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Original poster

When did you get engaged and how did it happen?

42 replies

Youngmystery · 05/12/2017 16:55

Curious really.

I am not engaged currently. Was engaged to my ex after a large amount of begging from him, but no marriage happened thank god, he was an awful person and I managed to escape.

My current boyfriend and I have talked about marriage and that we want to be married to each other some day although not now. Some day we will get engaged, I don't mind when really, kind of feels like we kind of are but it's not 'formally' done with rings you know?

So what about everyone else?

OP posts:

Moanyoldcow · 05/12/2017 19:24

Fairly pedestrian for me!

We'd talked early on about wanting marriage and children so it was always on the cards. After we bought our first flat we started talking about being ready for kids. I said I wasn't willing to have children without being married so now DH said that was fine, he'd save for a ring.

I kind of ruined the planned proposal by helpfully sending links to companies that do reasonably priced diamonds. Eventually he told me he'd been bluffing as he'd already had my ring designed and made and was picking it up that week.

He met me from work, gave me my ring and we bought some champagne and went home and told everyone.

Very low key but I really didn't want an extravagant proposal so all worked out well in the end.

MissConductUS · 05/12/2017 19:24

We just talked about it and both agreed that it was what we wanted to do, then we went ring shopping. I know, kind of unromantic but I was fine with it.

BahFriggingHumbug · 05/12/2017 19:30

I was 19 and pregnant, we discussed that we wanted to be married so we went to the register office, gave notice and fixed the next available date, and that was it.no big fuss or drama

GummyGoddess · 05/12/2017 19:32

We got engaged after booking our wedding venue and planning our joint pre wedding party.

Didn't need to get engaged with a ring but dh came home late one day and had brought me snack food. Not unusual but he was acting very strangely. Then he proposed with a ring while looking slightly panicked as though I might say no Bit late then as we'd already paid the deposit for the venue.

lostpurplehoodie · 05/12/2017 19:36

We got engaged during an enormous argument. We’d been out the night before with a group of people who had been saying how stupid and pointless marriage is. DH was joining in with them and I was trying to keep a lid on how cross it was making me because I’d made it clear in the past that marriage was important to me, and he had said he agreed. The following day I brought it up and we descending into quite cross words, which culminated in DH shouting “let’s just do it then, let’s just fucking get married” which kind of stopped the argument

We calmed down and talked properly and got married 10 months later, and are pretty happy still 9years on.

RaingodsWithZippos · 05/12/2017 19:43

I was pouring a pint of Guinness behind the bar, he was calling the bingo. Suddenly he announced he had a question to ask and said "Rain will you marry me?" over the PA system. I dropped the pint of Guinness in shock and then was ushered towards the microphone to answer, said yes and we got a standing ovation. It was toe curlingly embarrassing but typical of DH, he's spontaneous. 18 years on from that day we are still crazy about each other!

HarrietKettleWasHere · 05/12/2017 19:45

3 weeks ago, 3 years together. Met on Tinder!

Took me to my favourite ancient cosy pub for Sunday lunch. Soppy bugger made a little photo story book that I flicked through and there was a space at the end to add to the story if you see what I mean. I was going through it oblivious saying 'oh, that's nice' 'ooh, that was a good day!' Etc etc. Got to the end and he was on the floor with the ring then the bar lady came over with champagne he'd left behind the bar.

If it'd have been on television or a film people would have noticed and clapped but everyone remained steadfastedly eating their roast dinners and even look up

We then invited some friends there and and got a bit smashed on prosecco after having polished off all the champagne

MissConductUS · 05/12/2017 19:49

he announced he had a question to ask and said "Rain will you marry me?" over the PA system.

This sort of public proposal was the rage in the states for a while, with people doing them at football matches on live television broadcasts. I've always felt badly for the woman - what if she's not sure, or is sure and the answer is "no"? It certainly puts her on the spot.

Scribblegirl · 05/12/2017 19:51

It was the day we bought our first flat. We'd exchanged on the Wednesday but went up on Saturday morning to pick up the keys. I was being an absolute dick because in my dreams this was going to be mega romantic - and he was being quiet and seemed a bit pissed off about the whole thing. So I gave him a massively hard time all the way from the estate agents to the flat for 'ruining the biggest thing we've done yet by being all moody'. We got to the flat and it looked awful - it was the middle of summer and one of the damp carpets had decided to start growing mould. I'd promised to him that I was going to let it go and we would enjoy our first day as home owners so I kept quiet. We went to open the bottle of champagne we'd bought along and just before I opened it he told me to stop and kneeled down in his shorts on the mouldy carpet what he said stays between us but I was sobbing the second I realised what was happening we had a lovely 5 mins on that mouldy carpet in a dodgy south London flat before our builder turned up to check out the space before he started on the Monday 😂

We vamoosed up to the pub (it was a gorgeous hot day) and sat in the beer garden for a couple of hours with a pint just grinning at each other. Called his mum and had her squeal down the phone at us. Then went home (we were living with my parents temporarily) told my parents and we made a quick reservation at a local Italian and went out for a celebratory meal and a few drinks that night. He'd proposed with a cheap ring so we could pick out the real deal ourselves a few weekends later in the Jewellery Quarter in Birmingham; had another lovely weekend three weeks later with MIL when we went to get the real deal.

