Should long-term unmarried couples have the same rights as married couples?

[EverymanJustice]

I was reading that the government is looking at giving more legal rights to unmarried couples who live together for years or have children together.
Do you think that's a good idea?
If a couple have lived together for 10 or 20 years and built a life together, should they have similar rights to a married couple if they separate?
Or should marriage remain different?

I’ve signed. Are there any other petitions floating around? I’ll be writing to my MP as well. We all need to fight this. None of us asked for this and I hate the way it feels like it’s been hidden in the manifesto. They certainly didn’t publicise the consultation well either. If it goes through I will never vote labour ever again. I’m disgusted.

I couldn’t find any other petitions but I will keep looking and if I come across any I will post on here x

Infantilising. People need to take responsibility for protecting their own interests. Agree with pp the maintenance system needs to be improved that will be of more help to the group they want to assist.

I think the current system is broken and needs amending.

From April next year it is only going to get worse when pensions are included in IHT.

I and quite a few other couples I know have been forced to get married or have a civil partnership almost against our will because failure to do so will result in a huge 6 figure IHT bill which wasn’t previously the case.

But what would you amend?

Not introducing the ridiculously punitive pension IHT rules would be a start but that won’t happen so what needs to be in place is some form of cohabitation exemption.

Couples who have lived together for a certain period of time and/or have children together can apply for a cohabitation exemption. This prevents people being inadvertently caught against their will but also provides protection where needed.

Countries such as France and Ireland have similar schemes in place.

I think after happily living together for over 20
years without ever wanting or needing to get married it’s ridiculous that I now have to get married solely because of the current government’s policy on pension inheritance.

But that’s what a civil partnership agreement is if you don’t want marriage. It just feels like this is such a waste of government and civil service time when there is already a solution to the problem

Civil Partnership is just marriage without any religious nonsense.

I just wanted something akin to updating my will to protect me. It’s ridiculous to have to through a marriage or CP ceremony pretty much against my will purely due to government tax policy.

Correct.

The thing with an opt in is that, to the extent there's a wider issue, it doesn't even really solve that. You can already have an alternative to marriage that gives you the same rights in the UK wrt IHT. Getting a CP on the quiet and not telling anyone is right there, has been for years.

People who don't avail themselves of that because they never get round to it, die younger and suddenly before thinking of these things, whose lives are too chaotic, lack knowledge or just hold views about the state being involved in their relationships still won't sort the exemption out. People who want to withhold legal recognition from a partner as a means of control will still be able to do that.

@SamTR1 realistically if you want the state involved, it's not going to be akin to updating a will. There'd have to be a registration process and checks. State recognition of a relationship can't function in the same private way that making a will with a solicitor can.

My colleague is doing a CP and they are just going on, signing the documents and going home because they see it for what it is - a way of legally recognising their partnership

and I have a marriage certificate but had a civil ceremony so no ‘religious nonsense’

the difference between a civil partnership and a cohabitation agreement you talk of is pretty much the name

Same . Our wedding was not for romantic reasons at all . We'd been together 20+ years and it was solely to get a piece of paper to make " us " legal .

For every issue these proposals apparently ‘fix’ will create other (in my view unforgivable) issues. People should not have this forced on them. My children come first regardless of who I meet in the future. Everything I’ve worked my tail end off for is for our security and stability (mine and the children). It doesn’t matter how old my children get, they will come first and my assets will pass to them. That is how I want it. If this ridiculous bill goes ahead, it means if I meet someone in the future we can never live together and have companionship through fear of disinheriting our own children. That is absurd. Let adults make their own arrangements according to their own individual circumstances. The majority should not be punished for the sake of protecting a few situations here and there.

It's true, this is inherently about choosing which group of people end up getting disadvantaged. Whatever option the state chooses, there are going to be people who end up falling foul of it. I'd be more persuaded by advocates for change if they'd be honest about this and explain why they think we should change the screwed over cohort.

i definitely wouldnt support this. i didn’t marry my ex and father to my child. we had both been married before so weren’t especially keen and as the relationship went on it was apparent he was never going to pull his weight financially and i become sole breadwinner with a very healthy pension which he thought he would live off when the time came. bringing up a conversation about protecting my assets from him would have been risky (a different story) but remaining indifferent and vague about marriage did the trick while i managed my exit strategy. he doesn’t pay child maintenance, he doesn’t work legally and has set up with another woman who sensibly hasn’t married him either.
while i see the narrative on MN being have kids, get married but that’s not right for everyone. those women who give up all their earning power and financial independence and remain unmarried are taking a risk but relationships are complex and can be full of power imbalances.

This is a terrible idea. If people want those rights they get married . Forcing them on people is a shocking idea.

Are the results/recommendations from the consultation out yet? I believed it closed last month.

https://www.gov.uk/government/consultations/a-fairer-end-to-relationships

Not that I know of. Stuff like that often takes a few months to be collated.

I really hope they heed the public sentiment on this. It is overwhelmingly against the proposals and it could be political suicode. They barely publicised the consultation and that in itself was bad enough.

I’m really against this too.

Im 45 and was widowed nearly 2 years ago. I have a 13 year old child. I work full time and I’m not rich, but I am in a decent place financially - largely due to my late husbands pensions and life insurance. Safeguarding mine and my child’s financial security is hugely important to me, especially given the trauma we have been through and the repercussions that are still ongoing.

I”m not in or looking for a new relationship now - but obviously this might change. I would definitely change how I conduct future relationships due to any changes in the law. And I think that’s a shame really.

Ultimately all this will do is force couples to enter into a legal agreement so their assets aren’t shared

i just think the current default works better - don’t want to merge finances then don’t get married or have a CP.

I'm not a particularly romantic person so I married because I wanted the rights marriage would bring as I knew I wanted kids with DH and I knew I would be primary carer so I would be the one taking the financial hit.

rather than change the law it would be better to educate people - getting rid of this idea of a common law wife for example

I’m also utterly shocked that this is on the governments agenda given the state of the world at the moment. Surely they’ve got better and bigger things to do with their time than putting their energies into this. It beggars belief, it really does.