I've had a bad day and now I'm having a bad night but all I can think of is going and jumping off a bridge which is a ridiculous thing to do and I'd call the crisis team but I've already called them once tonight and in scared they're going to cart me off to hospital if I call and tell them this and I bloody well hate feeling like this and I probably sound like an attention seeking nightmare but I can't get the fucking thought out of my head and it's driving me nuts.