Struggling to agree on suitable school uniform for starting secondary school

[LatteMum1]

Hi, struggling with school uniform for 12 year old about to start secondary school next month. We went to New Look yesterday and have somehow left with quite a short skirt with shorts built it as she really liked it. I caved I guess. Anyone having similar struggles ?

How strict is the school? Above the knee skirts at ours gets girls sent home, especially right at the start of the new school year.

We had an official skirt, anything else I got from M&S or the local school uniform shop. I wouldn't have gone into New Look for uniform in the first place.

Go to the supermarkets or M&S and go specifically to their uniform section and choose from there and having read the uniform policy.

Who gets uniform from New Look?

What's the school uniform policy, she will look a bit out of place in a short skort, the supermarkets and m&s are better than fashion shops.

Crosspost

What style does the skirt need to be?

We need black pleated skirts and I buy them on Amazon because they are more stretchy material - DD does not like the structured skirts that supermarkets / M&S sell.

As already said, New Look doesn't sell ' school uniform ' does it

Supermarkets, M&S or John Lewis.

Fortunately you can take this skirt straight back to New Look.

Is this your first day on earth?! You were always going to get shafted shopping for school uniform in New Look... it isnt a uniform shop! Pre-teens are a force, aren't they.

Check the handbook, go to M&S or the supermarkets, stand your ground now or you're in for a heck of a few years.

Around my way you have to get them from a school shop as they have a colourful band at the top so they can check if is being rolled up. Usually the rules are only just above the knees.

Good luck as the teenage years progress, OP 😂

Well... what does the school's uniform guide say?

Just follow that and you'll be good

Oh and I don't think a skort is an issue, mine would wear little cycling shorts underneath a skirt anyway. But if the school rule is for a specific length then you need a skirt that meets that.

If they roll it up as soon as they leave the house it is what it is, but you've got to provide uniform that meets the criteria!

I doubt many will be having similar struggles as parents tend to go to shops that sell school uniform, not shops that sell teenage fashion.

If it just says any skirt in dark blue or black or whatever then that's fine.

If it says must be from from xyz special shop, pleated, knee length only etc then it's not.

Most of my DD's school wears those new look skorts. They have quite a few types. They don't have to have long or official 'uniform' skirts in her school so very few wear it. Just needs to be grey or black.

Are they still in term time, or broken up for the holidays? You want to see what the kids at the school are actually wearing Vs her ideas alone. I let DD have her black ra-ra skirt on the back of seeing literally hundreds of girls in the school wearing that exact skirt...

Do not begin the term being THAT parent. You're heading for a, sad face article in the daily mail.

Thry have a uniform. New Look is not a uniform shop. There's enough places selling KNEE LENGTH skirts or sensible trousers. No she doesn't need to flash her knickers to prove that girls should be able to wear anything they like without fear of boys / men. You can do that after 3 pm.

It's really not fine, it's OK for PE but any school uniform dept will have plain or pleated skirts

Well that's the thing, it might be fine if the school allows it?! How do you know what every single school has as the rules for their skirt?
I'm not saying it's likely but they might just say any skirt this colour.

The stiffer fabric is what makes the uniform skirts look smarter - why on earth would your dd need a stretchy skirt for school?

Its not about what she likes its about what the school has indicated they should be wearing. Can't believe anyone would buy a stretchy skirt off amazon and call it school uniform, its not a fashion show 😒

New Look?
Try harder.

It's not stretchy like a boob tube 😅 it is quite heavy jersey fabric. And tbh it doesn't look remotely smart when the only size that goes over her hips is massive around the waist and hangs down below her knees. A skirt that fits will always look better than one that doesn't, that's a fact of life whatever age you are.

But yes you do have to be careful not to buy a teeny tiny mini skirt that only covers the arse 😅

Are you prepared for your DD to be put in seclusion on her first day and potentially be sent home?

Is it normal to buy uniform from high street shops? I had to go to a specific shop or the onsite uniform shop and get the black watch tartan skirt, a logoed jumper, logoed sportswear, sorry I don't have kids i only have my own experience. My brother also had to have a logoed blazer and logoed tie in stripes denoting which house he was in.

Does it meet the uniform requirements? If the school is anything like DC's was, your DD will be punished if not wearing clothes that meet the regulations. At DD's school skirts had to be on or below the knee.

You shouldn't have caved though, you are the parent, you make the decisions.

One of my most-repeated phrases at that time was ‘this is not a negotiation darling. I am telling you what is going to happen.’

Could have been uniform, going somewhere, anything where there was simply no alternative option and no discussion required. We are doing x, that’s it.

And then you counter-balance it with inviting contribution for the stuff that is open to discussion.

I can really recommend it as a practice - start now and don’t entertain the attempts to debate or negotiate when they’re not on the table.