Disturbing finds in house clearance

[Lockedboxed]

Clearing a hoarder’s house is not fun at all but the most disturbing find was locked boxes of all manner of books and sex toys. You really would never have thought it. Never felt unsafe with the owner (until their diagnosis of dementia, but meds keep them calm now).

I can’t unsee it (and I’m trying to be open minded about consenting adults). I think it might help if anyone has solidarity from their own upsetting finds, to make me feel less alone. Please tell me this isn’t the only time this has happened.

(Regular poster but name changed for this as combined my posts would be outing).

You need to start your own thread @IcyHedgehog your post will get lost on this one.

But what if it was full of gold or diamonds? Definitely have to open it to make sure.

I know someone who was cleaning out her FILs home after him passing and found some VHS tapes in a wardrobe. She played one expecting some family home videos and it was her FIL having sex with a hoover!
She destroyed all the tapes.

OP, I found all sorts of similar things belonging to my parents including my dad’s awful BDSM porn. I’m not over it. I don’t think you’re being pearl clutching.

When I helped husband clear out his grandfather's. We found all kinds of bondage and evidence that he had also been scammed by 2 across seas women and possibly married another 🤣 lots of disturbing finds there along with polaroid pictures.

My adult children lost their father ( my exhusband) to suicide in March. They are young men. They have obviously watched porn. They were ' surprised ' by the amount and type of porn he had. The silicone vagina with bonus arse hole and shower attachment to clean out your bum before being pegged ( variety of dildos also in his stuff) and copious nudes of his final girlfriend were a treat too.
When we cleared out 89 year old FILS house we found viagra, a cock pump and rings to stop it deflating once pumped.
People have sex. The majority of people on here have sex and probably have a vibrator. My dad worked away for a lot of our childhood. My brother and I found a funny vibrating thing in mums drawer when we were 6 and 7. We thought it was a hilarious thing. Mum said " Oh that's for when my shoulder is sore". Made perfect sense ( it was white plastic not ribbed and veiny like today's offerings.) It was only years and years later that the penny dropped.

Not the same thing at all, but when clearing out my grandparents house, my Mum and her siblings found out two of them had a different father. Her grandparents married when she was six months pregnant and my grandfather took on someone else's child. They then had one together, and she had another with the other father. My grandad must have known as the two with a different father looked totally difference to their four joint children.

I used to be a Probate Secretary and chap I worked for was Executor of an estate, so had to go in and find relevant paperwork. He could hardly get through the door, he said you had to walk over piles of newspaper everywhere, the chap had regularly over the years bought joints of meat and left them to rot in the old larder, cans of outdated food everywhere and regularly didn't use the toilet! He was a regular client and we had no idea he lived like that.

Yes, our finds have meant we won’t be developing the old camera films!

I had to sleep, get DC sorted this morning and now work but thanks for all the posts! Will read them with a glass of wine later.

What's disturbing about finding sex toys? Good grief OP, there is nothing disturbing about it. Millions of people use them with considerable pleasure 😀

I find disturbing you think you wouldn't have felt safe with the owner if you had known. Sex toys are not illegal or predatory in any way. You didn't find child porn, you found toys many adults, specially women, keep in a draw.

FFS

Omg the crocheted posing pouches! 😂 Hilarious! This thread is at every turn funny, poignant and strange. Definitely one for Classics.

She said clear, not clean.

Sex toys are just that, if that was their thing then great, just bin them!.

When my uncle died we found he had a collection of both Playboy & Mayfair back to issue 1 in mint condition, they sold for thousands at auction!

@Alondra Thank you, I am not completely naive but have had to deal with both quantity and things I had no idea existed… a lot of anal books and toys for those who needed more information, some bondage (rope and chains are easier to recycle discreetly though 😂).

I started the thread because I did wonder if I needed to give my head a wobble. But this is not AIBU and is in elderly parents because I hoped to find solidarity, among the many of us caring for our elders with dementia and also clearing out both public and private lives from homes that need to be sold to provide their care.

Right, must get to work but will come back later.

Please start a new thread ... I think you've posted on here accidentally....please do it right away so we can help you.

Just remember your parents, although elderly and with dementia were young once - in the 60's/70's era of free love and punk rock they were having it large!!

There's that bit in Queer As Folk, where one of the characters dies. His friends go to his house and de-gay it before his mother goes to clear it.
Removing the magazines, the books and the toys.
People have their own lives we know nothing about..
People have rooms and items not for public view.
If you have the 'opportunity' to go through that 'curtain' you need to leave any preconceptions behind.

since I was diagnosed with cancer - fortunately so far so good- I’ve been obsessed with Swedish death cleaning and not accumulating crap! Also from clearing my parents’ house of 40 years

You have to be careful with that - an A&E consultant mate told me about the unfortunate chap who tried to satisfy himself with a Henry, the sharp inner edge of the metal tube, coupled with pressure caused him to be what medics call "de-gloved" - arrived at A&E still attached - imagine the embarrassment😁

My family member had extra children. I don't understand the problem with sex toys tbh or why you suddenly feel unsafe for that reason.

My husband was helping his Dad and his wife (she wasn't there at the time), clear their place out abroad. My husband came across a sex toy and pictures of his Dad's wife wearing lingerie and in some pictures nothing at all!! It's something you can't unsee!!! However, he didn't say word, and disposed of the sex toy and put the pictures in a box to be transported back to the UK!! My husband had used his Dad's tablet, and where he hasn't shut tabs down, it's opened porn sites up - he's in his 70s!!

💚 I’m so sorry 💚
If it helps my baby ( toddler now ) can be too much sometimes.
And I love him more than life. If possible please try not to take it to heart, your Mum might have written that after a rough day and not really mean it

Years ago I went with DH to the Sex Expo in Sydney. We had a great time but there's one thing I'll always remember. There was a stall selling cup vaginas sex toys for men and I was curious as hell. I've always wondered about the feeling a man gets from inserting his penis in our vg. OMG. I put my index finger there and the sensation was unbelievable. Soft as velvet and gently sucking, It wasn't even powered but the feeling on my finger was incredible. My DH looked at me smiling and said "good huh?

I bought it. He didn't use it but from time to time I'd put my finger in it because the feeling was so incredible. A couple of years ago I disposed of all our toys, we are in our 60s and sex have changed for both of us. We enjoy it as much but toys are no longer needed.

That actually made me laugh. What an image 😂

It would be like an episode of Brassic.