Life skills

[bodiddly]

Looking ahead to September and my teenager is likely, grades permitting, to head off to university. What life skills do you think an 18 year old should have - looking for the obvious such as cooking etc and budgeting and maybe some less usual?

Laundry, cleaning a toilet, leaving a shared bathroom and kitchen as you would hope to find it, basic recipes, best before and use by dates, basic first aid and self care.

Ok, so we have most of those covered. Definitely need a few more recipes and some budgeting/meal planning.

Basic idea of how to use washing machine.

Ability to contact GP or other health care providers.

He is ok with the washing machine but health care appointments are worth a discussion, thanks.

food shopping

I guess some basic form of meal planning goes hand in hand with shopping. I read the average student spends £25 a week on groceries and toiletries etc. My ds has a huge appetite so that is going to be particularly challenging.

Is he planning to self cater or go into catered accommodation? Most students soon find the number for takeaways and deliveroo!

I'm not sure yet as some of the unis he has applied for only have self catered options.

He would be a natural at Deliveroo selection but he won't be able to afford to stretch to that often.

My ds has started booking and going to the barbers and opticians on his own. If he doesn't go to the opticians then they won't send him more contact lenses so it's in his interest to go to check ups.
He's expected to come up with a list of ingredients before I get my groceries delivered. Then he's encouraged to eat those foods in order of best before. So if he orders a baguette, he should probably eat it on the same day or next day at the latest. He's expected to check if we have ingredients in. So if the eggs go off on Friday and groceries are delivered on Thursday then best to order some eggs.
He irons his own clothes and washes them the day before he needs them.
It's up to him to tell me what he's run out of and to understand that if it's needed at short notice then he might need to go out and get it. I work near "the shops" so can pick things up in good time but I won't normally go back out because he's run out of gum or something. He can wait until my next working day or pick some up on the way to school. (He passes some shops)

Problem solving, the ability to be thrown into a situation you don't have experience of and work out how to get through it.

Stuff like
You wake up in the morning and the showers not working because there's no water what do you do?

• is it just the shower - check other taps to see if they have water.
• if there's no water at all - check online to see if there's an outage in the area
• if there's no outage in the area - find the contact details for the accommodation maintenance team
• make a call to the maintenance team to arrange repairs

Basically being able to figure their way through an issue, might not get it right first time but take a step back and ask questions to find a solution

• what has happened
• how has it happened, how does it affect my plans
• when did it happen, when does it need to be fixed by
• who needs to know about it, who can help, who caused the issue

.....

He knows how to prepare a return for an online order. Eg Boohoo
He will send me the qr code

He knows to consider delivery subscription for the sites he uses most eg Boohoo

He knows to check online banking

He knows what day he can expect money coming into his bank acount and that a bank holiday might delay a payment. (he has pocket money from his dad, pocket money from me and wages from his job)

He knows how to take public transport

Ooh problem solving is a
Good one, he is clueless with things like that. Harder to teach but your post was useful, thank you.

Online order returns have been done before but not consistently and reliant on me checking it. That's definitely worth considering, thanks.

Self advocacy.
It helps if they have to go to the GP etc, but also making it through the university system- if their course isn't all it should be, can they work with the class rep to challenge things. Can they work out how to get support from student services or the union.

Knowing their own mind and not feeling like they have to espouse opinions that they aren't comfortable with to fit in.

How to perform as per expectations for their course. Time management - backwards planning to get somewhere like a seminar on time.
Using blackboard or whatever to view course materials and see what they're going to be assessed on, so they have that in mind all the way through the course.
Checking written information to see if their question is already answered before e-mailing a lecturer.
Looking at an assignment specification and working out how to tick all the boxes.

Waiting until everyone who wants to exit gets off a bus or train before getting on.

Taking advantage of student discounts, bargains, and using things like Olio while being polite.

Budgeting
Washing machine
Food shopping & basic cooking - omelettes, stir frys, curries, sausage & mash
Basic first aid - hangover cures, rehydration, how to disinfect a cut, when to call 111, buy them a kit & a book
Basic domestic cleaning ie washing up, how to clean a loo, change a duvet cover etc
Basic physical security

How to hand sew on a button/ polish shoes/change a bulb/change a fuse.

I did wonder about a fuse but aren't all plugs sealed units nowadays?

How to check a fuse box?

How to write an email properly if he needs tk contact a course tutor

forward planning e.g. big nights out all week the essays due so doing it in advance. Notion or a paper diary can help with this.

navigating online systems

CVs, interview skills

being proactive

What to do with a very drunk or drugged up friend also

Bunny some of those are the biggest challenge as he has ADHD and forward planning, organising, timekeeping are all really tricky - not entirely sure how we are going to get round it but he has to get out there and get on with it at some point.

Ha ha he already has experience of drunken drugged up friends -
He went to Reading Festival last year!

Has he applied for DSA yet? Maybe focus on accessing any help and support the Student Support team offers. Not being afraid to flag concerns to them and personal tutor.

Not all plugs are sealed (and yes, I thought all new plugs were sealed as per some obscure regulation!) and cars/motorbikes also have fuses that can need changing. — basic car maintenance might also be good, even if he can’t drive. Such as windscreen bottle/oil check/spotting worn tyres.
good idea about learning how a modern house main fuse box works and how to read meters and use stop cocks.

Is he likely to make himself known to the disability office? They could assess him and may provide assistance with executive planning.

Life skills - small talk, not to drink to oblivion or take drugs (or at least only to do so if you've decided to in advance), basic first aid (recovery position at least if faced with a comatose puking flatmate), what safe and consensual sex looks like.