Getting married in 8 months and whilst I'm moaning about a lot of the admin, I'm quietly ecstatic about the prospect of being his wife

Oysterbabe · 05/12/2017 19:56

We went on a weekend away to the Christmas markets in Berlin. He dropped to one knee under the Brandenburg gate and asked me in German. It was very romantic, it was beautiful there with the Christmas lights. We didn't hang around and got married a few months later.

Oysterbabe · 05/12/2017 19:57

Oh and we'd been together around 18 months.

FluffyFerrets · 05/12/2017 21:00

Just as I was preparing to go to bed last Christmas eve, well Christmas morning technically. He got down on one knee, had champagne hidden in the back of the fridge :) I made some funny screechy sound and almost broke his neck from hugging him that tight as I said yes :) :)
I had no clue he was going to do it.
We had spoke about it early on in the relationship, we both have never been married before despite both having a few LTR.
We marry next September, 3 years and 2 months after we got together :)

Blahblahblahzeeblah · 05/12/2017 21:02

My DH always joked that he thought 3 years was an ideal time to date before getting engaged. Lo and behold, just before our 3 year anniversary we went and holiday and he proposed on our first night there, in private in our hotel room.

SnowBallsAreHere · 05/12/2017 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

crunched · 05/12/2017 21:16

Harriet unmumsnetty tears in my eyes now!
As for me, DH kind of made sure of the answer in front of the airing cupboard as we moved into our first (rented) flat together and then got down on one knee on Valentines Day a day later in our local steak pub since he knew the answer would be yes! Married 18 months later...

Pinkpillows · 05/12/2017 21:19

Very romantic he had bought me flowers made me dinner, took me out in the car proposed to me on a beach

Turned out he was the most evil bastard you'd come across and biggest mistake of my life

gingerbreadmam · 05/12/2017 21:26

I was enjoying this until pink that's awful pink. I hope you are in a much better place now he sounds horrible.

laketaupo · 05/12/2017 21:27

In the Maldives on a sandbank at sunset a year after we first met in Café Nero with my 10 month old 💍
(Disclaimer : I had chosen the ring , booked the holiday, reminded him that we would be on holiday during our first anniversary).

No date set as dm is terminally ill and nearing the end and have just had baby DS (currently in hospital with meningitis).

PNGirl · 05/12/2017 21:29

It was our third anniversary and two weeks before the end of our fourth and final year at Uni. Boyfriend suggested a day in York so we got the train down from Durham. He proposed on the city walls in the rain having convinced me to sit rather bemusedly down on a wet bench! That was 10 years ago and 3 years later to the day we got married.

RaingodsWithZippos · 05/12/2017 21:31

miss it was a huge risk, I could have said no and then he would have looked stupid. I was more horrified at the thought of having to speak into the mike than anything else, but at least it's a story to tell the grandchildren! I certainly never imagined having such a public proposal. We hadn't spoken about marriage but he says now that he was sure I would say yes, and wanted it to be memorable.

TieGrr · 05/12/2017 21:33

DP and I are approaching three years together and also about to get the keys of our first house. Getting hopeful now... 😂

Hillbillyhotel · 05/12/2017 21:35

Ive loved reading all these We went on a break to Florence after four months together. My now DH proposed on the Ponte Vecchio (over the River Arno),picked my ring together from the Ponte Vecchio and found out a week later that I was pregnant-my DS,named Arno. It's our third wedding anniversary next week and we now have a DS too.

Chocness · 05/12/2017 21:39

On my birthday in Venice, it was very romantic. Knew something was up as we had gone out for dinner to celebrate my birthday and during cocktails he forgot to toast ‘Happy Birthday”. Also was a bit odd during dinner and very quiet. When we got back to the hotel i went to the bathroom. When I popped out the silly sausage was down on one knee with a ring. Looking back it does make me chuckle. Married a year later and getting stronger each year (married for 7, together 11 years).

Charmatt · 05/12/2017 21:40

We were both 20 and had been together 3 years but both still lived at home with our respective parents. We had booked to go away together and two days before he came to see me and was visibly upset. I asked him what the matter was and he told me he had planned to propose when we were away but his mum didn't want him to because she wanted him to wait until she was ready for him to leave her. I said he should decide what to do but be assured that if she made this decision for him, she'd want to make every decision for the rest of his life. He had a difficult 2 days with his mum says some truly awful things to him but still bought the ring he knew I'd love and asked me as he had planned. We married 2 years later and are still together 22 years on. His mother has been difficult at times in ways that have stretched my ability to be the better person but it's fair to say he cut the apron strings at 20 and it was the right thing to do!

oldlaundbooth · 05/12/2017 21:41

I said to DH we should get married as I was sick of fannying around long distance dating.

He said OK.

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