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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Meme on fb - how true do you think it is?

37 replies

PopFizz · 08/09/2016 19:51

It was posted by a site with "man's world" or similar in its name, for domestic abuse awareness month

Just didn't sit right with me, not the 53% bit, I'm well aware men are abused, but the "70% initiated by women?"

Meme on fb - how true do you think it is?
OP posts:
Eminybob · 08/09/2016 19:54

So is it saying that in 17% of cases the victims are women, but they initiated it. So it's their fault Hmm

Gardencentregroupie · 08/09/2016 20:00

Seems like bollocks to me, seeing as a woman is 3 times as likely to be murdered as a result of DV than a man. (Though I do not doubt that some men are victims of DV, and I expect F on M DV is very underreported, as it's not very 'manly' to admit a woman has hurt you physically.)

gettingtherequickly · 08/09/2016 20:03

Is it a very odd (and hideously bad) joke?

It's utter bollocks. Angry

MorrisZapp · 08/09/2016 20:03

I would imagine the majority of men being physically abused by their partners are gay.

Original poster
PopFizz · 08/09/2016 20:07

It didn't seem like a joke. It seemed to be getting spread and shared. The graphics are good and I can see the need to raise awareness, but the figures and stats just seem bollocks?

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 08/09/2016 20:09

53% of dv victims are men?
Bollocks

Feminazi · 08/09/2016 20:12

I often hear this 'fact' when discussing feminism.

The thing is, these things are impossible to research for obvious reasons, so it is hard to argue back!

McBassyPants · 08/09/2016 20:14

morris why the fuck would you assume that?! How homophobic and damn right sexist can you be?

I have no idea where those figures are from but the majority of DV against men goes unreported, so I can only assume they're speculative towards how high it may actually be against men

sentia · 08/09/2016 20:17

I think it's bollocks.

www.refuge.org.uk/get-help-now/what-is-domestic-violence/domestic-violence-the-facts/

"The 2001/02 British Crime Survey (BCS) found that there were an estimated 635,000 incidents of domestic violence in England and Wales. 81% of the victims were women and 19% were men. Domestic violence incidents also made up nearly 22% of all violent incidents reported by participants in the BCS (Home Office, July 2002)."

sentia · 08/09/2016 20:18

I get the point about unreported incidents, but that goes for female victims as well.

ineedamoreadultieradult · 08/09/2016 20:21

I went to a session with a counsellor from Mind as I felt I wasn't in control of my anger (was never violent though just felt a bit out of control) She told me most female DV victims wanted the man to hit them and would push and push until they did so they could then play the 'victim' card. With 'professionals' like this we have no chance!

DallowSpicerPinkieCubitt · 08/09/2016 20:22

Mcbassy I'm quite sure Morris said that because most violence is committed by men.

It's not sexist to state facts and crime figures

MalodyandJim · 08/09/2016 20:23

Ah, this was made by one of those men's rights groups I think.

I don't think the precious poster was
Being homophobic. She was staying a fact, men are more likely to commit DV. So the victims probably go women by men, men by men, men by women.

And my ex partner was a victim of DV by his old girlfriend!

delboysfileofax · 08/09/2016 20:26

Domestic violence is one of the most gendered crimes there is, almost always male on female. Domestic abuse more of a 60/40 split. Even then the statistics are massively skewed by the bizarrely woolly definition the government has given to "domestic"

Soubriquet · 08/09/2016 20:30

I can't see that being true

Yes some men experience DV and I bet a lot of it goes unreported but that much? No chance

Original poster
PopFizz · 08/09/2016 20:31

It just scares me that things like this get reposted and reposted, shared and believed. 70% is the woman's fault? It's ok to whack her as she asked for it? And ineedmoreadult that's awful that was said to you.

OP posts:
Gardencentregroupie · 08/09/2016 20:54

MorrisZapp's post made me wonder, and this study suggests that all types of abuse are experienced at broadly similar levels in same sex female and same sex male relationships. The full study including methodology is linked at the bottom of the summary page.

Daenerys2 · 08/09/2016 21:16

75% of statistics are made up on the spot...

Daenerys2 · 08/09/2016 21:16

DV against men is widely under reported though. I think we need to acknowledge that.

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 08/09/2016 21:25

Yes some men experience DV and I bet a lot of it goes unreported but that much? No chance

^^This.

sentia · 08/09/2016 21:32

Lots of domestic violence against women is unreported as well. I think we also need to acknowledge that.

Evergreen17 · 08/09/2016 21:35

53% of victims are men but 70% of violence is initiated by women?
So there is a 17% of women that are victims but somehow accused of initiating violence?
I dont get it

sentia · 08/09/2016 21:35

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_equivalence

KatharinaRosalie · 08/09/2016 21:38

'initiated'? What do they mean, she was nagging and deserved it?

2littlepiggies · 08/09/2016 21:38

I think they put the decimal point in the wrong place. Maybe they meant 5.3% Smile