anyone good at dry/witty responses re lots of kids?

[whyismymindblank]

Just found out I'm pg with dc4 - very pleased, if a little nervous! One of the things I'm nervous about is what people will say... I already get the mick taken about having 3! I could do with having some responses to hand rather than thinking of them an hour later like I normally would (obviously this is all pretty minor compared with all the things I probably should be worrying about!)

[MayTheOddsBeEverInYourFavour]

We have six (five boys and a girl)

We get a lot of comments, DH loves using the tv one 'wow don't you have a tv
.' 'yes but I prefer fucking my wife' they never argue with that one

Congrats on number 4!

I always tell people if they ask that my first few children were so incredibly amazing why wouldn't I want more? They don't usually argue with that either

I would never say this normally but if someone with 1/2/3 children was being really nasty about me having a big family I'd use the ' well I can totally understand why you couldn't cope with/ wouldn't want more' complete with a sneery look,but as I say that one is reserved for people who are being genuinely vicious

I think a lot of the time people don't think anything of it and are just making conversation, but yes it can get tedious

[SilentMammoth]

I just say, "yes, aren't I lucky?" And dare them to suggest otherwise. Because I'm very lucky.

[MatureUniStudent]

I just used to pretend they wern't mine. That I was the childminder. Stopped the "Telly/Catholic/you must like sex/be a glutton for punishment/selfishly destroying the environment" comments. My favourite was the "selfish taking so much child benefit when I have no children/one child and have to pay for your children" when I would reply "well my four will make up for your not having chidlren/only having one when it comes to them working and paying for your pension in your old age".

It was rare and always so lovely to have people congratulate me on having a big family and saying how lovely it was to see them all together.

[BlackholesAndRevelations]

Oh gosh I'm only newly pg with no 3 and am totally not looking forward to the comments about why would we want another (got a boy and a girl already).

[AreYouADurtBirdOrALadyBird]

''Are you pregnant again?''

Response: yep I've no idea what's causing it.

[Reaa]

We have 7 and I get the "don't you have a tv" comment a lot so I now reply "yes but we also have sky tv and its all repeats"

And my fav-I should at least be guaranteed one grandchild

[Reaa]

I also get...oh you are so lucky I wish I could have that many, would love to have a large family like you.

[Labro]

I'm youngest of 6 - growing up we had

are you catholic
are you more than one family
blimey your parents must have been at it like rabbits
didn't they have a telly

and the all time best one? My geography teacher asking me when I was 16 if there were any more of us (he'd taught all 6) then when I said no, I was the last, he looked at me and asked me if I was sure!!!

My mums favourite response was the football team one and that she fancied being looked after in her old age.

[Sleepysand]

I have 4. I used to look people in the eyes and tell them we had lots of sex.

Re the ones who bang on about child benefits, and how I don't pay for their dog so why do they pay for my kids, I usually point out that one day my kids will pay for their healthcare and to let me know what their dog will be doing then.

[NynaevesSister]

Is really interesting to come in here from single child forum to find more or less the same sorts of threads. Why do people feel this is their business? After I had my son I knew in my heart my family was complete. I expect it is the same if you have five or ten, surely? It was a surprise to me as growing up I was always sure I wanted a small family - just 4! Coming from 6 that seemed small to me.

[Aethelfleda]

I've got three and the huge majority of people seem to think that the sole reason for having three was "to get a boy"...I know that is a whole other thread, but it is almost always followed by "ooh, but you're done now, aren't you!!" which is incredibly presumptive. People DO presume though, it's just human nature and gossip.

I'm amazed that so many people exclaim at me for having three. It's a drop in the ocean compared to six or seven, but any more than the person has themself is clearly a big deal. "wow, you've got your hands full"... I usually reply that it's fine cos I'm sending DD1 down the pit, DD2 up the chimney, and teaching DS (aged 1) to make the beds, so they bring in a good income....

[CherryPie3]

We have 3 children (2 boys, 1 girl)a nd live in a village where it's normal to stop at 1 or 2 at the most.

I have to say the only comments I have ever got are;

"you're so lucky, we would have loved to have more"

"what well behaved children you have"

"Will you be trying for another girl to balance it out?"


I can't complain with that really? xx

[determinedma]

My sis has five. What is funny is that she has on brunette, one red head, one bottle blond,one mousey and one chestnut. She get s LOADS of comments.....