How can DM visit DF if stops driving?

[SabrinaEvolutuon]

DM is in the early/middle stages of dementia. Waiting for a memory clinic appt. Sibling and I feel it's time she stopped driving. She currently visits DF in his care home (Alzheimer's) every day. It's local but too far for her to walk or bus. Has anyone been in this position? We thought about getting a carer to order her taxis each day but it's hard to get them at the right time in the morning (she's in assisted living). We don't want to take this on every day ourselves. Just wondering if we're missing an obvious solution.

could you make a regular booking with a taxi company?

You book her a taxi for 11am, or whatever each day with the same firm?

Could you pre book taxis for the week/month up front? So have one booked daily to arrive at X time and bring home? or family do certain days on a rota? every day is a big commitment for one person but one day a week or alternate weeks is less so.

Some carers would take her, support, then drive home as their role. You could speak with Age UK or a private care agency. It may be that you have a daily set up for this as part of their role.

Sounds difficult though, really feel for your family.

Have you spoken to social services about whether any support might be available? Maintaining family or other personal relationships is one of the eligibility outcomes in the Care Act. That could apply to both your mother and your father.

Just to add your mum may be eligible for care support to assist with this.

Speak to social services or carers link

We thought about a regular daily booking but she rings DF's care home at 9.20 every day and if he's still asleep she doesn't go. So not sure what would happen there. Have applied for AA for her but was refused. Not sure if she would accept a carer to go with her, or how expensive that would be, but will consider this. Will also speak to Age UK and carers support too. Thanks for replying, all of you.

Do you have a good neighbours scheme in your area?

It looks like that scheme is no longer operating. There might be too many "moving parts" in a setup like that, as DM can't organise anything all herself.

@SabrinaEvolutuon

There might be a volunteer service that offer lifts.

You might have to speak to the council or maybe the Doctors might know of one.

We have a mini bus service in the area that you have to pre-book but it comes to your door and is free to pensioners.

I think she will have to pre book and pay, either taxi or care worker, and swallow the cost if he is asleep that morning.

my mum used volunteer taxis but they still had to be pre booked.

I've emailed the local large taxi firm and will ask about carers tmrw.

Is there some reason why she has to visit first thing in the morning? Could she not go later so theres less chance if him being asleep?

She wants to go in the morning, be home in time for lunch and spend the afternoon in the lounge of her building. That's her routine and she's not well either. DF is often not so good in the afternoon. It's not often that he sleeps in. We'd just have to suck up the cost on those days.

If you have a local driving miss daisy franchise in your area they will fill this gap excellently, acts as more of a companion and driver rather than a taxi, more expensive but more personal and caring

If she’s in supported living that should be something they can give support for. Even if it’s just Mon-Fri as I know in my dads it’s all emergency support at weekends

Will try DMD tmrw and see if I can get to speak to Manager at mum's. Taxi firm don't do personal accounts, only business but building manager might have an alternative maybe.

I would contact your local Age UK branch and ask if they know of any local transport services for older people.
www.ageuk.org.uk/services/in-your-area/

Driving Miss Daisy is another option but it is pricy.
Is there a very local taxi firm that would take a regular permanent booking? Someone I know did this to
work twice a week. They didn’t book separately each trip. It was a set booking, same time, same place weekly. It was a local company.

Also worth contacting any local churches to see if they have any
transport assistance schemes running.

Does she have a social worker? They could help arrange transport. They would have access to community transport and voluntary drivers

I’d have thought this is the exact sort of scenario assisted living should assist with, in terms of solutions.

You could probably pay someone privately for this if you advertised locally.

Why was she refused AA I know lots who get this - never known a refusal

You'd think!

No SW as mo diagnosis.
No reason given as to why AA refused.
Church is not an option.

When did you apply for AA and did you DIY or did you get help? If she can no longer organise herself and she lives alone in assisted living I'd be surprised if she doesn't qualify - ask your local Age UK/Age Concern/Cit Advice/Independent Age for help in completing the form again.

If she has a diagnosis of dementia do the DVLA/her insurance company know?

She may not need this yet, but might a future plan be for her to move into the same care home, so they can be together?