if your child goes to a classmates house for tea

[cheeryface]

do you return the favour?

Not often.

yes

only if we like the child.

Yes

Have done so so far yes.

Yes

yep

Generally yes, although not always one for one with her closer friends. For example, DD goes to one friend's house every Tuesday (I work later that day) but I don't have that friend round once a week too.

yes

yes

Sometimes but depends no who it is and where they live, as I can't drop them back home.

Yes

yes

hmmm
i don't think my boy is liked
no one ever invites him to play.

a few months ago a boy from his class came for tea and just before half term a different boy came over for a takeaway and a film with ds2.

neither have returned the favour, this morning the 2nd boy was telling me how he had had the twins from their class around at his last night.
ds2 didn't say anything but i know he felt a bit put out.

how old is your ds?

sorry ds2

We're not quite in the realms of this yet - but yes, I know that I will return the favour quite happily.

people tend to come here

occasionally we get returns

when I stop doing playdates (ie inviting people) I am well aware of how much less DS socialises outside school

but then I go OTT and DS has 3 or so a week in general

have decided some people find them hard work (I don't I find it easier with more kids in the house as they entertain each other) so feel intimidated by them

no reason you can't keep inviting children round .. I certainly don't do invite - expect an invite

kind of yeah - if I remember - all a bit slap dash ad hoc though.

I bet he's lovely, perhaps the other boys have lazy parents who don't invite kids over much. I think boys do less of this than girls too. My niece is constantly at sleepovers, but her younger brother only has one friend he sees out of school.

he's 8

tbh i haven't really done it much because he hasn't asked. i started to worry that he hasn't much in the way of friends, that he has never been invited anywhere (a few birthday parties at the local sports hall though)
and as i say have invited 2 different boys but it hasn't helped
because they haven't asked him back

i am pretty shy and most of the mothers only seem to talk if i make the first move and then don't bother themselves the next time at the school gates iyswim, so, have given up pretty much apart from one friend i have there.
so, maybe it's me, i don't know!

My nephew is nearly 8, I reckon it's their age. Just keep asking the nice kids every now and then, I'm sure he'll be fine

cf I was wondering about his age because when they are just starting school it seems to be more about mums who know each other than play-dates that the child chooses.

I would say invite the same children again - you never know it might prompt the mum to say " Oh it's our turn to have ds2 round to tea"

I always try to remember to return the favour.

Neither my ds or dd1 get invited back as much as they invite people over, but I try to invite people over every week (one child home once a week) as both of them have recently started a new school. Also it gives you an opportunity to get to know the other children.