Things not to say to a full term pregnant lady... Rant/ fun

[HannahG315]

If anyone says the following to me ONE more time, I will kill them:

• not long now
• oh when he's out, you'll be missing pregnancy
• you think that's bad you should insert something I don't care about here
• oh I reckon he'll be at least 'x' days overdue
• AND THE WORST: you know that lady whose due date is exactly the same as yours... She had her baby.

'tired?! You're tired?! You don't know what tired is. You wait til the baby's here!!'

Because 3 hours sleep a night due to pregnancy insomnia should leave you refreshed. Obviously.

I'm not even full term and this one is grating on me...

"You'll forget all about the back pain/sleeplessness/discomfort/heartburn/feeling like a whale when he's here"

Yes I probably will, BUT THATS NOT HELPING ME NOW IS IT?!

"Never mind, a girl next time", whilst I was 39 wks with my beautiful second son!

I'm no where near full term (24 weeks) but so sick of people (especially MIL) commenting on my bump size/shape and even the fact my boobs are huge! And I know the comments will only get worse as time goes on! I love my bump and am delighted to be pregnant just fed up of the coney an comments. Why do they feel the need to say my bump is too big/small etc!

• constant comments (not "Coney an")

My husband said when I was full term with no 2 "is that cellulite on the back of your thighs", knowing full well I couldn't manoeuvre myself to check. His idea of a joke.

He's still alive, God only knows how... And we have a third DC as well...

I got, 'why don't you treat yourself and get a wax!?!' From my OH

I can't even see my bikini line and I couldn't give a flying BLEEP if any doctors or midwives think I could do with a Brazilian.

Dp " stop hiding behind that pregnancy " as though im using it as an excuse not to lift heavy things during our house move this wknd (im 39 weeks pg).
He's lucky to be breathing.

At 37 weeks I was going through a doorway into a shop, passing a man of 35ish inside the shop. He smiled at me and I smiled back, then he said in a really loud voice "Wow! That is huge!" Pointing to my bump. I really wish I'd said something back, but was too embarrassed. What a twat.

"are you measuring right for your dates?"

Best when asked by someone who has never been pregnant.

OMG YOU'RE HUGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"have you had that baby yet?/Are you still pregnant?"

At 40+5 'do you think of it in there getting bigger and bigger everyday'.

''You can go 2 weeks over your due date you know''

I'm on matenrity leave and just popped in to work to see friends. I've just been greeted with " I can't believe how huge you are!

One friend poking me in the stomach.

Helllloooooooo fattttyy (my worst one)

'Are you sure it's not twins?' Said by random check out boy. Nearly poked the little turd in the eye.

Yeah anything involving "just wait til the baby is here, then you'll really know what tiredness is" - usually said by new mums who were also complaining about being heavily pregnant just weeks ago.

..... It's going to get bigger!!!! - oh bore off I know !!! And every blinking horror story has been told to me - WHY do I want to hear it, no I blooming don't !!!!

at the minute its all about how tired I will be once the baby is here and how I wont have time to do anything else and will just want to sleep. oh and are you doing your pelvic floor exercises... why do they need to know? its not like they can see them or can tell.

My worst was with my first pg, 'O...M...G....' stands back for a better look 'you are HUGE'.

If this happens this time I am going to reply with, I know, so huge I have my own orbit, why not throw something in and see it rotate? (stolen joke from .)

I got a text from an ex today that asked "are you thin again yet?"!!!!!
He is sooooo lucky he lives far away!

I have a 15 month old and am 36 weeks. Not a day goes by when I don't hear "you're going to have your hands full," or "you've hard work ahead!" Thanks everyone for the helpful advice - I hadn't considered that...

The 'enjoy your sleep' one drove me mad. Like anyone can sleep heavily pregnant! I slept SO MUCH BETTER with a newborn, even with dozy night feeds!

Hang in there Hannah!!!

From a shop assistant: "are you planning on having it naturally? It's an enormous bump!"

Thanks for that. I was mostly angry that she was right as DS had a massive head resulting in forceps

I love my work colleagues in the main, but the constant (admittedly light-hearted) comments are getting on my nerves now. Nicknames like 'fatty boom boom' are grating, and my maternity uniform (which because my boss unhelpfully ordered the wrong size is far too big for me) is resulting in lots of teasing about the 'tent' I have to wear and about how silly I look because my normal uniform is now far too tight. I can take a joke, and have laughed off these sort of 'jokes' for several weeks now, but today felt tired and hormonal and ended up having a few tears in the staff room on my own because I'm fed up of the comments on my appearance. :(