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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

So he's left

26 replies

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:28

And I'm left broken hearted. We joint own a house and I "work" (something to do with tax) for his company. I get £860 a month from company and it covers everything except mortgage. I'm sure he will stop it soon and I can't afford the house. Ds is 3 and not yet entitled to any government funding for nursery until April. I have no idea what to do...I guess will have to sell....not sure if I'll need a solicitor. I have no money. Dh says the company acc is £15k in debt and his personal is £10k and that's my debt too

OP posts:

Lweji · 02/02/2016 17:33

Not so sure about that.
Do check how much he's supposed to give in maintenance for the children and possibly you if you have no other earnings.
Check how much you can get in benefits.
You need proper legal advice. Do you have any savings you could use?

Resilience16 · 02/02/2016 17:37

You will survive this. Get legal advice. You can probably claim working tax for nursery fees. Don't panic. Try citizens advice . You will get through this. A hug for you x

Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:38

No savings, just my own debt of £3500. What a mess... He always have me money, then he put me in his company to avoid tax (something to do with dividends I think) so now he gets to "sack" me and leave me high and dry. I couldn't work as my wage wouldn't cover child care. I've worked since I was 14 (cash) and have always worked. I planned to go back once ds had some funding but now I can't as I was relying on DH to pick him up after nursery

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Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:39

Sat here sobbin like a looser. I can't get working tax if I don't work

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tribpot · 02/02/2016 17:41

I think that if he's been paying you a salary rather than dividends, this is dubious in any case as you're not doing any work for the company? He would be in trouble with HMRC if caught. On the plus side, if he is paying you a salary and no dividends, you aren't a shareholder in the company with the 15K debt, which is useful.

You need to see a solicitor and I would also talk to Citizens' Advice.

Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:43

It's a salary

OP posts:

Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:45

I get the same amount each month into my acc from the company, I pay tax and NI on it....that's a salary right?

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Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 17:46

I need to find out from his accountant (who told him to do this)

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Resilience16 · 02/02/2016 17:48

You aren't a loser my chickadee.Have a good boohoo tonite and then tomorrow get working on your survival plan. First point of contact Citizens Advice as it is free x

ALaughAMinute · 02/02/2016 17:50

You need to see a solicitor to find out what your right are. You might be able to stay in the house until your youngest DC is 18 for instance.

You will get there. Be strong.

tribpot · 02/02/2016 17:55

Do you get a payslip from the company? Does it show an employers' tax and NI contribution?

Technically I would doubt the accountant will discuss the business' finances with you. I believe he has badly advised your DH in any case, unless you are actually doing something like preparing the invoices or something for the business? However, the main thing is the money is likely to disappear. Is there equity in the house?

petalsandstars · 02/02/2016 18:33

I don't think he'd be able to just sack you. There's another poster who dealt with similar duckweed front XH

petalsandstars · 02/02/2016 18:34

Gah autocorrect doesn't like fuckwittery

Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 18:42

About £100k in the house maybe a bit less. I don't get a payslip but that's because DH need to do them (and never has)

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Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 02/02/2016 18:42

I like duckweed lol

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Fairylea · 02/02/2016 18:43

Could you get a lodger or (dependent on area) provide student accommodation? Yes I know lots will say it's not ideal with a small child etc etc but when my ex left me and my then 6 month old dd it was a way of keeping our heads above water. At one point I had 4 students living with us- two in room! Just an idea.

Definitely get on to the turn to us website and use their benefit checker to see what you could be entitled to. You can play around with the figures anonymously.

Lweji · 02/02/2016 21:27

Let's see if I understand it.
He pays you 850 from which all expenses are paid, except the mortgage. Presumably he pays the mortgage from his salary. How much is his salary?

Lweji · 02/02/2016 21:30

As an employer he has to give you payslips. It could land him in trouble if you complain.
You should insist on having them.
I imagine he could make you redundant, but then he should pay you compensation too. Insist on it.

TheTigerIsOut · 02/02/2016 21:38

Seek legal advice, if the house is in the name of the company, it could be the case that you have no claim to it.

But if he has named you as an owner/shareholder of the company you may have certain rights when it comes to dividends, company assets, etc.

His debts are yours to share under certain circumstances, hence why is super important to talk to solicitor/CAB asap.

Do not even think of leaving your job, you need it more than ever, and being in work gives you access to working tax credits (inc help to pay up to 70% of your nursery costs) and other sorts of additional help.

Since has left, you can apply for support straight away (and the sooner the better as it may take a couple of moths to materialise). Start by checking your entitlements using the calculator in entitled to.org.uk

Allalonenow · 02/02/2016 21:46

Do you get a P60 in April each year? That would prove that you were an employee.

Have you got a signed employment contract? If so, what does it say about termination of contract?
Did you do anything at all for the business, type letters, buy tea bags & loo rolls, attend meetings?

Gather together as much financial information about H and his business as you can, keep it somewhere safe.

Have you got family and friends who will help you through this difficult time?

It won't be as black as it all seems at the moment.

TheFormidableMrsC · 02/02/2016 22:40

Stop stop OP, I have been in EXACTLY your shoes. I was also sacked by my husband on his leaving for OW. He didn't tell me until he'd stopped my salary. This is what happened...I went to CAB, I immediately made an application for income support, child tax credits and council tax benefit. I then had to apply for my mortgage interest to be paid. His accountant won't speak to you and as you are "sacked", you have no rights to company information. You must see a solicitor. Please please please gather every bit of financial information you can find. Bank/credit card statements, utility bills, mortgage statement, any investments etc. Make sure you have marriage certificate/passport/personal documents. Please bear in mind that if he has "sacked" you, he is acting illegally. He still has to follow company law and protocol. CAB will advise you on this too.

I am so sorry you are going through this. You can get through it, you will. There's a lot of help out there. Please also make sure you have lots of RL support

TheFormidableMrsC · 02/02/2016 22:50

Also, unless the debt is in your name, it is his debt and his alone! Don't listen to his shit. Believe me, I have got the scars to prove it. I ended up taking my husband to court, self repping, he walked away with nothing in the end. I got the house, everything. It's SO important you make an appointment with the CAB straight away, first thing tomorrow. If you take control now, you have a fighting chance of coming out of this OK. There are laws to protect you, he can say and think what he likes, but he's not above the law.

Original poster

WhoGivesAFlying · 04/02/2016 10:40

The house is not in the company name, it's in our names. I've not been "sacked", I don't have a contract but I think i did have a p60...

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JessicasRabbit · 04/02/2016 11:30

OP, use the this website: www.turn2us.org.uk/ to find what benefits you are entitled to, or speak to CAB so you can start a claim as soon as possible.

It might be worth calling your mortgage company, explaining what has happened and asking if they can give you a month's payment holiday until your claims are processed. The worst they can do is say no, but if they say yes you'll at least have some breathing room.

Finally, his debt is his own. Personal as well as company debt.

MagicalHamSandwich · 04/02/2016 11:43

This might not work at all for a whole number of reasons and I'm no legal expert but: if he 'sacks' you, can you go after him for unfair dismissal?

I'm reasonably certain that you're not allowed to fire your staff because you're no longer romantically interested in them.

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