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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Do you help in your childs school...

30 replies

smith1 · 20/09/2011 10:48

...and if so is it in their class?
I want to help in school with DS year 2 and DD YR. I have been asked to help in year 1 listening to children read. I don't want to sound selfish, but I am a working mum with 2 mornings to spare, so if I am going to give up a morning then I want it to be for MY children.
I helped in DS's class last year, no problems etc being there.
What do you do?

OP posts:

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maggie6 · 20/09/2011 10:57

I do an hour a week. In years past, I have always done the same year group (there is only one class per year group), but now this year, my dd is in that particular year group, I have been given the year above. I take it that the school knows best on this one and have not asked to be in dd's class.

At ds's secondary school they ask for parent delegates to represent the parents of the children in each class, but you have to do it for a class other than your child's which I have never seen before.

Eliza2little · 20/09/2011 12:17

I think it's perfectly reasonable to help out in YOUR child's class. I've helped every year at my kids primary and only 1 year did I work with another year group. There are always children in every class who need extra support and I certainly don't think it's selfish of you to specify which class you want to work with.

PatriciaHolm · 20/09/2011 13:19

Our school don't let you read with your children' class. I think the feeling is that this can lead to competitive parent syndrome (x is on a higher level than you! etc) plus the idea of a parent in the same class reading with their DC's friends makes a lot of parents uncomfortable. I don't think there are any hard and fast nation wide rules as such though.

newtermnewname · 20/09/2011 13:30

smith1 Has it occurred to you that they have asked you to help in year 1 because that is where the help is needed most?

bigbadwolf · 20/09/2011 13:41

I help out for an hour a week - last year in year 4, this year in YR. We're not allowed to help in our own children's classes, and I'm happy with that. I go where I'm most needed; and I enjoy seeing what goes on in other classes and getting to know children I wouldn't normally meet.

ChippyMinton · 20/09/2011 13:46

In our school they prefer you to listen to reading in the parallel class (2-form entry) rather than your own child's.
Hopefully another parent will be returning the favour to your DC's classes?

notformedear · 20/09/2011 13:47

sorry but your OP sounds really selfish

Catsdontcare · 20/09/2011 13:56

I don't think it's the school's job to accomadate you in your desire to spend more time with your children. If you don't want to give up your time to help the school then don't

BeerTricksPotter · 20/09/2011 14:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seeline · 20/09/2011 14:23

If parents offer to help in my DCs school it is always with their own DCs class. we are always reminded about the need for confidentiality etc and it seems to work fine. TBH I don't think they'd get as much help as they do if it were any different as although it sounds selfish I think most would prefer to help their own kids!!

newtermnewname · 20/09/2011 14:37

I wouldn't.

But I am helping my kids by helping in a different class! ie. the time a TA may spend hearing readers in one class could then be used for hearing readers in MY child's class, thus freeing up more teacher time to teach MY children.

sittinginthesun · 20/09/2011 14:42

I help, but not in a specific class. I prefer it that way - I genuinely like to help and feel part of the school. I see my dcs occasionally, but help whever needed. Oh, and I don't actually have any free time, I have to carve out an hour from a lunchbreak:)

Elibean · 20/09/2011 14:43

Its usually with kid's own class at our school, unless you ask not to (or if they think your child will find it upsetting).

Clear confidentiality rules, and no problems thus far (been doing it for 3 years, and about to start with dd2).

Its fun, i know all dd's classmates and they are a lovely bunch - I've grown fond of the lot of 'em. Its very cool seeing them all 'get it' and develop over the years.

treas · 20/09/2011 14:46

You either want to help out at the school or you don't.

piprabbit · 20/09/2011 14:47

Although I have helped with my DDs class for the last couple of years, I've never actually read with my DD (except once when trips meant everything was a little out of synch).

TBH I read with my DD at home. She benefits from reading with someone different once a week and I find that reading with other children of differing abilities is a good way of improving my skills too.

The OP may also find that the day she is available to help in school is not the day that her children are scheduled to read.

So, if the OP isn't going to be reading with her own children, does it really make a lot of difference whether she reads with children from her DCs class or a different class?

Hullygully · 20/09/2011 14:48

If you're not in your own kid's class you can't get to know all the kids, butter up the teacher and have a good snoop about

piprabbit · 20/09/2011 14:52

Hully - I'm shocked. Surely this isn't just about getting access to the reading level records for the whole class??

Hullygully · 20/09/2011 14:53

It's not just that. There's loads you can have a snoop at. Have a look at the teacher's desk, and even get in her cupboard while you put your bag in there. Hoh yes.

moonmother · 20/09/2011 14:58

I'm a mid day supervisor , and 2 afternoons a week listen to Ds's (year 3) class read.. I'm bound by a confidentiality agreement anyway, due to the lunch time work, but would help in any class that needed it.

My Ds's class does need help, as the TA (a friend and parent of a child in the class) also has to help in the office 2 days a week and really struggles to get to hear all the children read, so 2 of us MDS help her in the afternoons.

No worries about parents helping in their child's class in our school, they are thankful for any help they get.

melodyangel · 20/09/2011 14:58

When DS1 started school is was very keen to go in and help out with reading, I was hoping to train as a teacher at that time, but I asked not to be in a class with him as I thought I might be a distraction for him. I was told that they don't do that and I shouldn't be so fussy! I was very young and very self conscious and felt very silly for asking and so didn't persuse it. Glad not every where is not like this.

Skip forward many, many years and I have just started to help out in DS2 class. I waited until he was older and more able to understand that I'm not there to be with him. I'm really enjoying it.

OP - I would say that by helping at your childs school you are helping you DC's as they have more time with the teacher and you have a better understanding of the school. You also get to know many of the other children at the school which is really nice and you get so much back helping children, who may be struggling, to move forward with thier learning.

UniS · 20/09/2011 19:47

I help- but not in a classroom. I do stuff in school garden . I will go on school trips as a parent helper with my childs class.

On a routine basis I'd rather not be in and out of my childs classroom, I don't want to know too much about how other children in that class are doing. There is parent who listens to reading, it mildly annoys me as they are one of the competitive pushy parents, I'd rather they didn't know how my child is doing compared to their PFB.

3duracellbunnies · 20/09/2011 20:26

I think although I might be curious about reading levels etc, prob best to be in different classes as it might disrupt your child from concentrating seeing you, dd1 would prob want to sit on my lap and 'help' me listen, also means you don't need to be in a position knowin more about your children's classmates than you need to. If you want to spend more time with them, why not do the reading, then take them both out/home for their lunchhour once a week. We took dd1 out on dd2's first day and dd1 thought it was so cool, you only get an hour but at least it is an hour in which you can have fun.

Feenie · 20/09/2011 20:36

It's not just that. There's loads you can have a snoop at. Have a look at the teacher's desk, and even get in her cupboard while you put your bag in there. Hoh yes.

Hmm...were you the parent I found rummaging through papers on my desk one parent's evening, Hullygully?

piprabbit · 20/09/2011 21:21

BTW - it's not just the parents that have a snoop.

I couldn't work out how my DD knew she had been sitting her Y2 SATS. I knew that we hadn't used the phrase SATS and the school had said that they didn't either.

Turns out that the class had been sneakily reading the teacher's schedule (left on her desk) which had the SATS sessions marked as....SATS.

Meglet · 20/09/2011 21:26

You can't pick and choose what class you go into.

FWIW if I was to help out I would rather not help in my DC's class, he'd bugger about if I was there.

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