Wwyd - nursery wanting non walking child to have shoes

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

DS is 18 mos. He was deprived of oxygen at birth and whether for this reason or because he is a slow developer, he doesn't really walk yet. (He is under paeds care.)

He can pull himself up and stagger a few steps but crawls mostly.

As he is 18mos his nursery have moved him to the toddler room. This room has an area of outdoor decking and they are now saying he must have shoes.

We've always been told it is important to allow babies to learn to walk without shoes and only put shoes on when they are confident - but nursery say this isn't true. They are quite insistent.

Wwyd?

Does he have any physio input?
How long does he do at nursery?

No physio right now. We are waiting on the next cons appt to come through but may take a while.

He does 3 x full days.

Can he not have a little pair of soft shoes they put on him when he’s going out on the deck and be barefoot the rest of the time?

That’s an interesting one. Does he have input from a physio and if so what do they think? Some children who walk later need extra support round their ankles but you’d need a HCP to assess that. When mine were outside crawling and pulling to stand I had some soft flexible wellies that worked well to protect their feet for dirt and cold so I can see from a practical point of view why nursery are asking- socks don’t give much protection!

How about something like this: www.amazon.com/Enteer-Premium-Anti-Slip-Prewalker-Toddler/dp/B07477GH54?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

www.mountainwarehouse.com/kids-caribou-single-stripe-snow-boot-p11659.aspx/Blue/?utm_source=google_shopping&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=GB+Whoop+-+All+Products+-+Mobile+-+SHOPPING+UK&utm_term=&utm_content=s|pcrid|249794115763|pkw||pmt||pdv|m|slid||product|021971006010|&gclid=CjwKCAjwk93rBRBLEiwAcMapUd0rI4HJAqWxqDTRO9U_b1LycLX9DVgMLCuEToqlsjZUQ2E_0zGEsRoCqxQQAvD_BwE

They just don't want him to get splinters or scrape his feet. Get him some soft leather slippers.

I think it's probably a health and safety thing. They don't want him pulling himself up and possibly standing on something on the floor that could hurt his feet, Lego brick etc!!

If it's only 3 dash I would get some little cruising shoes for nursery days and press on with walking without shoes at home.

We had Clarks prewalkers for DS so he could go outside before he could walk(especially as it was over winter and I was concerned about cold toes)

Will they make sure he's in socks/barefeet when they are inside?

Thanks all.

So we got him some slipper socks but they those were no good as if it was raining his feet would get wet.

We have found some soft moccasins which I am going to try and persuade them to use but last week they said something with a sole.

I think they probably want to protect his feet when going out and from other walking children.

Both ds and dd2 walked late and had physio input and both were recommended shoes. Ds (he has longer term issues) had boots prescribed and with dd2 we were recommended shoes to give her a more solid base for walking and standing.

Do you feel they are moving him too early. Are there any other areas of development that he is delayed in?

Maybe, if you are awaiting physio you could ask him to be kept in the younger room until you have had advice on footwear?

I think they are totally doing it for good reasons! I am just not sure it is meeting his needs.

I do not know that we will get physio to be fair - he may not need it. He has always had a tremor in his legs but he can stagger a bit now so it may be just a case of letting him develop. Will see what cons says but goodness knows when that appt will come!

The tricky thing about him going back to babies is that his twin is definitely ready for toddlers and I think they wouldn't like being separated.

Hmmm! Will hope they accept the moccasins.

Get a physio review and ask.
Likelihood is that outdoor shoes wont harm and may help give support to weak ankles.
Ds walked late first steps after two but had outdoor shoes earlier for practical reasons and because they gave him support.

now go to shoe shop and try explaining why you buying shoes for a non Walker....hence a physio review and written advice to buy shoes /boots will help you .
But yes I would get him outdoor shoes to protect his feet and allow him to experience outside.

I'd get him a pair of cruisers, soft shoes with a rubber sole.
It does sound like they have the best of intentions. Decks can sometimes be slippy esp if they are damp.

Okay so I will try with the moccasins and if not, then go to Clark's this weekend and see about cruisers.

Tbh it is just a bit of a sore subject for me as DS is such a happy baby, but recently he just watches his twin and big sis tear off across the playground together and looks so sad I am probably oversensitive about it all.

Similar situation with my youngest, lack of O2 and general delay. Didn't really walk until about 22 months.

He had physio involvement/paed care and they basically said the opposite. He needed good supportive shoes to help support him. He had low tone though, poss hypermobile, so prob different situation?
Just saying though, shoes aren't necessarily a bad thing at this age, the advice about learning to walk without shoes doesn't always apply, depending on particular reason/symptoms of delay

We've just got some Clark's roamers for DS. They are listed as 'pre walkers' for cruising and crawling. His socks were getting grubby from crawling and pulling up when we are in a public place or outside, so it just seemed the normal thing to do. As long as they have bare foot time at home, it won't effect walking, it may even encourage as you'll be more likely to put him down outside.
Alternatively you could try inch blue shoes or 'step ons' fro the makers of sock ons.

Had a fight with Clarks when I had to buy his first shoes. He really did need proper ones, not soft cruisers, but Clarks wouldn't have it. Eventually got them to sell me the right thing though.

When are you expecting to see the physio?

Get these H&M waterproof booties, we got them for DS before he was walking (to keep his feet warm when he was in the Ergobaby) and they were brill. Only £8

Or some Bobux Xplorers (but they're pricey even when on sale)

Bloody hell, when my daughter was at crèche ( from about 8 months to 2 years) I hardly ever sent her in with shoes - and if I did, of have to find them when I picked her up. She was in and out and clambering around on their outdoor play equipment / riding a trike all day. I wasn't the only one by any means, and it was never an issue.

There really is no reason for him to have shoes and I would just say no. There’s not much they can do about it.

My ds only started walking at 18 months (perfectly developmentally on track, 15 months is average, so surely they have had plenty of non walkers at his age). He goes to a largely outdoor nursery. They are outside nearly all day unless there is heavy rain or snow. I just send lots of changes of clothes and thick socks. If it’s really wet or cold, they put him in waterproofs and socks and tie nappy bags over his feet. Works great. He could play and explore and practice walking, playing in sand, mud, etc and not get wet or cold. If he did they just changed his clothes.

He’s been walking for over a month and I still haven’t gotten him shoes. There hasn’t been any need and nursery are happy with that. Crawling over decking is more likely to hurt his knees if anything. His feet will be fine.

To reiterate that shoes may help him walk.
Given he has identified delays ask physio for advice

Would it be possible for them to return him to the baby room until he can walk confidently? I would raise it with them. He’s not exactly a ‘standard’ 18 month old running around so I can’t see why he wouldn’t be fine in the baby room for a few more months.