorry what is DF? is that your partner? are their dates on the messages? Have you had any suspicions about him having an affair?

Sorry, Fiancé.

No dates but it was definitely recent, I can tell from some of the things they were chatting about.

What are you actually asking?

I imagine the messages are probably genuine and I imagine there's a high chance that it is the other woman who has sent them to you.

So I guess it's time to kick the bastard out and take it from there.

Sorry my post came across as harsh, I didn't mean it like that. Tell us more, has he a history of this, did you have any suspicions? I'm sorry this is happening to you. It sucks.

So sorry, it’s bloody gobsmacking when you see something like this, did you have any idea?? Have you said anything??

I don't really know what I'm asking. I'm in shock of what I've just been reading.
I guess do I flip my lid, kick him out now or remain calm for now, message back, try and find out more details.

No I have never had any suspicions.

The messages are sexual, about meeting up soon and about how he fell for her before but stepped away as he is in a relationship!

😡😡😡

I’m not sure why they’ve bothered with anonymity, clearly they must be from the other person.

Personally, I’d be addressing it with my partner right away but I know the MN advice is to get your ducks in a row first.

Oh god OP you must be in shock.

I'd give yourself some time to process it before making a decision.

Do you think someone could be doing this maliciously or is it going to be genuine?

Send it to him without any accompanying text and let him come to you with an explanation. Watch him silently while he is trying to wriggle out of this shit. He will probably blame that woman for setting him up.

Sorry, what an awful experience for you.
I don’t know what to say. Only you can decide what to do next.
Personally I’d be packing his bags right now, no matter how much I loved him as I could never trust him again.
Easier said than done though! for you

Im so angry but in shock. I think they are genuine because some of the things he's saying, sounds like the things he says and does. His picture is next to the messages like they are on Facebook, but I don't see why they have come from an anon account when he says her name about 5 times throughout the conversation... why go to the effort of creating a fake account when it is going to give it away that it's you.

Is he acting strange? Ow is doing this out of spite. He may have tried to ended it. Get your facts and get ready to turf that bastard out.

Have you figured out who the OW is? Send her a private message?

It looks like they haven't spoken or seen each other for a while - he started the conversation and he's saying he misses her.
I keep reading it over and over. It's making me feel sick.

Maybe the woman is partnered up and it's the partner who sent you the evidence to let you know what has been going on. It's just a guess...

What's your situation? Do you own your house? Pay rent? What a creep. I'm so very sorry for you and your DD.

Hmm yes hadn't thought of that, it could well be her parter, if she has one.

I think I've figured out who she is as he only has one FB friend with that first name.

Her profile is on lock down so I can't really see much info.

I'd just forward the messages to him and wait to see what he has to say. Sadly, it sounds like this is from OW.

@ApolloniaC yes, joint mortgage.

Or is it OW making out it's a third party trying to split you up?

Can you log onto his FB?

Surely she would try and disguise her name?
Blank it out or something?

No, I don't know his password.

I'm going to message her, what should I say?

Are you sure it's her? Is her last name in the screenshot?

I'm not 100% certain no, so maybe I better not incase I start wrongly accusing someone.

Surname not there but only friend on Facebook with that first name and they were chatting via Facebook.

Also something on her intro matches with something said in the chat.

Do some googling of the name of the one you think it is. Does she have any other profiles online LinkedIn Twitter Instagram etc. See if you can find any ties to your F.