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Mental health

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Original poster

Worried about my friend...what can I say to her?

9 replies

TheCattleWereLowryn · 21/12/2004 19:54

I called my friend the other day to let her know my new telephone number (I've just moved away) and she sounded so upset. She gets depression, and had a miscarriage not that long ago.
She was rambling and crying and I couldn't understand her very well. I sent her an email just to send her a virtual hug and this morning there was a terrible email from her. Terrible for her, not for me IYSWIM...
She said that she may be dead soon, and was worried that her son may die, and then said that she didn't feel needed.
What can I say to her? Can anyone give me some words that may help. I can't be there for her now I have moved and I feel useless.

OP posts:

Kaysleighbells · 21/12/2004 20:01

Do you know someone near to her that you can contact? Poor girl. And poor you

feastofstevenmom · 21/12/2004 20:04

I think I agree with Kayleigh. The poor girl sounds very very depressed, and she could do with speaking to her HV/GP quite urgently. I don't think that there are any magic words that can help - just a case of listening to her, trying to distract her a bit if that's possible, and not to try to minimise her problems/and not to tell her to "pull herself together".

IwigitcouldbeXmaseveryday · 21/12/2004 20:37

Message deleted

FimboCLAUS · 21/12/2004 20:42

Is there anyone you both know who could go round and check up on her. Could you contact her DP/DH at work?

Original poster

TheCattleWereLowryn · 23/12/2004 08:07

I'm going to have to try something. I have just had several alarming emails on my pc this morning and she is either delusional or in desperate need of help.
So sad.

OP posts:

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 23/12/2004 08:56

What about her partner? Can you talk to her partner? or another family member (who she is close to)

Or can you speak to her doctor's surgery (if you know who it is)

Maybe call The Samaritans or similar helpline and ask who you can speak to who might be able to help

Original poster

TheCattleWereLowryn · 23/12/2004 19:29

Ah, I can't get hold of anyone. She told me in her last email that she was being taken to the local looney bin and that her DS was going to stay with his grandparents, but added HELP ME at the bottom.
SO confused

OP posts:

FeastofStevenmom · 23/12/2004 19:33

lowryn - so sorry that you and your friend are in this situation. sounds from her e-mail as if she may have been admitted as an inpatient to the local psychiatric hospital, which will at least mean that (touch wood she is now in a safe place and will have access to the help she needs to get better) is there anyone you can ring to confirm this?

TwasTheNightBeforeXmasOwl · 24/12/2004 03:05

its not so much what you say but more the fact that you can be there for her...and you still can. for someone so desperate a supportive email or better still a phonecall can make all the difference. its obvious that you care a great deal. tell her how much she is needed and wanted and make it very clear that you do care...make it clear that although you have moved away you'll always be there for her...perhaps try and remind her of times shes helped other people and how much she is worth..tell her how you can help her through this? its not going to solve everything but it could help a lot.

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