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Original poster

Email 'thing' going on and I feel guilty...............................

83 replies

Feelingguilty · 20/08/2006 08:26

Dh and I been married 9 years. Recently we've not been getting on so well. Always snapping at each other, too tired for sex. You've heard it all before.

Anyway a man I know through work and who goes to the same pub as me has been sending me regular emails at work and to my hotmail address, and we now email at least twice a day. Nothing sexual but quite flirty and basically just cahtting about our day. My dh does not know and he would go crazy if he found out. But it's got to teh point where I am looking forward to reading his emails and he makes me laugh so much. I can't stop thinking about him and I don't know why.

He is nothing compared to my dh to look at so why am I feeling like this? Not quite sure where these emails will end but I know he is attracted to me. He is married with children also.

Don't know why I'm typing this really, just lookimg for your opinion.

Thanks for reading.

OP posts:
Pan1 · 20/08/2006 22:21

I'd also suggest you do something about the c'm't'e thing.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 22:21

Hey - dont worry, there are so many "feelings" on this thread, im getting confused........

Original poster
feelingguilty · 20/08/2006 22:27

Don't want to leave the committee. I like it.

Can't beleive I've even started this.......don't know what to do. Don't wnat to say anything to this guy in case I've fabricated all of this, even though I haven't IYKWIM! He might be totally innocent and just emailing a 'friend' Am I making sense?

I'm thinking because it's emails it doesn't matter, but secret phone calls would be just the same I guess. Toothache is right, it is easier nowadys to get into this. I even set up a hotmail account so dh wouldn't see the emails.

God, I sound like a real jezzabel when I'm so not. Guess I like it that I know that he likes me. The other woman committee members are older and 'frumpy' ish. I ma young, slim, trendy and attractive. He's told me he is glad I am on committe otherwise it would be boring.

At the last meeting he was sending me texts during it, I felt 15 again and I liked it.

OP posts:
Pan1 · 20/08/2006 22:30

ok. Def. do something aboutthe cmte - attend less, send your contribution by another means, whatever....it doesn't sound as if you have decided to stop it.

feelinganidiot · 20/08/2006 22:30

vvv

fg, the part about 'feeling 15 again' is exactly how I described it to a couple of mates.
It has made me stop and think though where does cheating start and finish?. Does it start with a thought, or a text, or an e-mail? Thank god there isn't a 'Thoughts Police'.

LieselVonTrapp · 20/08/2006 22:30

Flirting is not a crime. You are just kind of stuck in a rut if you dont mind me saying, these things I beleive happen in marriage and you get bogged down with the humdrum of normal life and forget about the original romance and somebody else reminds you of how you used to feel.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 22:38

Change of tune LVT?

Toothache · 20/08/2006 22:42

lol

LieselVonTrapp · 20/08/2006 22:54

VVV - What?

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 22:56

"By LieselVonTrapp on Sunday, 20 August, 2006 9:45:15 PM

Sorry am I supposed to be constructive or sympathetic, or could I just not give a stuff about somebody that tried to sh*g her "best friends" dh. "

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 22:57

Sorry - im not one for carrying things from one thread to another, but, my, you've really got my goat, and thats going some for an internet sprite.

mosschops30 · 20/08/2006 22:58

sorry vvv but that is a bit different, this guy is not with fg's best friend and sh**ging is different to flirting

SherlockLGJ · 20/08/2006 23:00

There was no shagging on the other thread either, just a horrible realisation of having been had.

Sheesh, I bloody love MN.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 23:00

Well, to clarify, the poster in LVT's line of fire didnt try to shag anyone. Just seemed a bit rich to me, quite frankly, to judge so harshly on one side, and then say that.

But hey, thats just my opinion. We're all entitled, arent we?

LieselVonTrapp · 20/08/2006 23:03

Absolutely
Love you VVV

Love Piece of work

mosschops30 · 20/08/2006 23:04

yes we are, thats what mnet is for

Pan1 · 20/08/2006 23:06

Sorry LVT, you do seem to be going down the path of "hey, it happen's" -

well, no it doesn't 'happen'..we make it happen, and so can stop it as well.

It just sounds like feelingguilty is a bit of a misnomer..

she could rename herself " feeling-a-bit-guilty-but-not-enough-yet-to-actually-do-something-about-it-but-I-will-go-on-MN-and-talk-about-it-for-a-bit-and-waste-everyone-elses-time-as-well-as-my-own. There.

Toothache · 20/08/2006 23:07

LVT - she didn't shag him.

lol.. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Judgemental. F*ck me I'm glad I haven't posted for advice on MN about certain things in my past!

oldwindbag · 20/08/2006 23:09

lol toothache, I agree. Everything to do with morals and personal ethics is completely black and white of course, with no shades of grey.

LieselVonTrapp · 20/08/2006 23:09

FFS should I leave. Feelingguilty has done nothing wrong IMO - and thats all it is - My Opinion. Youre all entitled to yours as well - I just wont resort to name calling.

nightynight · 20/08/2006 23:10

funny, I take exactly the opposite line of thought to you, LVT. I thought that the poster on the other thread was much less to blame, because it was a one off incident that she didnt stop in time.

I know that Im much stricter about relationships than the average on MN, but emailing over a period of time, to another man, when you're married? way out of order imo.
Can sympathise with marriage problems, but you KNOW that the honest thing to do is sort your marriage out or quit, not sleepwalk into a "just friendly" relationship with another man.
you did ask for opinions.

SherlockLGJ · 20/08/2006 23:11

LVT

Do you promise to leave and leave quietly ??

You have added nothing to the board IMO.

oldwindbag · 20/08/2006 23:11

LVT, FWIW I agree with your comment here, just pmsl at Toothache's comment about not seeking views from MN on past 'misdemeanours'.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/08/2006 23:12

Pan, you make me larf

Pan1 · 20/08/2006 23:12

LV - "Feelingguilty has done nothing wrong IMO "..well in her opinion she says she has.....