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Original poster

What would you do with a secret you couldn't tell anyone?

51 replies

TornApart75 · 10/01/2019 10:47

I have a secret. I have a loving family, a husband and four children. I have carried the secret around for several years. Most of the time I can put it out of my mind. When I think about it, it drives me nuts.
How would you cope?
Thanks

OP posts:
JiltedJohnsJulie · 11/01/2019 13:26

Tell a priest?

HollowTalk · 11/01/2019 13:28

Tell us! You know you want to Grin

Huntlybyelection · 11/01/2019 13:28

I know secrets about other people. I tell nobody.

Secrets about me? I tell nobody. I've not that many. Mostly just the fact i don't like most people.

Nodrama999 · 11/01/2019 13:29

It depends on the secret I suppose? In the end, secrets don’t really stay as secrets and if it’s causing issues for you then I think your best getting it out. After all, trust is built on honesty.

whilethechiefputsshineonleith · 11/01/2019 13:30

i second telling a priest..

FadedRed · 11/01/2019 13:33

What effect is this having on you? Depends on the implications of the nature of the secret and it’s potential to cause or limit damage to you or others.
Priest/clergyman
Samaritans
Counsellor
Anonymous call to specific support agency helpline
Write it all down and burn the paper

cheercaptain · 11/01/2019 13:34

Depends what or who is affected if its no longer a secret. Distract yourself so you don't have to think about it any longer than is necessary, for as long as you keep it a secret.

Yinv · 11/01/2019 13:35

Are you carrying it for yourself
Or someone else

If it comes out, what will the consequences be?

abetterplace · 11/01/2019 13:36

would the secret harm anyone if it is known (ie is the father of your oldest DC not their biological DF?)

is it likely the secret will get out?
and would it do more harm than good to let it out?

are you able to give us clues? or tell us what it is?

Reallyevilmuffin · 11/01/2019 13:36

You're anonymous here, will get loads of response and as long as you can't be identified fire away. Xmas Smile

Yinv · 11/01/2019 13:36

But if you need to tell someone, I guess Samaritans.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 11/01/2019 13:43

tell MN...listening

GoldenBuns · 11/01/2019 15:18

If it's someone else's secret, you tell no one.

Aprilshowerswontbelong · 11/01/2019 15:21

Depends who's secret it is. If it's affecting your every day life could you tell your dh?

MaraScottie · 11/01/2019 15:22

Tell us. Obvs.

Oddsocksandmeatballs · 11/01/2019 15:29

I was entrusted with a secret many years ago (I wish I hadn't been), I have told no-one in real life and for the most part I try not to think about it but it can be hard. I would second someone like a clergyman or the Samaritans, you can email the Samaritans if you don't want to talk to anyone about it.

ShortandSweet96 · 12/01/2019 20:19

OP, do you know who let the dogs out? Is that's your secret?!

Iloveacurry · 12/01/2019 20:22

Definitely tell us.

greendale17 · 12/01/2019 20:22

Start a thread on MN.

Tiredeyes21 · 12/01/2019 20:22

Totally tell strangers on mumsnet !

MrsBunTheBakersMum · 12/01/2019 20:23

You can’t not tell us now!!

Knittedfairies · 12/01/2019 20:33

What are the consequences of the secret being told?

E20mom · 12/01/2019 20:37

I have a few. I just continue to keep them secret.,

importantkath · 12/01/2019 20:47

A friend shared a secret recently that I wish she hadn't.

I didn't tell anyone in RL though.

Upthepong · 12/01/2019 20:54

I have one. Something I found out accidently about a mutual friend of mine and a close family member. It is not my place to say anything. Friend doesn't know I know. Think along the lines of being a witness to a serious crime (but not that, obviously!). Have kept schtum. After a while it looses it's immediacy and fades into the background. It's not the kind of secret I would have wanted to know. Maybe if it was less horrible I would be more likely to tell someone else. Sorry that you are in a similar position. I try to act honourably and think what if the situation were reversed.