Is my DP actually gods gift to the office

[lilathewerewolf]

Posted on AIBU but maybe it's more a relationshis thing, I am just getting bloody fed up of my DP moaning that he's better than everyone else at work and miles more competent and his manager doesn't appreciate him enough and if he isn't a regional manager by so-and-so time then he'll leave and that will show them all?

I don't deny that he works hard, he's just not the be all and end all fountain of knowledge he seems to think he is. Getting a bit narked off with all the moaning to be honest. Tell me I'm being a cow and I should sit there and nod my head and stroke his ego after doing my own 12 hour shifts?

Ergh I couldn't tolerate this he sounds deranged

Big red flag. How long have you been together?

Start morning about your job too?

If he doesn't show interest or changes the subject, tell him it's not fair that only he gets to moan and it's better if neither of you are allowed to moan.

Why is it a red flag?

He sounds like a complete twat

I don’t see how it’s a red flag. He just sounds like a twat with a big ego.

Sounds miserable. We all feel under-valued sometimes but if he's like a stuck record it suggests he expects sympathy and ego boosting. Is he likely to walk out or is he just hot air?
Could be his upbringing, or part of a generally negative outlook but either way yanbu to tire of the moaning. (Especially if he rarely shows interest in your work).

It's a red flag because it indicates narcissism, and that is poison for any relationship. I find it hard to believe that his over-inflated ego only rears it's ugly head where his job is concerned.

How long have you been together, and what's his career history like?

If he's constantly leaving jobs/being sacked and feels it's because he's so amazing, everyone is threatened by him and has a vendetta, it's a huge red flag.

Do you work in the same place? Perhaps he really is the tits??

I suspect his manager feels he is a lot less capable than your husbands feels he is, which is causing this resentment he is feeling. I’d ptobably urge him to start thinking about what he needs to do to get the job he wants, to have a plan, behaving like a little bitch isn’t going to get him there.

I agree with people who say that he needs to go for promotion if he is so wonderful. But I also agree that people who are always blowing their own trumpets are complete pains in the arse.

Usually the ones who think they’re gods gift are the complete opposite.

So he has no respect or appreciation for any of his colleagues yet he thinks he's management material? Uhm, OK! He may be good at his job but neither you nor us have any way of knowing that. With his attitude though, it's fair to assume he's not a team player and that is as, if not more, important than competence.

Maybe just have a chat with him about it? Or start moaning in return, he might get the message!

Husband-related posts seem to always result in 'leave the bastard', 'he's a twat' etc no matter how everyday the problem. If I were you I'd just ignore those posters, this sounds like a perfectly reasonable relationship problem that can be rectified without such drastic Mumsnet measures, I'm sure your husband isn't a twat, we can all be annoying at times.

I think Aquamarine says it's a red flag because there are a lot of threads about where DH's piss about, changing job every five minutes because they are so brilliant and no one understands this and their manager hates them even though they couldn't do the job without them, etc etc.

The DH is nearly always a flake, who says things just like the OP's. And it always seems to end badly for the DW.

Is this the same bloke who claimed he was going to be manager this week but then his boss wasn't promoted after all? Maybe not but I think there are a lot of them about. Guaranteed he is not gods gift and you know it.

Would he be prepared to actually do something about it, such as raise it with his boss/go for the promotion or does he just want to moan about it? My DH is like this and I basically tell him if he's not going to do anything to change the situation (which I'll gladly support) then I'm not going to listen to him moan about it day in day out....but in nicer words :)

People like this are almost always in possession of an overinflated sense of their own importance.

They very very rarely are as good as they say they are.

Urgh, almost every office has one of these. It's not a very attractive trait, is it?

It sounds unbelievably tiresome and boring for you. There's nothing worse than listening to someone being self-congratulatory. Not a pleasant or attractive quality.

How will it show them if he leaves? He'll be replaced. If he doesn't like his job he could look for something else, retrain, or apply for promotion.

You don’t sound convinced. Perhaps at some stage, he can wing it and get promoted beyond his ability and thus be at the level of incompetence. I can’t imagine that would be a happy place to be.

Has he got any friends? He sounds like a complete idiot if even his partner is fed up with the way he carries on.

He sounds like a bit of a twat, you sound contemptuous of him. Why are you together?