Ok bare with me here because I know this is crazy but I can’t move on. Also the below is quite gruesome so please be safe when reading.
About 2 weeks ago I had a “flashback” of murdering a man, chopping up his body, putting it in hesian sacks and in the boot of my car. It was so vivid and realistic and I felt all panicky and sick that somebody would find out.
Now in my sane moments like now I know this didn’t happen and it’s just my crazy mind making things up but I also have huge stretches of time where it feels real and I feel terrified that someone is going to find out. I think about going to the police to hand myself in and today spent about 20 sat outside a police station fighting myself in whether to go in or not.
Just so I don’t drip feed I have a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder and I am on various medications for this.
I just don’t no what to do. How do I get rid of these thoughts and the guilty sick feeling I have.