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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

He got physical I'm back

40 replies

confused84 · 27/05/2017 08:31

I posted on here a few weeks ago about my partner being abusive does anyone remember me?
Anyway to cut a long story short my friend who was going to help me let me down on the day and he never left. I couldn't come back to the forum because he took a week off and I couldn't risk posting back on here.
He was ok after the last incident but last night he kicked off again about my phone came out of nowhere tried to smash it up again.
I stood up to try and stop him and he pushed me over luckily the sofa was behind me but it still was a shock he's never physically touched me before.
He's gone to work but I need to get him out today . Is it assault if the sofa wasn't there I would of went flying he did it very hard.
He tried to be nice after and went and got me some food and tried to act like nothing happened an hour later despite throwing my phone across the room and stamping on it and pushing me over.
Want him to go today what if hits me next time he's a massive bloke I was scared

OP posts:
randomuntrainedcuntowner · 27/05/2017 08:34

Yes. Call the police.

mummytime · 27/05/2017 08:35

Contact the police. 101 as you are not in danger at present. I would also call Women's aid.

Cary2012 · 27/05/2017 08:36

He pushed you, that's assault.
Ditto above.
Police.

Mermaidinthesea123 · 27/05/2017 08:37

Next time he will assault you. It never gets less always more. You need to leave him and get help.

Original poster
confused84 · 27/05/2017 08:52

I wasn't even by him when he did it I was standing over the other side of the room and he came over to me and did it for no reason I wasn't up in his face in anything to justify what he did. I was shocked because I've been with him for four years and he's never physically touched me he's come close but next time it might be a punch or a slap.

OP posts:
Inertia · 27/05/2017 09:01

You need to call the police. It's their job to deal with criminals like him.

maras2 · 27/05/2017 09:10

Your friend recently said that his dreadful behaviour would escalate didn't she?
Well it has.
After reporting him to the police,contact her as she seems to know what a nasty,violent piece of shit he is.
Hopefully she can persuade you to get rid of him as you seem to take notice of her unlike the hundreds of MsNet posters who have been advising you for a very long time.
Good luck.

QuiteLikely5 · 27/05/2017 09:11

Ring 101 and tell them everything. Tell them about the previous assault and the latest assault.

Only the police can protect you from DV if you don't call them you won't be safe later on when your partner returns

YoLoZammo · 27/05/2017 11:29

Please get out OP. Today. Don't delay. Take whatever you need and go to stay with your friend. Contact women's aid today and get their help. They are brilliant.

AufderAutobahn · 27/05/2017 15:36

Hi, I remember your previous thread well. Delurking to beg you to leave him, call the police and Womens Aid. Your friend doesn't sound very reliable, call the people whose job it is to get rid of arseholes like him. Please do it. Xxxxx

AufderAutobahn · 27/05/2017 15:38

Meant to say "get rid of arseholes like your partner"!

Original poster
confused84 · 27/05/2017 17:00

I haven't got anywhere to go I rang women's aid they said me and the kids can go in a hostel they aren't back till Monday now.
He came back I've packed a bag for the kids I had to hide it under their bed.
I'm going by Monday even just for a night or two till he leaves or the police make him leave . I can't face it I can't face his family he send his family when I've thrown him out before .
They all think it's my fault he's very good at twisting the situation so they all blame Me I feel like no one will believe me if I say anything they would never believe the abuse he has gone to his mothers rescue from an abusive man he's like their knight in shining amour. From the outside I can see what everyone is saying but living through it is so different.
I'm at the shop now I'm scared he's going to hit me or physically assault me now and I can't live like that in fear cos that's how I feel in fear of my safety now he's pushed me flying so he isn't going to stop there.
I am sorry to everyone for singing from the same hymn sheet I just don't have anyone to turn to right now .

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 27/05/2017 17:03

Call the police! RIGHT NOW.

Original poster
confused84 · 27/05/2017 17:07

Like I said I have been here before and he sits outside in his car up the road and watches my house he even had other people drive past to check on me too.

OP posts:
midnightswirls · 27/05/2017 17:20

I've been in an abusive relationship and i got out before it was physical. I'm sorry but its only going to get worse. A push will eventually turn into a punch and as you said he did it for no reason. This guy is DANGEROUS! Do not give him any indication your leaving. Make sure that bag is well hidden so he doesnt see it. The most dangerous time is when you are leaving. Can you go to the council and say you've been made homeless by fleeing domestic abuse? By law they have to put you into emergency accommodation.
I understand how hard it is to leave. It took me a few times. Maybe a refuge would be a good idea for you?

Dawndonnaagain · 27/05/2017 17:25

Call the police. If you tell them about him sitting in the car at the top of your road and having friends watch you, they'll probably hang on to him for 24 hours. That means you can get the locks changed or get somewhere safe whilst he's in custody. Call them now.

picklemepopcorn · 27/05/2017 17:56

Didn't you say it is your house? Get a friend to stay over with you, lock him out. Tell the police. Please.

Did you say last time your brother would help?

Original poster
confused84 · 27/05/2017 18:39

I can't go on anymore I just can't I don't wanna be here he just started again and I'm trapped in the house.

OP posts:
NoCureForLove · 27/05/2017 18:46

THEN CALL THE POLICE!

ptumbi · 27/05/2017 18:50

Why aren't you doing what you have been advised?

You asked for advice - it is CALL THE POLICE!

They will HELP YOU! THEY CANNOT HELP YOU UNTIL THEY ARE PHONED AND KNOW THE SITUATION!

AufderAutobahn · 27/05/2017 18:57

Please call the police now, not just for your sake, he will hurt your children too. Do it.

loveyoutothemoon · 27/05/2017 19:24

Call the police.

Has he locked you in?

redrobinblue · 27/05/2017 21:02

Hope you're ok OP.

YoLoZammo · 28/05/2017 01:43

OP, please come back and let us know you are OK.

CalmItKermitt · 28/05/2017 01:45

Did you call the police?