What should I tell my ds's mental health nurse

[crazedupmom]

Hi
Its a bit odd really but my 10 year old ds my only dc has recently been assessed as having low level anxiety.
Our gp referred us to a centre that deals with children with mental health issues.
Ds's mental health Nurse a male has already met with myself and ds and lots of questions were asked about ds and some of the problems I have been having with him.
It was asked if there had been something happen in ds's life at about the time some of the problems started with him and it happens that I became depressed at that time about not been able to have any more dc's and then alot of hang ups about ds being an only child etc which I am still struggling with now, plus I have been unable to get over losing the ability to have more dc's even now I am struggling.
I had told the mental health nurse that I had become depressed and before he meets with ds on his own he also wants to meet with me first to go into more detail about my depression b ut I am not sure what to expect will he want to know the reason as I am not sure if I could share it with him.
what do you think.

I am interested in what this centre is that your GP has referred you to for your 10 year old son - is it CAMHS or something different. How does your son's "low level anxiety" manifest itself?

Are you sure this person is a mental health nurse, because they are not usually available to children. Or is he a social worker, working for CAMHS. I just think you need to know the status of this person. I am sure if he wants to talk about your depression he will ask if you know the cause of the illness. Did you have treatment for the depression, with which you are still struggling. It is entirely up to you what you decide to tell him - but I think if you don't, it will not help to have a clear picture of your son's problems and what was going on for you at that time, and is still worrying you today.

If you are going to talk with someone about intimate matters, it has to be someone with whom you feel comfortable and can trust and feel safe in talking to - this is why I think you need to know more about this person. I may be completely wrong but I can't imagine this is a mental health nurse, and even if it is, you still need to feel safe enough to talk to him. If he is professional, he should not judge you in any way, and again I think it might be difficult to talk about your depression without talking about the reason and how it is still affecting you. This of course may not be anything to do with your son's problems - sometimes 2 + 2 don't make 4!

Hope you get the help your son needs.

Hi crazed; I'm not in the same situation, but I do have a child with complex needs and have many years experience of questioning from various professionals.
Just answer what you are comfortable with at this stage and don't be afraid to ask the person why they want to know something or to say to them that you are not comfortable discussing it at present. If they give you a good reason for their questions then you can decide whether to answer.