Could menopause be causing this rage and would HRT help?

[Ihavenoideawhatmyusernameis]

I really need to get this out in a place where I’m hoping people understand
I’ve felt rage for weeks - I know why and I don’t like it - I hate myself and I think I’m losing my mind. Tonight after shopping I just lost my cool. While reversing out of my parking space the person behind me who was watching me, pulled his trolley out further behind the car meaning I couldn’t easily get out of the space. He did it deliberately, I could see him on my reverse cam. I’m giving you context but there is no excuse for what happened next 😩

I called him an ignorant dick. His wife called me an ignorant bitch and I just drove off. I’m an awful, awful person…but this isn’t me. I’m going to try and get a gp appointment tomorrow, I know I need something to help. Will HRT help?? I just want to feel like myself. I’ve felt rage for weeks, it’s getting worse and I don’t want to be like this. I should have just let it go. Please be kind…

just for added context I also have brain fog, joint pain, insomnia, itching literally everywhere even inside my ears! Dry throat, eyes and skin, I’m so tired, I have zero tolerance for anything and I don’t think I’ve cried in the last 10 years as much as i have in the last 4-6 weeks. Please tell me it’ll get better 😩😩

Yes you need HRT, have a look at the NHS site and tick off your symptoms. If your GP seems reticent mention hot flushes 🤣 I tried 3 times to get hrt I felt awful it took mentioning hot flushes to get it.

Well he sounded like an ignorant dick. But yes these kind of interactions do you no good.

I found this was my biggest menopause symptom and HRT did help

Yep! I was just the same before HRT. I couldn’t find anywhere to park once and was so angry about it! Then when I found a space I cried for about 15 minutes. I was emotionally all over the place and found it so hard as up until that point I had been so level headed. It’s horrible but HRT should help

Yes. I had the same symptoms & HRT has helped enormously.

See if your GP practice has a menopause specialist.

Thank you all!

I know I need to go - I’ve let it go on for too long.

I’ve had a full on meltdown in town with my husband recently and I should have done to then, I’m so scared

also - omg!! The anxiety!! Wtf!!!

I should add it will get better.
Also time outside, exercise, sleep if you can. I found ashwagandha and magnesium glycinate helped me sleep and calmed me down. I found Mary Clare Haver good for information, she's written books which are very interesting, and has a good website and Instagram page. In the meantime know it's not you it's your hormones and it will make it easier to cope when you feel like yelling or crying. Good luck, it bloody awful.

its thrown me for a loop to be honest. I’ve never really had pms or struggled with periods and I did not expect any of this 😩

For me, HRT helped this pretty much straight away.

OP, I once absolutely lost it on a train - I can hardly believe that it was me who behaved so badly, but fifteen years on (and still ashamed) I do attribute it to the menopause. Thankfully, it was only that once. And the awful roller coaster hormonal feelings do pass.

You poor thing. Yes, HRT will help.

Also I had itchy ears for years and never did much about it then my husband got it and his doctor gave him this spray which cured it for us both. It probably wasn't menopausal but my life is so much better without itchy ears. Mention your ears as well. It used to wake me up because they itched.

My only real menopausal symptom was waking up too early and my doctor gave me HRT very readily, but I am much less easily enraged now, in fact quite chilled out, but that might be because I'm sleeping and not tormented with itchy ears. How you're managing with all the symptoms you list is beyond me, OP. Hope you get some HRT and feel much better very soon.

Yes, HRT will help. My rage has completely disappeared since HRT kicked in. HOWEVER, it can take up to 12 weeks to feel the effects so please stick with it

The itchy thing is definitely menopause and one l wasn't ready for but that did ease after a while. But it's a difficult one to deal with.

Yes on the hrt and menopause but alsii ok stop and ask yourself about your life, stress, sleep, water intake, do you get a break in life etc. Gp said it to me and I broke down crying that night thinking of how I don’t look after myself or treat myself the way I did when I was younger, because of work and kids and family health stuff and money there’s no time to think, I don’t have time to just go for walks or runs or take long showers or go for a hair appointment or to the beautician, I don’t see friends and family a lot, I don’t drink water, exercise etc etc etc. I’ve an appointment about hrt but very aware a lot of things are me being on edge and running non stop

Ps you are not an awful person x

Yea! Take the hrt.

that man was a dick but take it before you get angry at someone you care about

I always think what's especialyl annoying about the rage is that whatever sets it off genuinely is a perfectly rational reason for being annoyed. But the OTT response... my DH and DC were the recipients a couple of itmes. Thank god the HRT helped that one almost immediately. Although o've nticed it creeping back - and am looking forward to a review of my HRT in a few weeks to discuss.

My friends and DH started calling me Muffin because I was having massive meltdowns like the character in Bluey. It was honestly like being a toddler or going through puberty again with the mood swings, rage, anxiety and paranoia. HRT honestly saved me, my marriage and my friendships.

Yes the paranoia - my friends hate me etc 😆 Honestly, the stuff that went through my head

I became petty, insufferable, argumentative, have oanic attacks and really unlikeable as my menopause started.

I started getting really frightened about going to work and yet once i walked in everything was normal. Colleagues said hi, made me a brew, chat about plans etc
Before going in I used to convince myself everyone hated me etc, especially if I had a couple of days, due to my shift ,off mid week.

I definitely needed HRT to make my normal personality return. The rage was the first to ho but the anxiety attacks were the last to leave but I learned how to manage them.

Its nice being back to normal. I enjoy work and my colleagues again, I make social plans and I am happy once more.

Thank you all - this has given me so much to think about and a lot of what you’ve all said really resonates with me.

I had a few anger episodes before someone suggested hrt, If I miss changing my patch I start feeling irritable so yes it’s hormonal 100%

Yes and yes. My rage was horrendous. It is almost gone now after 6 weeks on Evorel.

I’ve been on HRT for over a year and actually my rage is worse now than it was then!! I just don’t know what to do? I’m on 2mg of Elleste Duet. It just makes me feel like I’m permanently in a dark hole. I’ve never had this before. Any advice? Thank you 🙏🏻

I had worse rage when taking HRT. I couldn’t manage the progesterone.

And in hindsight you will be glad - I was once I realised the full preventative health benefits of HRT.

Protects against Dementia, Heart Disease, Osteoporosis, Cancers, Diabetes, autoimmune diseases etc etc.