What do to with shit kitchen with no money?

[SalvosNos]

This is our kitchen before we moved in. Those cupboards are all shit vinyl wrap and the vinyl has come off the kickboards now as we had to replace broken integrated washing machine. Was never able to get it to stay back on, so now have bare MDF kickboards.

The tiles and units are that perfect match of impossible to paint the wall a colour that's not horrible. It's all orangey terracotta awfulness.

How can we improve the kitchen with no money? We really like bright bold colours so this kitchen is the anti us. Tile stickers then deep green wall paint? Peeling off the laminate and painting? Any wisdom appreciated!

It all depends what your budget is.
Minimal would be to paint the tiles, peel off the vinyl and paint the doors, paint the walls.
A bit more, replace cupboard doors, tile over the tiles, replace worktop.

There is a paint called frenchic that is amazing for tiles and kitchen units.

Look for the Frenchic Fan Forum on Facebook. It's full of ideas.

This blog post is a great make over from a similar starting point?

www.goldisaneutral.co.uk/home/2017/9/13/7405jq33h62hqvo2cacqo5nbc3bede

I've been there, done that with the peeling vinyl and it didn't work and took ages.
I would paint over all cupboards (leave vinyl on) with a specialist paint and go dark, hoping you cover it up?
Then tile stickers on floor and wall. And white walls. Stretch to a new worktop if you can?
It's not the worst I've seen though!

Have a look at DIY ON A BUDGET on Facebook. Lots of council kitchens have been made to look great on a very small budget. There's some shockers on there too, but you will be able to find some inspiration.

Put upwith it to you do get money. (Doesn't look too bad from your picture.)

peachesforfree that kitchen makeover is great!

Hey! We're in the same boat. But yours is a whhhooole lot better than ours , I'll tell you that. It's cosmetic , really. Ours is half plastered half tiled and literally falling apart.
We are doing as is suggested above - probably painting / repairing tiles , painting doors (could replace them but it's a false economy as carcasses are pretty grim too)...
We're looking at used kitchens (ideally solid wood that we can renovate or repaint), reclaimed timber eg. Iroko for the worktops, and have plastered, painted all walls, laid new floor, added a blind and soon doing wall storage and new extractor. Total cost so far is £500 including all materials and extractor.

Ours is a lot worse now as we had to pull out useless wall cupboards as all they fit was a tiny fridge and we needed more. Currently got a few gaping holes!

Paint is around our budget. Not even sure what colours go with that floor! White cupboards, deep green walls if I paint the wall tiles?

The shocking thing is how expensive but bland many fitted kitchens are... I used to watch the 100k house and liked the architect piers Taylor's comments on this phenomenon which he writes about here www.homebuilding.co.uk/eclectic-kitchens/

I'm struggling to find any short term solution that doesn't involve £5k+ at the moment

I'd go with a soft white paint. Only thing is that your cupboards look like a creamy colour (ours are the same) which look even worse / more obvious once you change the walls. Maybe go for a creamier toned white for the walls if you can't change the cupboard doors yet? Or walls in white and doors in another colour like pale sage green?

On Marketplace on fb you can cheaply buy or get free second hand kitchen units etc. Some of them look almost new. Obviously you will need to collect and fit them etc.

Mine is worse than yours but similar style. It is wrapped, peeling off where kettles, etc. have steamed it and it is cream, however previous users fingernails have scratched the cream paint off to reveal a horrible dark green which matches the even worse dark green oven. Cheap wooden knobs and worn away cream paint around them so that the nasty green looks like dirt.

Every so often a drawer front drops off and the drawer falls apart, the bits drop into the cupboard below, or a door falls off.

We have white walls and dated white tiles, fake wood worktops and that foul pine effect plastic coated edging on the units. The floor is wood but is discoloured around the edges because someone had a big bloody rug in the centre.

Some idiot put the door in at an angle so you bash your arm when you go in and out.

Some of the appliances work which is a bonus.

Thank you for the advice! That paint looks amazing, it may be the way to go. It's going to be years until we have money.

Getting a kitchen fitted costs a fortune unfortunately so secondhand not an option.

For comparison, this is our dining room leading off the kitchen. It was similarly shit but hooray for a burst pipe and insurance money because we redid it nicer! But as you can see they don't match at all. (We are awaiting chairs and haven't put things up yet)

I’d paint the walls dark green, and the cabinets the same colour. Brass knobs on the doors. A fake Persian rug in dark rich colours.

The red tin zinsser paint will paint over virtually anything so might be good as a primer. I found it went on well with a mini roller, it is a fairly thin paint. It doesn't look quite as good but there is the option of just doing the door fronts initially and do the inside if you have money later.

Personally I’d actually go for some cheap vinyl and lay it yourself over that floor. Something dark, similar to your dining room. Local carpet shops and even eBay often have very cheap off cuts and remnants. I would then paint over the tiles in a dark green or navy. I think cupboards can often look dreadful painted over if the vinyl has started to lift. I’d live with them until I could replace them.

Zinsser red tin is amazing . We've got dark varnished wood everywhere and have primed a bay window, a large window, a small window and a bunch of skirtings with one tin. Next I'm using it to prime the kitchen tiles before painting with an ordinary eggshell. Make sure you have ventilation when you use it as it's pretty toxic though!

It's hard to say without seeing it as it is now.

My utility cupboard doors were peeling last year and eventually I pulled the vinyl wrap off and the bloke I'm seeing spray painted them (with car spray equipment and cream car paint) - they look amazingly good and I'm sure you could get a good finish with care and attention if you hand paint.

With your dark blue dining room leading off and given your preference for colour I'd try and paint the feature tiles a dark blue and do the walls the sane colour. Go with a cream for the cupboard doors to match the remaining tiles.
I think the floor would look okay with those colours and I'd leave it.

You can paint your kitchen cupboards and/or walls

Ask on freecycle or Facebook for some an old kitchen someone is taking out or for wooden door and draw front. Homebase do the cheapest worktop and sinks and taps are cheap at the builders merchants
I wouldn’t paint tiles but if they’re well stuck on you can tile over them.
If you can fit a kitchen yourself you can get a new one for about 1k.

If the units are good I would look to replace the doors on kitchen cabinets.

kitchenandbedroomdoors.co.uk/kitchen_door_designs.asp

Do not paint tiles it just looks bad

In our renovation I struggle to decide whether it's better to live with something while you save or put the effort in to updating. Because if you really have no cash then it may end up worse doing a bit of a botch job rather than leaving the whole lot til you can do it properly?