I thought I was doing really well but it feels like everything is slipping again and I am so tired and fed up of being in pain.
Have had my Painkillers changed again and the doctor was talking about me being on AD's indefinately. My head is all over the place and I can't get it to stop and it feels really scary.
I went on a thread yesterday that I wouldn't normally dream of going on, because H had done something really insensitive and I was mad, but there was no point in talking about it and then I got really stressed and had the posts deleted and feel ashamed of myself.
I just feel like crying.
My in-laws are being difficult about christmas again, despite the fact that I have tried to be accomadating which means either we have to drag the children around in the car for two days or they don't get to spend it together as a 'family' as H has to ferry his mum everywhere.
My children went to a party and were given coca-cola, despite the fact that evry one knows they don't have it and now thay will be hyper for a few days when they are stressed enough about christmas.
I really really want to go somewhere quiet and just get my head straight and I hate feeling like this.
Someone rang me last night at 7.30 to do with my website and H was not impressed. It is not like this guy was doing anything wrong....H could easily have answered the phone, but we were laughing and I know H was annoyed. I have told H everything about the progress of things but he is getting antsy and I just want to get my 'career' back of the ground and it feels tainted.
I didn't feel very well and went to bed early, and just want to sleep until it all feels better.
oh god this is crap. i wish my head would stop spinning before things get anymore out of control. I hate being me sometimes. Someone stop the spinning please.