Now we know who is middle class - next, who is posh?

[Takver]

following on from this thread I was tickled yesterday by two definitions of what is posh:

• talking to a friend about croquet, which I think is a really tedious game, her answer was that only posh people play croquet, and that the problem was that I was not posh enough . . .
• and description by dd's friend (age 8) of the woman her mum cleans for that she is 'really posh, she has double sky that you can record on as well as watch, and a fountain that looks like stone but is really made out of plastic, and loads of trophies from horseriding' So now I want the collective wisdom of MN - apart from croquet playing and fake stone fountains, what is really, really posh ?

I is.

getting out the bath to pee

When I was at uni (Bristol) I met someone who told me:

"It was so cold, I had to have a coat made"

and that has been my 'posh' yardstick ever since...

PMSL at Mamazon!

I remember being at uni with posh private school types who would boast about the educational standards at their fabulously expensive schools...then my fellow comprehensive-schooled friend would end the conversation by saying: "And yet, here we all are at the same university."

Not really relevant to your question; I just love that story. Least I included the word 'posh' in my post, though!

When you're discussing whether foxhunting should be banned and someone chips in, 'Yes, yes, I know it's morally indefensible, but it's brilliant fun!'

Someone who lives in a castle with holes in the roof. Everything is handed down through the generations, nothing is new and their idea of income is selling off a bit of silver from Charles the first's reign that's been gathering dust in the stable.

Oooh, here's one:

A Cambridge University study into level of common sense and general knowledge presented a group of first-year students with a questionnaire. One of the questions was: what would you use to peel a potato? A knife or a vegetable peeler?

One of the snootier respondents wrote huffily: I have never had to peel a potato in my life.

at rhinestone's coat made - that is pretty damn posh!

Anyone who says 'Yah'

Any adult who calls their parents "Mummy" and "Daddy"

Or who has a nickname like Wigsie or Woodles

And they do that thing where they talk without actually moving their lips.

Did anyone see Wills and Harry on Talking Heads asking for cheese and pheasant on their pizzas? Bloody funny!

I am working class, but posh

I say 'Yah'(and OK YAH), call parents Mummy and Daddy, went to Boarding School, play Polo (badly)...... and the list could go on....

Really posh people would never use the word posh - it would make them feel uncomfortable. So here are a few pointers on how to spot a toff:

they wash up without hot water and without fairy liquid
they are joyless about meat, there is nothing wrong with a slightly orf bit of Savers pork
They never own American stainless steel fridges, in fact their fridges are mostly at least 20 years old and don't really work properly (see orf pork)
They don't renovate houses, they restore
They don't decorate, they spruce up
They don't buy designer clothes
They don't buy a new coat, they find one in the boot room that someone left in 1973
they are completely unaware that you think they are arseholes
they drink a lot
they laugh like old drains
they don't have sky TV
they love their Roberts radio
they don't drive spanking new 'look at me' cars

I think they live life as it should be lived. Middle class life is so frightened. And tiring - all this constant aspiring and shopping. Groan.

DH played rugby with this chap at uni - apparently he was lovely but always poor and a bit ditzy. Anyway, they were down in the Borders playing and after the game he asked them all if they wanted to swing by his parents house for supper - they turned onto what they all thought was a B road, which turned out to be his driveway leading to the most enormous castle, and everything was just as Swedes described! He took such a ribbing

Sounds just like Drumlanrig Castle from memory!

Having the same name as the village they live in is a good indicator as well.

"I think they live life as it should be lived"

I'd prefer to have a non-smelly coat that fits thanks!

They have inherited all their furniture - and most of their clothes.

do you remember that series on the 'fucking fulfords' now they are posh.

If you imagine a clock face and you put toffs at 1 O clock, the middle classes would be at 6 O clock and the working classes would be at 11 O clock, in terms of sharing similar traits. The middle classes are way out on a limb, they are freaks. They are so busy aspiring and trying oh so hard at everything that they forget to be human beings.

Hey, if I had a housekeeper, I might drop it into the conversation . . . I am not posh though . . . but I would like a housekeeper

Are you posh or working class Swedes???

They have a signed photograph of the Queen on their piano, or even better one of her father or grandfather.

Michael Hesseltine was once described by some Tory grandee as "the sort of person who has to buy their own furniture" so not buying furniture has got to be part of it. Or clothes. Or houses.

I went to school with one girl.

All of her relatives houses were dirty yet at the same time very impressive and very welcoming. All Agas and old dogs snuffling about.

They all owned bashed up old volvos or fiestas full of dog hair and fag ash.

At 18 she still called her Mum "Mummy".

She was "paid for" by Grampa. And mostly was grateful for it.

I remember her Mother looking at wall paper samples and seeing the price per roll - I thought it was a quote to do the whole house I also remember thinking that it was a waste to spend all that money on good wallpaper that would be trashed by fag smoke, dogs and cats (and the kids!) within the week! Turned out the damp in the walls made it peel off within the month!