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Original poster

So sick of the sound of DS2 crying...

17 replies

MrsHelsBels74 · 26/04/2013 11:29

I feel broken. DS2 is tired but hates napping & just cries & cries when I try & get him to sleep. He's also pulling my hair which I'm getting irrationally angry about. My hair isn't long enough to tie back & even when I clip it he manages to yank it.

I just can't cope with the sound of his crying any more, I just want to run. If I tell DH how I feel he just dismisses it & tells me it will be ok.

Am getting a lot of support for PND but just need to vent & know I'm not the only one to feel like this.

OP posts:
CreatureRetorts · 26/04/2013 18:48

I felt like this when my dd was young. In the end I had to take her out for naps in the sling as I couldnt face it (I had a toddler too). So in sling, go for a walk and she'd usually be asleep quite quickly.

Lucyellensmum95 · 26/04/2013 18:59

Could you stick him in his pram and take him for a walk? Yes he might scream but he wont be able to grab at your hair, it will be outside so wont sound so loud? I know its horrible and your DH really shouldn't be dismissive. How old is your DS?

Original poster
MrsHelsBels74 · 26/04/2013 19:15

DS2 is 7 months. Eventually got him to sleep but not before he'd reduced me to tears, and then once you're in tears the last thing you want to do is step outside your front door...& so it goes on Sad

OP posts:
Lucyellensmum95 · 26/04/2013 19:25

its so hard, this age, but it will pass - you know that its OK to put him in the cot and leave him to cry for ten minutes while you gather yoru thoughts. Are you managing to eat regularly? I find it difficult to cope if im hungry and with a demanding baby you often forget to feed yourself.

You say you are getting good support for PND, this is good, what support are you receiving? Do you have a local surestart in your area?

MumWithCamera · 26/04/2013 23:55

earplugs! and before anyone is shocked, I don't suggest you leave ds to cry it out, but the earplugs can take the edge off the anxiety the crying can induce in you. you can still hear him and cuddle him but its not so intense.

I had terrible pnd and found my dd crying brought an almost visceral reaction in me, I just wanted to run the other way because it made me feel so panicked. to some degree of course that's true of every mum but I think for some mums with pnd its an extreme reaction and I was one of those Sad

MumWithCamera · 26/04/2013 23:56

so no, you are NOT the only one to feel this way! sorry though, I know how tough it can be Sad

PeneloPeePitstop · 27/04/2013 00:01

DS2 did this. Turns out he has ADHD. Please ont think I'm saying that's what it is though Smile

I ended up ringing Crysis. They were literally sanity savers. 08451 228 669 between 9amand 10pm or www.cry-sis.org.uk

Tryharder · 27/04/2013 09:46

Ok. I am not being flippant here but if he doesn't want to nap, then why try and make him? Put him in the pushchair, and take him for a walk or out in the car somewhere. If he's tired, he will sleep, and if not, . Is he hungry? Try him with a snack and a drink. Don't let him cry for ages, it won't benefit you or him.

I really understand with a first baby that you want to do everything by the book, with set nap times and set feeding times because I was the same. But I have 3 DCs now and with my third was much more relaxed and she was a much happier baby as a result.

janey223 · 27/04/2013 10:24

If he's fighting them he might be ready to drop one.

It will probably save your sanity to try cry it out or one of those to get him to self settle.

Sympathies, I had PND and DS was the same but he was actually often crying because of allergies/reflux. We're only now really getting there with self settling, he's nearly 16m, he still needs me there but actually takes me to bed when he's tired.

Original poster
MrsHelsBels74 · 27/04/2013 19:41

The thing is, he has a special sort of cry when he's tired that he never makes at any other time so I know he needs sleep, but just fights it.

OP posts:
CreatureRetorts · 27/04/2013 19:49

Maybe you need to catch him before he's tired. Does he have a routine? Mine were napping at roughly 9am and 1pm (so I'd put them down just before then) at that age. If I missed the window they'd fight sleep.

Honeymoonmummy · 27/04/2013 19:56

Your post could have been written by me when DC were little! (2 and 4.5 now). It's really hard but as another poster says, best just leave them in cot for 10 mins and go for lie down next door than risk losing it with them (not that I'm suggesting youd ever hurt him) Be kind to yourself and try to talk to DH again when you're not in the heat of the moment. Are you on ADs? I took sertaline, it really helped with the rage. All the best x

Original poster
MrsHelsBels74 · 27/04/2013 19:59

Yes am on ADs. He does normally get tired 2 hours after getting up, hadn't thought about putting him down just before that. Will definitely bear it in mind.

DH does try his best but I'm getting to the point where I resent looking after them at the weekend because I've done it all week & do find it a chore at times. It's just a mess.

OP posts:
janey223 · 27/04/2013 20:59

It does sound like DS when he was ready to drop a nap - still sleepy but not wanting it. How long does he sleep for? I think we had 3 a day at that point x

Original poster
MrsHelsBels74 · 27/04/2013 21:20

Usually about 1/2 an hour as I can't get him to sleep in his cot during the day so he sleeps on me & the slightest thing wakes him. I know it's not ideal but I just don't know what to do.

OP posts:
PeneloPeePitstop · 27/04/2013 22:49

Do you have a swing? That was effective with the boys

janey223 · 28/04/2013 08:48

Can you take him out for a few days near nap times and let him get into a routine on his own?

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