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Original poster

Reception teacher put DS's drawing in the bin!

45 replies

Sheila · 17/12/2004 12:48

DS (4.75 yo) told me his teacher made him re-do his colouring of father xmas yesterday - she held up his first drawing in front of the whole class and asked "is this how we colour, children?" before putting it in the bin and making him do it again.

To me this sounds appalling - victorian in its severity. What does it matter how he coloured in his Santa? I can't see what he can have done to merit such humiliation.

Truth is I'm v. scared of his teacher myself and it's the last day of school. I have to try to catch her when I pick DS up this afternoon. I'm afraid I won't put DS's case well, may let him down by being cowardly and not standing up for him.

Need help! Anyone else dealt with a similar situation?

OP posts:
DingWongMerrilyOnHigh · 17/12/2004 12:49

what a horrid old cow

Original poster
Sheila · 17/12/2004 12:53

My thoughts exactly! What do I do about it?!

OP posts:
SnowmAngeliz · 17/12/2004 12:53

Bitch!!!!
How to crush a child in one easy step.
I hope you complain about her so she doesn't get away with this sort of behaviour.

Let us know how it goes. (Hope your little boy is o.k++++++++)

FlashingRudolphNose · 17/12/2004 12:54

Good grief - could you try along the lines of "ds was very upset yesterday about having his work ridiculed in front of the class. Was this really necessary?" Have to say that I'm a complete coward too about this kind of thing but have realised that our children only have us to stick up for them. Reception is all about settling children into school and encouraging them IMO, not putting them down in front of the whole class. Horrible for your ds .

MrsBigDrumsADrumming · 17/12/2004 12:54

Oh that horrid woman! your ds is not even 5 and what does she expect? Picasso!?

I had a teacher like that when I was young going to school in Austria. He loved publicly humiliating pupils that weren't good enough at the subject taught... not to mention we had draconian punishments for doing practically nothing! Then again we are talking 20 odd years ago... but behaviour like your ds's teacher is totally unacceptable.

Try and stay calm when you talk to her (hard I know) and just find out why she did it! Problem is if you loose your temper then it might make things worse for ds

SantaClausfrau · 17/12/2004 12:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas · 17/12/2004 12:56

Go in knowing you are in the right. I always find that helpful. Believe in yourself and that will help you say what you want to say.

spacedonkey · 17/12/2004 12:56

I would complain about this. I am appalled on your behalf sheila. People like that should not be in the teaching profession.

shepherdswatchtheircatsbynight · 17/12/2004 12:57

How awful! poor ds Talk to the head directly and complain formaly. That must have been so humiliating and, as you say, victorian! What's next writing on slates?!

blossomgoodwill · 17/12/2004 12:59

Out of order - surely all work that any child does should be praised? I am gobsmacked .
Go in and put your ds's side across. Remember teachers are not god and you have every right to find out why this horrible incident happened. Good luck

Original poster
Sheila · 17/12/2004 12:59

I was going to approach it from the starting point of "just wanting to find out what happened".

I accept that I've only heard DS's side of the story, but what can he possibly have done to deserves such treatment?

Souds to me like she just lost it.

OP posts:
SuzyStockings · 17/12/2004 13:00

Sheila, only read your post as have to go to meeting shortly but I think that's disgusting and indefenadble (word?).

I wouldn't talk to her I'd talk to the head. How can anyone publicy humilate a 4 year old. it's outragious. In fact I'm furious - I'll give her what for!!

poor little boy.

moondog · 17/12/2004 13:01

F***ing bitch
People like this have no place around little children.
Check your facts then approach her and if still not satisfied, go to the head.
Outrageous. I would want to KILL her!!

Original poster
Sheila · 17/12/2004 13:01

V. reassuring by the way to learn that I'm not the only one who finds this unacceptable. Thank you!

OP posts:
spacedonkey · 17/12/2004 13:02

I would definitely talk to the teacher first to get her version of events before approaching the head.

InDulciJulieF · 17/12/2004 13:05

It would ONLY be acceptible if your ds had, in a fit of tantrum had scribbled over his drawing or something similar.

Otherwise I'D GO UP THE WALL!!!!

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas · 17/12/2004 13:07

No no, definitely talk to the teacher concerned first, not the head. That is going too far at this stage. Your approach is a good one. It allows her the chance to explain what happened. If you find her answer satisfactory, fine, you haven't gone in all guns blazing and made a fool of yourself. If you find her answer unsatisfactory (more likely I would have thought!) then you have time as she speaks to formulate your reply. Goood luck.

mullgedwine · 17/12/2004 13:10

I would speak to the teacher to find out her side of the story, and then if you are not satisfied,( which i imagine you won't be, as it sounds inexcusable behaviour) then i would make a formal complaint to the head. Might be worth checking on your local education authority's complaints procedure, so they don't try and fob you off. Go in with as much information as you can. I would probably start off by saying to the teacher that "xxx is what ds told me, i would be grateful if you could explain to me what happened from your point of view". Ask her open questions beginnning with How Why or What, that she can't answer with a one word Yes or No, and you will find her doing more talking than you - leaving you thinking time.
I would be appalled if my child was treated in that way - go for it!

popsycal · 17/12/2004 13:11

talk to the teacher first then if not satisfied take it up with the head after christmas

coppertop · 17/12/2004 13:11

What an awful thing to do. My ds1 is 4.5yrs and has no idea whatsoever about colouring in pictures. He just kind of scribbles over the top of the picture with whatever colour pencil he finds first. I don't think many 4yr olds have the fine motor skills to colour in perfectly.

I would ask her what's expected of ds wrt colouring and take it from there. If the story is accurate I would complain to the Head.

tatt · 17/12/2004 13:15

Ask her what was wrong with it first. Then explain that your son was very upset and ask her if she can find a better way to deal with it next time. Teachers do get very stressed during this term (all the performances, I think) but its always best to let them have a chance to expalin before you blow up. It does sound terrible.

Original poster
Sheila · 17/12/2004 13:15

My suspicion is that DS probably wasn't "paying attention" to the instructions she was giving out (he said he didn't see the example she put up on the board) or he could just have been messing about. I guess I will find out later. Still don't think she should have done this though.

Difficulty is that I have to try to catch her at the end of the school day on the last day of term in competition with all the other parents and in front of DS. No time to arrange a separate appointment. Bummer.

OP posts:
ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas · 17/12/2004 13:17

Admittedly not the best time. As an ex-teacher I know that the last day of term, especially the Christmas term, the staff feel rather like the children do. They just want to go home and let the holidays begin. Still, if you feel this strongly, she will just have to wait until she has seen you, won't she?

Miriam2 · 17/12/2004 13:21

Dreadful! 'Colouring in' isn't a skill to be prized at that tender age anyway. What's more important is doing his best and expressing himself. Oh and getting praise for his achievements! Miserable cow....and I would add poor teaching. She will probably deny it happened like that, but I don't see why your ds at such a young age could make that up. He must have been understandably shocked and hurt. Definitely right to speak to her, you are not over-reacting. Go for it.

StuffTheMagicTurkey · 17/12/2004 13:49

Its a big no no to do this sort of public humiliation tactic with children. If I didn't feel a child had listened or done their best, I would talk to them about it but would never single a child out for humiliation in front of the class in this way - not good practice .

So what if its the last day of term? Insist its important you speak to her. As others have said, check the facts first - recount exactly what your ds told you and ask the teacher to confirm this is what she did. If indeed it did happen, then tell her you hope your child is not treated in this manner again and that you believe there are better ways to help a 4 year old understand the standard of their work could have been better (because there are).