Why do men get so angry when they've drank alcohol?

[Madandsad15]

My boyfriend after he drinks turns nasty(verbally) says he hates me and doesn't love me and hasn't for a while/only with me for the kids when he has had a drink.
Yet when he drinks with his friends he is just happy drunk and the life and soul.

Why do men do this?
What makes the nastiness start?

[Owllady]

Ahh well diddums life can be a bit boring when you have responsibility. It is when you have to grow up and realise everything isnt all about you

[Bananalanacake]

I read on here that alcohol magnifies what you really are.

[EvaBING]

He has hit me almost throttled me once on approximately 8 occasions.

I, like a gobshite, keep going back to the bastard.

I went as far as getting an order in place (similar to your non-molestation order). I fucking let him back.

My family are fucked up. I suffer with depression and am not the best with the old alcohol.

He can't go back to Ireland because he is wanted for a Section 3 assault on me (it's assault causing harm).

Meanwhile, I, come over here, for more of the same. Because my father is also an abusive cunt.

Anyway, if I survive Christmas, it will be a miracle.

And yes Bastard - if you're reading - STOP FUCKING STALKING ME!

[Wolfiefan]

Eva you are not a gobshite. But any man or woman who assaults you is.
You deserve better.
Have you a friend you can stay with? Tried Woman's Aid or Shelter or anyone that can help to keep you safe.

[EvaBING]

MadandSad - my other half is in a strop because I won't go to the shops with him.
Unable to do so by himself.
How he managed for 3 months when I was back in Ireland, I will never fathom.

[Wombatinabathhat]

Eva that is so sad. Just get out of there and away from them both.
OP You too. He's not worth it

[AnyFucker]

My husband doesn't get verbally abusive when he is drunk. He is on his Xmas do today and will come in pissed later. He will be silly and happy and talk too much but that is all.

Only nasty abusers get nasty. Do not let anyone blame alcohol for how they treat you.

[EvaBING]

No-one, nor nowhere to go. I was homeless for 3 months this year.

So, it's this cunt, or go homeless again.

Going to head back to Ireland again I think. The fear of the belting I'm going to get. I fucking just wish he'd get it over with.

Hard to figure out what to do. I can take another battering (physically). I'm not sure whether I would survive either the emotional abuse from my father, or the reality of being homeless again.

[Madandsad15]

Eva your story makes me so sad.
I am so sorry your suffering like this :-(
Nobody deserves that.
A real man wouldn't treat you like that.
I hope you get away from him and you start living your life the way you deserve.
I feel a bit silly for moaning on over nothing now.
Always people worse off.
Merry Christmas :-)

[Madandsad15]

Eva do you have any friends you can turn too?
I hope you do.
If you ever want to talk please feel free.

[We3KingyOfOblomovAre]

I don't get angry. I get lovey-Dovey. To dh or my friends.... I luuuuuuuuvvvvvv you .........

[VagueIdeas]

So he only gets abusive with you, not his mates? Well, in that case the booze is loosening his tongue and he's telling you how he really feels.

[EvaBING]

OP - my lovely DP also said that he is bored today! God bless the poor cunt.

[Lweji]

OP believe what he says. Either way he's being a bastard.

Eva, have you posted before? Maybe get to otbt? Have you contacted WA? You shouldn't have to go homeless.

[Madandsad15]

How old are you Eva?
If you don't mind me asking.
I'm 28.

[Lweji]

OP your moans deserve as much attention as any others. He is still abusing you under the cover of being drunk.

[Madandsad15]

I think this may be a case of the alcohol making him spill the truth( with my bf)
Maybe it makes Him realise I'm boring etc.

[Lweji]

He sounds like the boring one.

[Goingtobeawesome]

Eva and OP, you don't have to stay with these abusive men you know.

[ItsAllGoingToBeFine]

I think this may be a case of the alcohol making him spill the truth( with my bf)

Alcohol removes inhibitions, so when someone is drunk you can get a pretty good idea of their true character. If he's nasty when drunk, but nice the rest of the time, that probably means he's hiding his nasty side when sober.

[EvaBING]

I'm 38 MadandSad. I'm Irish, so there is not much in the way of help here. Will have to go back to Ireland.
Not sure whether getting a walloping is better than being homeless.
I hate the cold.

[Rosyglow74]

My auld granny....from Ireland Eva....used to say "A drunken man speaks a sober mind". That said, she had a saying for everything. I think she made them up as she went along.

[Lweji]

If you are in the UK you should get as much help as a UK national. Have you asked about it?

[Owllady]

I am pretty sure WA wont care what your nationality is??

[Seeyounearertime]

In my limited male experience with fellow men they'll tend to do shit to get a reaction but only of they feel they can get away with.

If he is a nasty drunk with a bloke that looked like Tyson Fury he'd likely get his head punched in, so he wouldn't get away with it so doesn't do it.
If he gets abusive and dickish with his OH..... Who keeps forgiving him?.... Then he's getting away with it and will continue to do it.

I actually think it's quite a common triat in a lot of people, men and women, they do things solely to get a reaction. Like kids I guess, pushing to see what they can get away with.

Like OPs OH, "I'm depressed and bored."
OP should have said,
"You know where the door is cock face, don't let it hit you where the good lord split you" then gone about her life as normal.
He'd either have left, problem solved, or realised OP isn't going to put up with his shite, problem solved.

That's my no cents worth.

And EVA, walk through your front door and keep going till you find your arse is somewhere much better