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Original poster

"bum show" at school

41 replies

DimpledThighs · 27/03/2007 10:22

I have to 'talk' to my son's teacher today as my son (7yrs) and another boy and girl have been encouraging each other to flash their bums then one of the boys went and told and now I have to have a chat with the teacher because this is a serious issue.

I can't see the seriousness - I know they need to learn not to do it but to instill fear of it being 'wrong'??

How do I approach this conversation with the teacher?

(no suggestions that I flash him my bum please - need more fake tan before I take that approach!)

OP posts:
confusedandignorant · 27/03/2007 10:26

I thought most kids went through this stage.

Seriously though the teachers are obsessed with rules and protocols and are scared about child protection (as much for their own sake as for the child)if only it was possible to tell the school not to be so bl--dy silly and use some common sense

An alternative would be to delay meeting until after easter then it will have blown over

Original poster
DimpledThighs · 27/03/2007 10:27

yes - 'tis my birthday today and last thing I want is a waffly chat about my ds's 'attitude' (which is at all times terrible - hurrah!)

OP posts:
harpsichordcarrier · 27/03/2007 10:28

a serious issue?!?!?
they need to get a grip.
I can't believe that this is something they can't deal with.
obviously you need to explain to ds that this is something that isn't appropriate, but really what a storm in a tea cup

harpsichordcarrier · 27/03/2007 10:28

I like the sound of your ds

Hathor · 27/03/2007 10:30

Guess the teacher just wants to make sure you and she have an agreed approach to control of bum flashing. Agree you don't want to make a big issue of it, but they can't let all the kids go round flashing bums can they. Your child presumably knows it is a bit rude and naughty.
We used to do it out of sight behind the bikesheds.

confusedandignorant · 27/03/2007 10:32

They can be so daft that things that can be dealt with by a "you shouldn't be doing that it isn't very pleasant/fair/etc" are passed up the school to heads and local authorities as each level doesn't want to reprimand the children

NotReadThread · 27/03/2007 10:33

Are all the parents of the 'infamous flashers' being called in?
Perhaps you could have a word with them in advance and just confirm that they too find the school's reaction rather OTT.
If you all meet together and pass this message on to the school, they may see how they are over-reacting.

Greenshoots · 27/03/2007 10:34

Silly buggers.

I would just be very jolly and poke fun at the teacher. Honestly, how silly can you get.

confusedandignorant · 27/03/2007 10:36

Is that right a male teacher? He is probably scared to death about being in the class when the children are doing this,

daisy1999 · 27/03/2007 10:40

can't see what's wrong with the teachers approach. Surely you wouldn't want this ignored? I think it's good he's involving you.
I think you're in danger of blowing this into something that's bigger than it is.

Ali5 · 27/03/2007 10:41

I think it is quite a serious issue but the context is important. If it's just a one off thing then, yes, the school could deal with it in low key 'don't be so silly' kind of way. However, if it's happened a few times and the school's low key approach hasn't worked then they are justified in calling for your support - just the same as they would for other issues of behaviour that are repeated. If it's happening at playtime then the teachers are considering that other children may be offended, or more importantly, if it's a primary school with Year 6 children around, your ds and his friends may be the object of ridicule and would you really want his privates on show to children who are approaching puberty and teenage years?
I think in situations like this schools are only trying to instill behaviour that's appropriate, in or out of school.

Hathor · 27/03/2007 10:48

Yes - if they are flashing in the classroom, then it is a serious control/respect for teacher issue. If in the playground, then not so serious, but need to instill some appropriate self-respect in your child about body parts. I think the teacher is correct to ask to talk to you first if your son is the leader of the bum flashmob.

Original poster
DimpledThighs · 27/03/2007 11:18

TBH I think he is a bit bored!

I can se that it is serious but he was crying in bed last night as he thought he had done something really bad - that is what has pissed me off really.

OP posts:
FrannyandZooey · 27/03/2007 11:20

Oh flaming nora

SEVEN YEAR OLDS IN SHOWING THEIR BUMS SHOCK HORROR

it is SOOOO normal and I would think making a big deal of it will freak them out for life

twats

(sorry DT, but really, they are mad aren't they?)

FrannyandZooey · 27/03/2007 11:21

have now read thread

Original poster
DimpledThighs · 27/03/2007 11:22

yeah - in fact to cheer my ds up last night guess what I did?

Go on guess?

Yup - you're right!

OP posts:
Greenshoots · 27/03/2007 11:22

You could take it as evidence of good future job prospects - he'll be primed for a lifetime of murderously dull and tacky Office Parties where the manager gets hammered and photocopies his arse.

FrannyandZooey · 27/03/2007 11:23

( )( )

here you can show him mine when he gets home

(silly twonks, mutter mutter)

Greenshoots · 27/03/2007 11:26

No Franny, yours looks like this

I

OrmIrian · 27/03/2007 11:30

But what if another child went home, slightly misreported the events to their parents and came charging into school complaining that the school was encouraging under-age sex. Could happen.....

But seriously the 'attitude' talk is a bit OTT unless he has been tackled about several times and refused to listen. Or unless there are other issues that they are concerned about. Incidentally I can categorically state that none of my children have ever gone through that stage - not in public anyway. Don't think I've seen any other kids doinf it either. Drunken teenagers maybe...

Hathor · 27/03/2007 11:31

Awww poor mite. Not wrong at all, just a little bit rude. (Tell him some delicate people might not like it). Not really doing any harm is it? Hope you find it is not such a big deal with the teacher when you meet him. Expect he flashed his bum when he was little.

PrettyCandles · 27/03/2007 11:32

Tell him your opinion of the matter, deal with him how you feel you should deal with it (and I agree, it's perfectly normal 7yo scatological fun, but perhpas inappropriate). And then explain that in schoo lyou have to conform to certain standards of behaviour. He hasn't harmed anyone, he is not 'bad', he jusst has to accept that in this he must conform and stop doing it. End of. And if the teacher kicks up a fuss then tell him you will speak to the teacher yourself. That way hopefully he won't be afraid of what his techer thinks/says/does, but will know that even if he has done something 'wrong', you are on his side and don't think he is 'bad'. Does that make sense?

PrettyCandles · 27/03/2007 11:33

Erm, by 'him' I mean your son, not the teacher!

Hathor · 27/03/2007 11:33

Saw a man mooning out the door of the pub the other day - at a 50 year old party. Get it over with young I say!

Hathor · 27/03/2007 11:34

when