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Husband wants me to look and smell better at home because of his daughter

31 replies

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 19:59

I'm a 25 year old woman who's now a stepmom to a 13 year old girl.
At home, I'm very comfortable. I do active things and I don't love the AC, so I smell like sweat a lot of the time.
I don't my makeup nor hair when staying at home. I don't wear jewelry at home. Half the time I wear a tank top and shorts at home.
My stepdaughter started copying my look, and my husband isn't happy.
He's saying I need to start looking and smelling while at home. That being a woman in the home, it's natural for his daughter to look at me like a maternal figure.

I'm such an amateur to the whole mom thing so I want to hear from other moms.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Sirzy · 11/08/2025 20:03

Knowing you smell of sweat and being ok with it is really odd even if your own home

Wish44 · 11/08/2025 20:03

Don’t waste your life/ time/energy with this man.

please.

Wish44 · 11/08/2025 20:04

Don’t waste your life/ time/energy with this man.

please.

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PurpleChrayn · 11/08/2025 20:04

Have a shower, you sweaty ‘aporth! Very unpleasant to be smelly.

Jibberjabba · 11/08/2025 20:04

Its nice to smell fresh for your own sake

ILoveWhales · 11/08/2025 20:05

It's a bit grim, you re not even old enough to be this child's mother.

Id move on and find somebody else.

healthybychristmas · 11/08/2025 20:05

Hmmm.

PenguinLove1 · 11/08/2025 20:05

You dont need to do your hair or makeup and im all for being comfortable at home, but basic hygiene is still important so its not great to know you smell and do nothing about it

girljulian · 11/08/2025 20:05

Is it really because of his daughter or is that his excuse because you smell?

Hoppinggreen · 11/08/2025 20:06

Taking aside the fact that this man is quite a bit older than you with a teenager and he is telling you what to do WHY do you smell?
There is no need

Confabulations · 11/08/2025 20:07

Nothing wrong with your look. Your smell and personal hygiene, on the other hand leave a lot to be desired.

Poopeepoopee · 11/08/2025 20:07

girljulian · 11/08/2025 20:05

Is it really because of his daughter or is that his excuse because you smell?

I wondered this too.

He probably just doesn't like the fact that you smell of sweat and this is his polite way of telling you.

Would showering more often be an option?

wizzywig · 11/08/2025 20:08

Well, that's a nice age gap between you and your partner!

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 20:08

PenguinLove1 · 11/08/2025 20:05

You dont need to do your hair or makeup and im all for being comfortable at home, but basic hygiene is still important so its not great to know you smell and do nothing about it

I workout twice a day on average. I do a lot of yard work as we have a big yard. I cook, the kitchen and the bathrooms are not connected to the AC.

I'm very active in the days.

OP posts:
PickledMuffin · 11/08/2025 20:09

You’re allowed to look like how you wish in your home. With the ‘smell better’ do you use deodorant?

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 20:09

PickledMuffin · 11/08/2025 20:09

You’re allowed to look like how you wish in your home. With the ‘smell better’ do you use deodorant?

I use deodorant

OP posts:
CatamaranViper · 11/08/2025 20:09

I'm all for comfort, especially at home, but at least don't inflict BO on other people

Sirzy · 11/08/2025 20:09

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 20:08

I workout twice a day on average. I do a lot of yard work as we have a big yard. I cook, the kitchen and the bathrooms are not connected to the AC.

I'm very active in the days.

No more active than lots of people who still mange to do it without smelling. It’s basic hygiene

Radiowaawaa · 11/08/2025 20:09

Wear what you like but don’t be dirty.

arcticpandas · 11/08/2025 20:10

Haha are you for real? Ofcourse you can wear whatever you want to at home but why would you like to smell like shit? Take a shower and put some deodorant on, it's not rocket science.

Oh, and tell your man that if he wanted a role model for his daughter he shouldn't be in a relationship with someone old enough to be her older sister🙄

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 20:10

Poopeepoopee · 11/08/2025 20:07

I wondered this too.

He probably just doesn't like the fact that you smell of sweat and this is his polite way of telling you.

Would showering more often be an option?

On average, I shower 1 to 4 times a day, depending on the day.

OP posts:
beetr00 · 11/08/2025 20:11

Does your b.o. not knock you sick though @Instamom25 ?

Wouldn't be overly concerned about yer sloppy clothes though.

ILoveWhales · 11/08/2025 20:11

I often wondered if I made the most of my life when I was mid.Twenties. i was working hard in a career to get established, not an awful lot of time to myself because of it.

Having said that, I wasn't going out with a man with a child who was too old to be my daughter whilst he told me.I stank and criticized what I wore

Come on.You can do better than this at your age.

stillavid · 11/08/2025 20:11

You wear deodorant and shower up to 4 times a day but still smell - how???

A very odd thread.

Radiowaawaa · 11/08/2025 20:11

Instamom25 · 11/08/2025 20:08

I workout twice a day on average. I do a lot of yard work as we have a big yard. I cook, the kitchen and the bathrooms are not connected to the AC.

I'm very active in the days.

I work out a lot. I don’t smell.

I agree that not having a basic standard of hygiene isn’t good for his daughter to witness. It’s not good for you or your relationships either.

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