Feeling down before abortion - SIL is being a bit brutal

[Meganj95]

Hi guys
Not really a question more of a vent really - I'm booked in for an abortion on Tuesday at 14 weeks. Have known since 4 weeks but it's taken me so long to decide and pick up the phone etc. Am quite close with SIL (partners brothers wife) or so I thought. I told her I was pregnant and was thinking about termination and her reply was "wow I'm pregnant too". Turns out her due date is the day after when mine was meant to be. Ever since somehow the whole family know about it (even an aunt who lives 2 hours away and text me about it). It's also been sort of thrown in my face, not sure if intentionally. For examples I get messages like "when is your appointment how are you feeling" etc followed by a hoard of photos of new baby clothes she has bought. It makes me wish I was keeping my baby, as I remember what a happy time it was when I gave birth to my daughter a year ago. I know I'm doing the right thing by terminating due to relationship problems, financial problems, my daughter still being so young etc etc but i can't help but imagine.

Wishing you luck is bad enough

Thinking of you OP

I'm really sorry you've had to go through this. You did what you think is best for your family & yourself- try not to beat yourself up about it. I also would have blocked SIL, she's entitled to be excited but she's over stepping a little bit.

Try not to be too hard on yourself

Oh op. Is your sister in law quite stupid or thoughtless? She should never have anyone. That's really insensitive. In an ideal world she would never have told anyone and she'd rein in her enthusiasm in front of you. Perhaps she is able to sympathise with you (how are you, when's the appointment?) but able to separate her excitement from your situation. You've naturally shared a confidence, it was complicated by her situation. Your decision is sound for you. Don't be destabilised by others. You'll get past this.

Sending love and support.xx

Hi hope you're feeling a little better now? You did what was right for you. Someone told me Budhasim believe a baby doesn't get a soul until it's born. I like to think that's true :D be strong lovely original poster you have lots of support here x

Sending you well wishes!

These things are really tough but once the hormones calm down and you regain normality that sense of relief only grows.

Hope your recovery is speedy ❤️

Let this be a lesson to you OP, that you cannot trust anyone except yourself.

Speak for yourself
I trust a group of girlfriends I’ve had for twenty plus years more than I trust myself

Sending hugs OP

Sending you loads of love and hugs OP. You are so strong and I wish you all the best for the future x