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Original poster

Has anyone ever been stared at??

62 replies

belgianmama · 17/12/2006 18:00

I've got 2dc's and I'm sure some of you must know they're Dutch/English bilingual. I'm quite strict with the OPOL strategy and always talk Dutch to my 2. They find it only natural and are not embarrased or anything. If anything they'd find it odd of I speak English to them. Anyway. The other day I was in Asda and I'm used to people's head turning when I speak Dutch, but it's usually for a second and then they carry on. This time, though, this man started staring when he heard me speak Dutch and then he just kept on staring during my whole conversation. When I challenged him he didn't appologise or anything . I was sooooo . It's so rude to stare. It's not like I'm the only person the area that speaks a different language!

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ClementClarkeMoore · 17/12/2006 18:04

Well done for challenging, how rude!

Indith · 17/12/2006 18:11

God yes. The little old ladies giving you daggers are the worst. What do they think is going to happen? Its French ffs its not like I'm running around naked waving a carving knife!

Mind you some neo nazi kid in my class at school used to think I shouldn't be allowed to be in Britain because I was half French!

moondog · 17/12/2006 18:12

He was probably just interested.
In our family we have children who speak English/Welsh/French/Korean and we like it when people stare.

How odd to 'challenge' him...

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Katerina75 · 17/12/2006 18:15

a man once leaned over to my family's table in a cafe and told us we were rude for speaking a foreign language .... amongst ourselves!

PinkTinsel · 17/12/2006 18:15

lol.... he might have been like me... if i hear dutch in the supermarket i can't help but look as i'm dutch and i always have that insane 'omg there's another one!' reaction, even though i can barely speak a word ofit anymore! (my dad wasn't into OPOL, he liked to come home after speaking 4 languages all week and speak the same language to both me and mom)

moondog · 17/12/2006 18:17

OK Kat,that was rude.
I would have gone ballistic.

Some loons may assume you are talking about them.
My response is a haughty laugh,a look down my nose and a
'Puh-lease! Don't flatter yourself!'

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 17/12/2006 18:20

One of my best friends at school was completely bilingual, I was always so impressed (I loved languages). When she was speaking Greek to her parents on the phone (boarding school) I used to sit on the stairs and eavesdrop, I just loved hearing the sound of her speaking Greek so fluently. Beautiful. I'm a weirdo, aren't I?

Katerina75 · 17/12/2006 18:24

shame it wasn't you sat next to us that time then Greensleeves!

MistleToo · 17/12/2006 18:25

Oui
Ja
Si

PizPizPiz · 17/12/2006 18:30

fshock
I'm actually surprised I never got that sort of reaction. People never stare nevermind comment on the fact that I speak 'funny' to my dd. I put it down to British politeness (not that widespread as I can see!). In fact I only got one comment so far, from a middle-aged lady (I think age is relevant in this matter) who said 'how lucky your little girl is to be bilingual' . I agree

moondog · 17/12/2006 18:38

Yes indeedy.
Tis the greatest gift of all.
It's an enormous tragedy when a language is lost to those who should have access to it.
I can not understand people who don't speak their mother tongue to their children.

I want to whisper in their ears
'They will resent your failure to pass on your language enormously when they are adults.'

PinkTinsel · 17/12/2006 18:42

exactly moondog..... it's the one thing i simply cannot forgive my dad for. in fact i get more upset about it as the years go by!

moondog · 17/12/2006 18:44

There you go!

PizPizPiz · 17/12/2006 18:45

I agree moondog. I keep teasing my mum whose mother tongue is Polish for not teaching me, on the grounds that it was useless in France! I could be a trilingual translator by now

Katerina75 · 17/12/2006 18:46

It's a shame no-one whispered that to my FIL - he's Turkish (MIL is American) and although they both spoke Turkish to my dp and her brother when they were very young, he decided to stop as they got to school age - perhaps he thought it would confuse them. They soon forgot most of their Turkish and although resentment is too strong a word, they definitely wish he had continued.

moondog · 17/12/2006 18:48

My father spoke Welsh to us even though we spent years living on a tropical island in PNG that was so isolated,we didn't even have a school.

belgo · 17/12/2006 19:01

Belgianmama - are you sure he couldn't understand what you were saying?

belgo · 17/12/2006 19:02

moondog - that must have been an amazing childhood!

DizzyBinterWonderland · 17/12/2006 19:43

i'm half moroccan and as a child i spoke 4 languages, english, french, arabic, and berber.

boy oh boy do i resent the fact my parents didn't speak to me in anything other than english when we moved here.

olittletownofberolina · 17/12/2006 19:46

I do get curious stares when I speak to ds in English in public (we're in Germany), more so down here in Swabia than in Berlin. What I dread more is someone then thinking they can try out their English on me or get free English lessons/translation services from me (has happened a couple of times)

Twiglett · 17/12/2006 19:56

Not forgetting of course that in some cultures there isn't the British / European reserve about staring at people that fascinate you .. maybe he wasn't aware he was doing anything rude

moondog · 17/12/2006 20:06

It was Belgo.

Dizzy,wow that is fantastic.
What do you speak now then??

DizzyBinterWonderland · 17/12/2006 20:08

english

and dreadfully poor french. i can understand french almost perfectly, but can't speak as well.

my parents should be ashamed.

Pitchounette · 17/12/2006 20:18

Message withdrawn

PizPizPiz · 17/12/2006 20:21

I think some people stare because they think 'wow that's amazing' though, rather than 'what the hell is going on here?!' iyswim.