Potty training outings: stay home, use pull-ups, or try pants?

[Fantabulousauras]

DS2 has been full on potty training for the past 3 days. Today all wees were on the toilet/potty with a couple of wet patches on pants where he had stopped himself from wetting himself and one poo accident. Majority of the past 3 days he has been at nursery but has been familiar with the toilet for a while.

Is it better to skip a brunch outing tomorrow and stay home or do brunch with a pull up on, or go to pants already when out?

Have a longer outing garden bbq on Saturday so wondering what to do then too.

Any help would be appreciated!

Definitely not pullup, that's going back to nappies and may confuse him.
Pants and shorts when out, ones easy to get on and off quickly. Get a wee done before you go, take him hourly when there, but don't stress. At least being a BBQ you'll be outside if he has an accident!

If he has been “full on training “ but at nursery absolutely do not stop.

full on trading is usually a couple of days at home.

just stick on pants and ask frequently and take changes of clothing.

he is doing great.

Thank you that is helpful to know. Hoping it will be ok!

Thank you! Do you think it is better to skip the brunch tomorrow and focus?

Rule of thumb: if you're going somewhere where your DC absolutely CANNOT have an accident, to the extent that when they say they have to go you'll be running along dragging them through the air shouting "just hang on a minute longer sweetie, I'm sure we'll find a loo soon", it's probably best just to put a pull-up on them. Extreme stress communicated from adult to tiny child is probably worse than any confusion caused.

If it's fine for them to have an accident and it's somewhere you can be fairly blase about it, then crack on with pants.

Thanks - got it! So like travel days aeroplanes later on or very long car journeys pullups will be best but I am thinking 15 min car journey to a cafe and then someone's back garden at the weekend will be ok.

You can pop a puppy training pad on the car seat to protect it/so it isn't wet to sit on.

If you can smile serenely, say 'don't worry darling, accidents happen' and produce numerous changes of clothes when required without feeling stressed, then I think it's fine to ditch the pull ups.

If it would be a complete disaster of epic proportions leaving you with no plan B if your DC had an accident, then yes, I think a pull up is called for in those circumstances.

My older DC was potty trained by 2 1/2 but we still did pull ups on planes/trains/long car trips until he was over 4.

Not sure I agree with that tbh.
I never put a pull up on either of mine again from the day we started potty training with the exception of naps for the first week or so and at night. I'm not sure I've been anywhere they absolutely couldn't have an accident though. Even very long car journeys (and we did 5 hours on week 3 with one of them!) we just made sure to wee before we left, stop regularly, chose A roads with lay-bys not motorways and always always always had the potty with us.
@Fantabulousauras Don't leave for your car journeys there and back until he's just been. Watch the amount of liquid he's drinking if being plied with exciting things. Fruit shoots have mine producing multiple wees every 20 mins in contrast to the usual 2-3 hours!

we just made sure to wee before we left, stop regularly, chose A roads with lay-bys not motorways and always always always had the potty with us.

Yeah, we didn't do this. Respect to those who do, but my family live 8 hours drive away and we regularly drive up there for a long weekend on a Friday evening, so really do need to get there as quickly as possible.

I've never regretted the pull-ups, especially when there was an accident in front of us on the motorway and the road was closed for hours. We were just sitting in stationary traffic and DC getting distressed at wetting his car seat would have made everything much, much worse.

But everyone does their best for their particular child and in their particular circumstances so I never judge anyone who takes a different approach. They'll all get there in the end.

How has the toileting been at nursery?

For first trip out, baggy loose bottoms, no underwear. Do not do a pull up – completely backwards.

I’d only attempt a trip out if he has mastered it at home.

Ditch the pull ups & just stick with pants now, pack lots of spare clothes and take a carry potty

Yes got this thanks!

Thank you good to know

So today no accidents at nursery all day and just small wet patches on pants this morn and eve at home where hes stopped himself weeing and one poo accident! 7 successful wees today.

Sounds like he’s ready for a trip out?

Underwear, at this early stage, can trigger the muscle memory of wearing a nappy and make it more challenging for them to hold it. This is why loose bottoms are recommended. And then onto underwear once they have mastered being out and about.

Personally we did pull ups with both kids at two in the first couple of weeks if we were on planes or in someone’s house, or we were in a restaurant etc. They didn’t wee in them, and still went to the toilet, but it gave us a layer of security in case! Both were fine and not confused, both were fully potty trained at just over two, and for us it didn’t set them back

The trip out was successful he didn't wee at all the whole time but he has had 2 wee accidents so far today at home.

Not sure if it is because nursery sits him every 20 mins whereas I only ask him every 30 or so and if he says no I dont sit him. Thinking to sit him every 30 now...

I didn't know that about underwear hmm.

Thank you that's good to know. Now not sure what to do at the bbq this weekend.

Well done him! I would sit him at intervals at all, if I’m honest. It interferes with their ability to recognise a full bladder and the need to go if they are weeing before that point.

In situations where he absolutely cannot have an accident then yes use a pull up but put it over pants so he still feels the wet. However, for me that would be a long car journey or flight where he’d be stuck in a wet seat for hours. Not wanting to go to brunch. I think he definitely sounds ready for an outing but I’d go lower risk for the first one like a local park- have a wee right before you go, only stay an hour, take a change of clothes just in case and he can always have a bush wee if there aren’t nearby toilets. If that goes well then do more. Outdoor bbq sounds fine also, just pack multiple changes and take him regularly to the loo.

Agree. I know nursery will need to do it sometimes, like they might ask all the kids to go before they outside as it’s a pain for staff ratios if one has to accompany a single child back in, but ordinarily they shouldn’t be sitting him and certainly not every 20 minutes. To be fully potty trained he has to learn the feeling of a full bladder so he knows to go independently.

Go out, but pack lots of spare cloths, take him to try frequently and aim to be outside as much as possible so it matters less if there are accidents.

I agree with @GoFigure235. For non crucial occasions, just come prepared with lots of wipes and clean outfits. It’s not as bad as you might think to just whist them away and clean them up.

Oo interesting perspective. I thought the accidents today were because I wasn't sitting him often enough but maybe it is because it is only day 4!