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Feeling so suicidal, my children are keeping me here

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Justdontknowanymo · 07/04/2023 02:46

I had a nervous breakdown over Xmas. I have been much better but tonight it’s just got too much.

children are 2.5 and 10 months. The baby has been awake for the last 3 hours, just a terrible sleeper.

I am due to go back to work but absolutely hate my job. It makes me feel so unfulfilled, and it’s so fucking boring.

I absolutely cannot stand my DH. He talks to me like a piece of shit and has no respect for me. We argue, he apologises, rinse and repeat.

family only want to know me for nice times and pleasantries. They can’t deal with me like this, and have pretty much been ignoring all of this.

have some great friends but they’re up to their necks in their own lives which is fair enough.

I just don’t want to be here anymore. The only reason I am is for my kids.

was given a box of setraline at Xmas but DH and family told me that I didn’t want to start getting ‘hooked’ on that stuff. They basically wouldn’t support me at all in taking it. Had 10 sessions of CBT, it sort of helped, but doesn’t change any of the above.

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MNHQ

DawnMumsnet · 07/04/2023 08:34

Hi Justdontknowanymo,

We're sorry you're feeling so low. We can see you're getting a lot of good advice and support on this thread from other Mumsnetters, but we just wanted to add a few links which might be of help.

Here's a link to our general Mental Health webguide which lists lots of organisations which can provide some real life support.

If you're feeling really low, please call the Samaritans on 116 123. You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected].

We also wanted to include a link to Women's Aid - we know they've helped many Mumsnetters in the past so please take a look at the support available on their website.

And finally, sorry for bombarding you with links but as you've said your baby is just ten months old we thought it might help if we point you in the direction of an organisation called PANDAS Foundation which was set up to support families through pre- and post-natal depression. They have a free helpline, available 7 days a week, from 11am-10pm - 0808 1961 776. They can also provide support by email.

We really hope you're okay, OP. Flowers

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