Have just seen a neighbour throw a cat at my football

[CatAttack]

I know not everyone likes football but it was just sitting on the grass, minding its own business and suddenly my neighbour chucked a big ginger tom over the hedge and hit it. I mean it could have been badly punctured. What shall I do?

Call the pooooolice!!

or throw the fat ginger twat back!

if it is a city ball then this time the cat can live, united one i'm thinking potato sack, river and bricks

Kill the cat and use its bladder to make a back up ball............just in case it has been punctured............some people have no respect.

Hope the cat hadn't been drinking Caffreys, otherwise it has probably peed all over your ball as it landed,

you're totally overreacting catattack!
your neighbour was perfectly within his/her rights to throw their cat at your ball.
after all, it was sitting there.... and, being on the grass!
what do you expect????

I knew this thread would bring all the football haters out

I agree starlover

Also you are responsible for your ball and how do you think your neighbour feels when he finds it has bounced into his nicely-manicured garden? Gardening is hard enough without balls turning up in your delphiniums. He probably meant to miss the ball anyway, not actually hit it.

i hate it when footballs go rolling around all over the place.
flattening small areas of my grass.

I think you should apologise to your neighbour for letting the ball in your own garden!

Omg. I think it was me that threw that cat. I am so sorry. I like balls really but they do keep shitting in my garden. I'm not a football hater.

morningpaper, the ball was in my garden. But even if it had been in his garden, that's no excuse. Balls have to bounce - I can't control where it bounces. Footballs have rights too.

snafu, I am coming round to sort you out.

I'll put the kettle on, shall I?

i can't believe you think your football has more rights than a cat!
that owner was totally right to throw its cat into your garden.
you don't even deserve a garden if you're going to go around having balls in it! and if you can't control it then i think you should give it to someone who can look after it properly.
footballs need a lot of care you know

God no, crack open a bottle of wine, please.

Okeydoke. And would you like to try out my new airgun? It's got special anti-football pellets...hehehehehe

starlover, do you know anything about balls? A ball has to bounce. It's in its nature. Football fascists all coming out of the woodwork now.

Mmmm...it's just occurred to me WHY all men cheat!!!!! They end up married to a load of thickies like like you lot who spend all their tragic lives posting shit to total strangers who don't give a fuck about them.

Funny that the blokes are off getting their end away elsewhere.

Over and out.

Mmmm...it's just occurred to me WHY all men cheat!!!!! They end up married to a load of thickies like like you lot who spend all their tragic lives posting shit to total strangers who don't give a fuck about them.

Funny that the blokes are off getting their end away elsewhere.

Over and out.

you amateur snafu! you need the ak-47!!!

funny... you appear to be doing likewise!

I love my football. You have all really upset me

Hmmm, hope you've got a better grip on your man than you have on your computer, EB... ooops, forgot, he belongs to someone else anyway doesn't he?

And you're here why, EmmaB...?

Because Slappersnet.com doesn't exist yet?