anyone good at dry/witty responses re lots of kids?

[whyismymindblank]

Just found out I'm pg with dc4 - very pleased, if a little nervous! One of the things I'm nervous about is what people will say... I already get the mick taken about having 3! I could do with having some responses to hand rather than thinking of them an hour later like I normally would (obviously this is all pretty minor compared with all the things I probably should be worrying about!)

"I know, I'm just so good at raising a family!"

"The more we have, the better chance one of them will turn out a millionaire and we can retire to a yacht in the Caribbean"

"What do you mean? We've hardly got started yet!"

Disclaimer: I'm pg with my first so don't know if these work

particularly like no.2!

Now you need to practice endlessly in front of a mirror so you can launch it at the next rude twat person to comment :o

I'm only pregnant with DC3 so not a 'larger' family but the comments for me have already started, especially as I already have a boy and a girl. A couple of people have said things like 'don't you know when to stop?' 'you already have one of each, you don't need any more' and other such charming things.
Depending on who has said it I vary my response.
I quite like embarrassing the offender with 'yes, I just love making babies and let's face it the results are great!'
I think people think they're being funny and original.

"Well, we don't have a telly, so we need to do something in the evenings"

I have five and get lots of comments, almost always positive. Most comments are about the twins fighting in the shopping trolley or the constant chitter chatter that follows me arund. I usually just smile at people at say 'ha ha, just be thankful you aren't our neighbours!'.

I have 5 and when I was preg the last time I had numerous people say "don't you have a telly?" My reply "yes, it's on my bedroom wall"
That shut them up!

Congratulations! Try and ignore them. I know it's hard though!

Just found out I'm having number 6. TOTAL shocker. Gawd knows what I'll hear this time

Say nothing back&smile...

I have 5dc...

Pochemuchka yes, they're the kind of comments I had when pg last time (dc 1 & 2 are a boy & girl, so obv why should I want any more?!). Been asked if I need contraceptive advice etc.

Melindaaa you're right, lots of people have lovely reactions - it's just the few, thankfully :)

NotShort congratulations!

Comments we had when announcing third pregnancy.

"Haven't you guys heard of contraception?"

"Was it a lovely little accident?"

My MIL said recently we were bring greedy having 3! I didn't even think 3 was a big family. I was genuinely a bit put out by the number of people, including a couple of midwives on routine appointments, who assumed it was an unplanned pregnancy.

I like Pidjins millionaire comment and will be testing I next time someone says something snarky!

When I was pg with no five at 43 I had a lot of are you mad etc. One day I snapped and said "why because im pregnant with my new husbands baby at 43 after chemo yes fucking mental!"

LOVE THESE
whyismymindblank I am in the same position as you and just know that my boss is going to say something - he always jokes about all the women not being allowed any more..(really is joking though) even though he has 4 himself, just need something to say back to his (admittedly witty) comment.
I like the millionaire one...

At least your boss has 4 and is joking twirlie, this week mine told me about someone his wife works with who's got 4 and how he thinks that's unreasonable (having 4lots of mat leave...). Can't say I'm looking forward to telling him this time. He was ok about the first 3 though... Why is it that we're not allowed more than 2, 3 tops?

Cough and say well actually it's numbers 4,5 and 6. Three for the price of one.

My friend has 3 girls under 4, and gets the "Haven't you got a telly" line. She said "Yes but I prefer shagging" last time someone trotted it out.

'prefer shagging'

yes! That's sooo what I'm going to say when I get the telly comment :)
pick that'd be good for a laugh, but I'd be worried there might end up being some truth in it!

I have 9 andpregnant with 10 and 11. I just tell people I want an all girl footy team (I only have 1DS). or say it'sbetter than hiring a cleaner lol

CONGRATULATIONS
I'm expecting number 4 and the comments flow but i absolutely love Melindaaa response: Just be thankful you aren't are neighbours!, I will use this all the time now love it!!!

When we moved into our 3 bed semi, with 4 children and preg with no 5, our neighbour commented that he felt one of the bigger houses up the road would be more suitable than living next to him. My sister-in-law told him it was fine because the other children (who I don't really have) don't mind living in the tents in the garden when they are home from boarding school. After her comment I think he was just gratefull I didn't really have any more.

Love the comment about preferring shagging to telly. I will def use that one.

You could feign shock and say "oh shit, I didn't realise it was the law to only have two children"

or the old MN classic "did you mean that to sound so rude"

Haha I came on to give the millionaire line only to find it already in use!
My other response to 'why do you have so many children??' is 'just to irritate you'...

I have 4 who were under 5 until a month ago

Going around Asda the other day an old lady stopped to say how well behaved they were only to part with the classic '3 girls then a boy? At least you did the right thing at the end then..' wtf?!

In response to the tv question, I'd be tempted to tell them if they don't find sex more fun than watching tv they're doing something wrong...

I have two girls under two and I get the "oh make sure you get contraception now. You don't want to be pregnant again yet do you??? Like its a bad thing?! My girls are my world! And dp's! The people saying don't even have kids!

I'm also pg with #4. I have 3 boys so far, so don't get me started on the 'are you keeping going until you have a girl' comments (my answer to that is no, I'm not coleecting a set')

I often feel that people assume you are feckless with lots of children, whereas I have plenty of feck thank you very much. I just remind them I'm breeding tax payers, and they'll be glad of it when they try to claim a pension.