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Snakes on a Plane - it makes NO sense

62 replies

Hassled · 13/06/2015 21:58

Anyone watching? Why are there so many snakes?
Why did they escape from an exploding box in the hold below but then get into the main bit from above shagging in the loo couple?
How were shagging couple shagging while she was wearing shorts?
Why didn't they use the dog as bait? Why wasn't the dog in the hold?
Why are they all so useless?

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 15/06/2015 00:43

Thanks to Wiki I can confirm that it is indeed Adrift!

What a disappointment! I just read the plot and I was shouting at Wiki so I dont think I need to see the film, I thought there might have been a mad shark or spirit of the sea bumping them off, turns out they were just really fecking stupid!

For a start surely that premise would never happen because arent the ladders permanently fixed on boats purely to prevent this kind of thing? The way they were managing to kill each other, send the heaviest man up the swimming costume rope, not bunking him up, committing guilt based suicide, abandoning the baby to save same pillock brained guilt based suicide.......I suspect I would need a new TV after the first half an hour due to me chucking stuff at it :o

DidoTheDodo · 15/06/2015 07:01

It is just two scary things lumped together. I go for "Clowns go Potholing" as a better concept.

Worst film ever is "Shark in Venice". You must see that one.

Nolim · 15/06/2015 07:08

Snakes of a plane is hilauriosly bad. Like the writer put pieces of paper with words on a hat and he took two random ones and tried to make a movie out of it.

scrappydappydoo · 15/06/2015 07:18

Op you have to watch 'Sharknado' really you do. I spent the whole film going 'what?!! Why??!! How??!!'

Maryz · 15/06/2015 07:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hassled · 15/06/2015 09:39

:o trufflesnout.

to this thread I've learned of a whole new film genre to get my teeth into - I especially like the sound of Poseidon Rex. DS2 told me that in Sharknado 2 (oddly he hasn't seen Sharknado 1) someone revs up some chainsaws and lobs them into the tornado - now that's got to be worth seeing.

Dead Calm freaked the hell out of me. Fun fact for the day - Tom Cruise liked Nicole Kidman in it so much he made her be his wife. So a film she probably regretted making for multiple reasons.

OP posts:
TaliZorahVasNormandy · 15/06/2015 09:53

Under Siege that was Maryz.

Maryz · 15/06/2015 10:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FatherReboolaConundrum · 15/06/2015 10:48

I love the fact that they apparently reshot bots of Snakes on a Plane to add in suggestions being made by fans. This line was suggested by fans who felt that Samuel L. Jackson should be more Samuel L. Jackson-y:

KatherineMumsnet · 15/06/2015 14:22

Hi all,

With the permission of the OP, we are going to move this over to our rather spiffy new Films topic.

Thanks!

Hassled · 15/06/2015 17:34

I've been Youtubing, as you do, and stumbled across the trailer for another quality film - Zombeavers. It includes the line "we can not turn against each other now. That is exactly what the beavers would want". As I said, quality.

I've also found Big Ass Spider which has the one nice bloke from Heroes in it and a reconstruction of the King Kong on a skyscraper scene (except with a big ass spider). Looks like it has potential.

OP posts:
TwigletLola · 17/06/2015 10:52

I watched Zonbeavers the other day (it's on Sky Movies) and it was so incredibly terrible but definitely worth watching! I can't believe no one has mentioned Deep Blue Sea which also has Samuel L Jackson in, it's one of my favourite films!

Does anyone else listen to the podcast "How did this get made"? It's all about terrible films like Sharknado and it's hilarious.

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