Can I draw your attention to the utter wanky-ness of this EA blurb...

[kitsmummy]

Not to mention the footballers wives stylie interior....thanks for that John and Lesley - how soon can I book a viewing?.

Yes, I think that does take the prize. I would also pay them not to decorate my house...

I can beat that for wanky estate agent blurb...

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-19493676.html

The bedrooms in my house are bigger than that 2nd property!

What is that in the "lake" of the 2nd property? And why wouldn't you take the cover off the swimming pool for the photos?????

The garden has a carpark in it? Not sure why they have left the cover on the pool unless it hasn't been maintained very well it will hide the scum I suppose. And the lake does appear to have something in it that shouldn't be there it doesn't appear to be a shopping trolley though.

I don't tend the read the EA rubbish but after seeing these two I think I will it is always good to have a laugh occasionally. Lets' ask the people that live there who are trying to get out of the property for their opinion because that will be the truth won't it?

I can promise you that somewhere there is an interior designer laughing all the way to the bank....

Buy my house! Look, there's a car park in my garden! And a dead whale in the swimming pool! And a UFO in the pond!

Loving the blurbs.

For a second I thought I recognised the 2nd one. It's very similar to a friends who live in that area and they have a car park for their guests, as in 100s of them!

"Living here has been everything we thought it would be" says Lesley. Nonsense! No-one actually lived in that house, it was definitely constructed as a film set for the modern-day version of Dynasty!

And it's in a really wierd place too, Lesley's house, a village that is basically a crossroads on a big main road, miles from any even medium sized town.

Gah, I can't open Rightmove links on my phone anymore. I don't know why - the screen just goes blank. So frustrating! I want to see what is considered wanky description. I very much suspect our agent's description of our house would fall into this bracket (going on my Dad's sniggering 'did you write that...?'

It's so wonderful and they love it so much that they are leaving after less than 5 years...?

if they love it so much, why are they moving?

xposts Soup

:)

And re Pic 4 for House 1.... if you look carefully they have two taps! And two sinks!! [gasp]

Fine & Country always do the wanky personal crap in their sales blurb. Makes me cringe.

What a pair of wanky houses.

The interior design is completely soulless in both of them. And agree - what the hell is that extension next to the 'georgian' house about?

Fine and Country in the Sunday Times property supplement is priceless. It's all Joyce and Nigel have raised their family in their sumptuous Weybridge home.

What GetOrf & Exit said - the blurb in their ads is so pretentious, it cracks me up every time. I can't think what possesses people to use them, it's cringe making!

lake? I thought that was just where the garden flooded

They can piss off with 'orangerie' it's just a conservatory