Any ideas on overcoming a fear of skiing

[KatieAA]

I'm a mother of two girls (aged 9 and 6) and married to an expert skier. Both girls are fast becoming very competent and love it. I can ski but can't seem to get over a general fear of the whole thing. I thought it was to do with heights and then the chairlifts but it seems to be a bit more generalised. I haven't had a bad experience and have tried various techniques to get over it, but get hit with a wall-like panic. I would like to try and conquer this as I don't want to be a "non-skiing Mummy" sitting all day at the bottom of the slopes. I'm not looking to take on big blacks and mogul runs but would just like to be able to ski with them on blues and the occasional forgiving red run. Any ideas? Thanks

You sound a bit like me. My DH has become a good skier by being fearless and just going for it while taking tips from more expert friends. I could be much better, but am afraid to just launch down a hill and find out.

Maybe some lessons would help, especially if you could find a sympathetic instructor who would work on your confidence as well as technique. This is my plan for the future - just not this year as I am brewing a DC who will probably easily outski me in a few years time.

Why do it? Lt dh and dds go skiing without you, stay at home and go to a spa or whatever instead. Would you expect them to ski if it made them hit a wall-like panic?

I'm inclined to agree with purple and let DH do the 'looking after the girls while they're skiing' bit

Thanks for the messages. I do appreciate the point about "why do it" but the problem is I want to do it! The other half and I both work long hours in our business so keen to get some quality time with the girls particularly sharing sports. Plus both girls are constantly pleading with me to come skiing with them - hard to say no, when they are both so desparate to ski with Mummy. The ski lessons are a good idea. I've had them in the past but hadn't thought about trying to find a ski instructor to help more with the panic side of things rather than the actual skiing. Hey ho. This mummy game can be quite complicated at times - where's the handbook!

Katie - sounds just like me! One week in snow and my eldest out-skis me already. Mine is a confidence thing - all going fine and suddenly think - omg - this is fast - could i stop if a child stops in front of me? Then it all goes pear shaped!
Am planning to get a one to one instructor for a couple of sessions next time focusing on the points that make me panic (speed and feeling out of control!) I feel the same about sharing these kinds of activities with the girls - don't want them to think that it's a dad thing.

One on One instruction with a female instructor or an instructor who is sympathetic to your issue. Is it a control issue you have ie not able to control your speed/direction? An instructor I once had pointed out to me how poor the majority of skiers were, they just had confidence in what they were doing.He skiied superbly btw and was excellent in confidence building

I think you can share the skiing holiday with them without actually skiing with them all the time!

On our holidays we often all split into different lessons in the morning and then meet for lunch. I will never be as fearless or good as the boys, ds3 gets frustrated that he can't keep up with his brothers, dh is a very competent skier but dislikes endless closely packed trees and bumps.

So we all spend the bulk of the time skiing with others who are the same ability and less time skiing as a family. Means we all enjoy the holiday.

This is a late response as I've only just joined. But I am a skiing fan and I empathise with you so much. After 14 weeks skiing and being left behind on the nursery runs I really did consider giving up. But the holiday itself, the scenery, the people the hotels are so amazing I kept going back. I had so much tuition I really could teach it myself now, but nothing worked. I was told my skills were perfect, nothing needed tweaking or changing, had the right boots the right skis - but still, I felt sick with fear even before I got to the lifts! Once I got off, I would almost freeze. I had to force myself to move off and once I got going nothing improved. The slightest bump or mound of snow, slightly icy patch or hollow and I would panic. I can't tell you how many times I took my skis off and walked down to a flatter area! My husband and kids lost patience with me as they just couldn't understand what the fear felt like, no one ever does, certainly not instructors! The I watched a wold-cup ski competition on TV and noticed that the competitors waiting to go, were recreating the runs in their minds. Weaving with their hands the exact turns and undulations of the course - seeing it and experiencing it in their minds eye. I thought I wonder if that's what they call 'Sport Psychology', when tennis players and golfers can't improve because they don't believe they can so they employ these people to help get their heads in the right place! After much searching, using words like "help for nervous skiers", I struck lucky and found a company that make Hypnosis CDs for this issue (as well as others that I didn't need!). It aims to teach you how to relax, how to change those negative thoughts that run through your mind...the ones that say 'this is madness!' and takes you down an imaginary run. It boosted my confidence so much I wouldn't have believed it possible. I used it just before I went skiing for a week, played it on the plane and again at the hotel the night before I skied and I was shocked at the improvement. I'm still not as confident and bold as the rest of my family but I can now ski on the reds, something I never thought I would. And if I lose my balance or things don't go right, I don't get into a state and take my skis off - I just use the techniques I've learnt to get back in control of my mind and I'm off again. I don't think you can post links on here, so just look for Hypnosis for nervous skiers, sure you'll find it and good luck.

Just checked my CD, it's called "Overcome your skiing nerves" by Sharon Shinwell bought on Amazon. www.amazon.co.uk/Fear-Of-Skiing-Hypnosis-Cd/dp/B0012IXHH2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1381930900&sr=8-1&keywords=skiing+nerves

What is it exactly that you find scary - Heights? Speed? Possibility of falling & hurting yourself? Lack of control?

Can you snow plough? Can you ski parallel? Can you skid in parallel to a stop?

Just a bit more info, and we might be able to help.

Depends what your fear is but, from school skiing hols I'd developed a sense of being generally a bit out of control and scared I mightn't be able to stop or might get stuck on a difficult or icy patch.

A couple of good lessons reminded me about technique and demonstrated that I can stop and turn and that the technique works, however steep the slope. The idea that I was in control was a bit of a revelation and I've enjoyed two fab weeks since then.

I also realised that we'd had some really tricky icy weather on my last school trip and this wasn't usual. Though, I was pleased to find one steep icy slope and get down it just fine.

The thing is you need to act with confidence to ski well and in control. If you're hesitant and cowering you'll get out of control. So you need to start confident on something easy and work your way up, challenigng yourself occasionally to get to the next level but never doing so much at once that you can't maintain confidence and get to the bottom.

I think it does help to say to yourself "What am I actually scared of?"

I am only a fairly new skier (I like to call myself a beginner but dh says someone who can parallel turn, and ski down reds when the conditions are good is not a beginner...) and towards the end of last season I was really beginning to conquer "the fear"

I fins I need to consciously make myself relax, and usually need to take a few deep breaths before tackling harder slopes.

Btw, do you really think you want to enjoy skiing, or is it just about wanting to take part?

There is a certain amount of throwing yourself into it necessary and, I think you need the motivation of wanting to swoop about for your own enjoyment. You don't need to want to break the land-speed record but some sense of enjoying gliding at speed, the idea that it can exhilerating (sp?) when you're in control, is a necessary motivation, I think.

The ski schools at most resorts, especially in France, run classes for beginners including all ages. Half-day mummy-lessons for you, while the kids are doing same is a great way to learn. Half days also gives you the chance to ski together in the afternoon.
My husband is a great skier & I started to learn from zero when I was 25. You're not the only once starting with doubts but most instructors are great at building your skill levels to suit.

Most group lessons in most resorts cost similar to 1wk ski pass prices, for five days classes