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Original poster

Do your children send a thank you note to someone whose party they have been to?

30 replies

Flum · 21/10/2008 16:54

I invariable make my dd who is 4 and half draw a card and write Thank you and her name at the bottom and do send it.

However recently we had a kids party and did not receive a single thank you note. Just the odd text message, but mostly nothing.

What is the norm? I always write a thank you note if I go to dinner or a party at someones house so shouldn't children get into the habit? Am I overdoing it?

OP posts:
MorticiaAnnSpookington · 21/10/2008 16:55

I'm with you here Flum - I always,always do it and encourage ds to write thank yous - it's good manners- lots of people will disagree but it's worth being old -fashioned in this respect.

brimfull · 21/10/2008 16:56

yup you're overdoing it

I will thank the parent for a lovely party when I see them next..that's enough I think.
I do phone up hostess of dinner party the day after and thank them though

forevercleaning · 21/10/2008 16:57

i have not sent thank yous for going to childrens parties. I think it is more down to the children whose party it was to write the thank you.

Partygoers hopefully thank the host at the time and that is enough at this age.

Is nice to write a note after n adults party though

Notquitegrownup · 21/10/2008 16:57

It's a lovely thing to do. I used to get my boys to do it, but it has fallen off my radar recently, and so I tend to do the thank you-ing.

beansmum · 21/10/2008 16:58

ds doesn't because I would have to write it and I think that makes it kind of meaningless. Also, he always gets a thank you note for the gift, if I then send a thank you for the party, and then they send a thank you for coming it all gets a bit ridiculous.

compo · 21/10/2008 16:59

no we don't
ds says thank you as he leaves

forevercleaning · 21/10/2008 17:01

and also when you have several dc going to parties each weekend, you will never stop writing!

Anna8888 · 21/10/2008 17:02

No. I don't do and won't do this.

I get intensely annoyed by people who write cards to thank me for lunches, dinners etc. They are invariably the people who have the least pleasant demeanour but are obsessed with formal social niceties. I would rather good manners were simple niceness and a genuine, heartfelt thank you at the end of the party.

CountessDracula · 21/10/2008 17:03

No

CountessDracula · 21/10/2008 17:04

If I have been to stay for a weekend with someone i usually send them a card
Otherwise is OTT IMO

hotCheeseBurns · 21/10/2008 17:06

It never even occured to me to do this!
stressed and worried

Anna8888 · 21/10/2008 17:07

Don't stress. As CD says, it is OTT to do this.

CountessDracula · 21/10/2008 17:08

Flummy we all know you are ott with your personal stationery use though don't we

stillstanding · 21/10/2008 17:08

I do most times but I don't beat myself up over it if I miss one.

How extraordinary to be "intensely annoyed" about receiving one?? I always feel warm and fuzzy and appreciated. Think polite and lovely thing to do but not compulsory.

Anna8888 · 21/10/2008 17:09

Oh yes, the worst sort of thank you note comes on an embossed personal card

GylesBandwidth · 21/10/2008 17:10

Nope.
They say thank you to the hosts as they leave.

NorthernLurker · 21/10/2008 17:12

No we don't and I don't do thank you notes for presents either. We always thank in person and then if they want anything else they'll have to come over here and write it themselves. Gifts should always be acknowledged but where does it say that an acknowledgement that comes without a stamp is less valid?

Bride1 · 21/10/2008 17:18

We don't do this for parties.

wobbegong · 21/10/2008 17:56

I'm a bit sad about the demise of the thank you card to be honest. I treasure the (very few) I get given, and do write them for birthday parties.

Small rant... Two weeks ago I gave two of DH's friends use of a gorgeous country cottage in Devon, because my father was ill and couldn't use it. I said, "don't worry about payment but here is their address, a thank you card would mean so much to them".
Fuck all has arrived so far. I won't bother with them again.

Original poster
Flum · 21/10/2008 18:45

Its very true Countess Dracula re: the stationary. I can never compete with my SIL who sends a gushing two sided thank you card if you make her a cup of tea!

I married into a family that write endlessly about everything and I think it is twisting my mind!

OP posts:
Miyazaki · 21/10/2008 18:48

No, would be never ending. Thank you for the present, thank you for the party, thank you for the thank you. Thank you for the invite.

I do send a thank you if we have stayed over, or for a weekend at a friends type thing. Or flowers or summink.

WideWebWitch · 21/10/2008 18:51

No, life's too short, we haven't got time nad it can become never ending

Liffey · 21/10/2008 18:57

no, but when she had a party, I sent out a photocopied drawing with thank you on it for her presents.

ilovemyghds · 21/10/2008 19:05

No, I am still trying to keep up with the thank yous from when DC3 was born over 3 months ago. Have not yet done thank yous for DSs birthday a month ago (am tagging lots onto DC3s thank you cards or they will never get done!). God knows how far behind I would be if I thanked people for being invited to their party. I always say thank you when I am leaving though.

hotCheeseBurns · 21/10/2008 19:06

That's a good idea Liffey, I think I'll steal it for ds's rapidly approaching first proper party!

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