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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is this normal men's behaviour?

63 replies

Ellona · 26/10/2017 13:55

I'm 28 years old and have been in a relationship for 6years although we split for 6months and have recently got back together.

I found a message saying there is loads of hot girls at his work place and he would do stuff with most of them.

Is this lads banter as they were both talking like this?
Please be thoughtful in your advice as I do love him n other then this we have had no problems since getting back together

OP posts:
DoubleDinghyRapids · 26/10/2017 18:12

My brother works in a large call centre and there’s been two men lose their jobs over “banter” like this. One after a woman heard a man saying she needs a good fucking and he’d happily oblige and rather Than apologise he complained that she needs a sense of humour. Another after a man sent an email to some if the other men asking which female in the office they thought could take a full cock in their mouth. Most of the men who received that email reported the bloke, and again, twat argued people need sense of humour and the men who reported him are cucks.

One man telling his friend he likes Janet from accounts and would like to spend time with her outside of work is a world away from one man telling his mates he fancies Janet so much he wants to bend her over the copier and give her a good slagging, and his mates the saying yeah, they’d bend her over too and discussing if she’d take it up the arse?

No thought to how Janet would feel about wanting to be able to go to work without worrying her colleagues are discussing which orifice they want to stick their penis in. Funny thing is, men like OPs dp who think it’s funny banter can’t see funny side if their wife behaves the same way.

OP would he find it’s normal banter to read you and your friends discuss how wet Tim from next door but one makes you and how you’d love to give him a bj and how your friend would ride him like a horse? If not, why not?

Ellona · 26/10/2017 19:16

Tbf to him I know he wouldn't say this to a women at work, he is quite shy and we have always had the saying in our relationship you can look but not touch

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 26/10/2017 19:23

He wouldn't say it to a woman? So he knows it is inappropriate.

serialcheat · 27/10/2017 02:07

90% Do

10 % are gay, cucks or asexual.

serialcheat · 27/10/2017 02:28

Don't many women in mainly all female work environments behave in a similar manner !?

I've worked the doors for men only and women only strip shows.

I can testify that female audiences are far more leery !!!

KarateKitten · 27/10/2017 05:18

Serial I can honestly say I've never heard any woman in a work environment classifying some or most of the men around them as potential bait. It's very disrespectful and demeaning to look around you like that at other groups of people. A crush on someone is different to seeing so little value to a whole set of people you'd fuck any of them.

I don't think a strip show is a place for people to treat the sex on display with respect. I don't know what kind of behaviour you expect in that environment.

category12 · 27/10/2017 07:49

"random conclusions about things"? Hmm Such as?

I'm betting on suspecting him of cheating.

TammyswansonTwo · 27/10/2017 10:15

Nope serial, women don't talk like this. And they don't classify respectful men as "cucks" either. It's legitimately pathetic. You're getting some shitty info from somewhere. Maybe your own way isn't such a good way to go?

Ellona · 27/10/2017 10:55

SERIALCHEAT I do agree women talk like this as I used to work which was mainly women employees.
This is why I asked if it is normal behaviour as I understand both sexes can be like this.

OP posts:
serialcheat · 27/10/2017 16:13

Karate kitten

I agree with you to some extent. I have worked security at a number of strip shows for both male and female audiences. I don't attend them in my spare time, I have the faintest interest but conversely, I don't judge those that do.

But peer or tribal groups of both men AND women show some pretty sordid behaviour in these circumstances, especially when copius amounts of alcohol are consumed.

Working security ( I am an engineer by day, with a good degree ), by default, you have to be both a people watcher and a behavioural student.

I can tell you this from many, many experiences.

The male punters are not allowed anywhere near the girls apart from maybe a plant ( The strippers boyfriend or partner in the audience ), to drive the show.

However, I have seen countless middle aged women have sex with the oiled up Adonis', ranging from fellatio to bareback vaginal and anal sex in front of their friends. At the end of the night they go home to their husbands and children.

So yes, some woman do view attractive, fit young men as pieces of meat.

It depends on the environment, the social context, and as mentioned, peer groupings and alcohol play a massive part in lowering inhibitions and personal standards of decency.

When many groups of professional women transition from the work environment to the ' party environment ', they can be as bad AND worse than men.

serialcheat · 27/10/2017 16:15

' I don't have the faintest interest in strop show's '

serialcheat · 27/10/2017 16:16

That should read ' strip '

Ellona · 27/10/2017 16:44

I've never been to one but I wouldn't say no to both gender strip clubs(first time for everythin n all).

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