Adult aspergers referral what to expect

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I can only tell you my experience as a partner, when DH had his.
We went to the MH team and sat with a lady (not sure what her job title was) and discussed DH's childhood, his habits, OCD traits, his relationship with others, his understanding of humour / jokes, how he copes with change - I only have a vague recollection,

It took approximately 5 visits (this was maybe 15 years ago) and at the end, they agreed he probably had all traits associated with aspergers. And that was it. No recommendation, no nothing.

At the time, I was a little annoyed, but MH services are stretched where we are and a friend was going nuts with how little support her teen bipolar DS was receiving - it, therefore, felt bad for us to take resources away from kids. We did a lot of self-study at that point, which helped a bit (or taught us how to adjust).

I had an informal interview first. Then I had to fill out various screening questionaires, for BPD, OCD, depression etc and autism, so AQ test, EQ test and another similar one but with a lot more questions. Then there was a formal interview. The whole thing took about 2.5 hours and I got the diagnosis at the end.

I don't have any direct experience, but if you go to the Special Needs section and click on "Mumsnetters with SN", plenty of people on there have gone through adult Aspergers assessments.